


Someday We'll Get it Right

by BeatleChick



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: Angst, F/M, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-25
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-02-22 15:00:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 53,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2511881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeatleChick/pseuds/BeatleChick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ellie and Ben have been in a relationship for a few months and things have been going great; until Ellie walks in on him with another woman.  As Ellie leaves, Ben realizes that he loved her all along.  Can one mistake ruin everything they have built up until that night?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the song that inspired the title.
> 
> http://youtu.be/RZ_Q5DqF_Vo

Ellie juggled the bags of groceries, the bottle of wine and her overnight back over to her left so she could unlock the door to Ben’s flat. She carefully closed the door behind her and set her bag down to take her shoes off in the entryway. She was supposed to be coming over at 6 but she figured she would come by a few hours earlier and make Ben dinner. It had been awhile since they had seen each other and she knew with his schedule he was probably living off take away. She put the groceries on the counter in the kitchen and she paused as she heard a noise in the living room. She went around the corner and stood on her tip toes to look over the counter at the couch. 

Ben was laying on the couch with his shirt off. He was pushed about halfway up so he could take the shirt off the girl who was sitting in his lap. She Was kissing him passionately and then giggled as they separated when her shirt was pulled over her head. Once her arms were freed she reached down to his belt and started to undo the buckle. Ben leaned into her and started kissing her neck just under her left ear.

Ellie fell back onto her heels and took a breath. She turned and walked into the entryway. She set the bottle of wine onto the floor and picked up her shoes. She then found herself in the hallway outside the flat. She didn’t know how she made it down eight flights of stairs but the next thing she knew she was stumbling past Gerry as he held the lobby door open for her. He said something but she just kept walking and turned the corner to continue down the street. 

An hour later Ellie was sitting on the floor of her living room and looking out the window at the people walking by on the streets. She loved to people watch. She liked to make up stories about the people’s lives and where they were going or coming from. But today she couldn’t think of anything. She felt numb. She wasn’t sad or mad or hurt. She felt nothing. She had closed herself off from everything and simply sat still and looked out on the street.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As Ben nipped her earlobe she let out a moan. He started kissing down her neck and as he met her collarbone he opened his eyes to follow her freckles to her shoulder. Once his eyes were open he didn’t see any freckles. Shock hit him in the chest; Ellie’s freckles…this wasn’t Ellie. He froze and pulled back to look into Brittany’s face. She smiled slowly and leaned in to kiss him. Ben jerked back so hard his back slammed into the couch. Brittany looked at him in confusion and then smiled again and leaned down to follow him. Ben pushed her up and off him to the other side of the couch and he jumped to his feet. 

“What is it?” Brittany asked from the couch, watching Ben turn away from her. “Benedict?”

Ben started pacing the living room and franticly dragging his hands through his hair and over his face. “You should go.” He said, not turning to look at her.

“I thought you wanted this? You’re the one who invited me over.” Brittany replied.

“It was a mistake. I’m sorry, please leave.” Ben looked around for her shirt on the floor. When he found it he handed it to her. Once she took it he looked for his own and slid it on.

“Jesus Christ.” Brittany yanked her blouse on and then stomped over to her purse on the table, grabbing it up she slammed to the front door. “Goddamn bag.” She muttered and then slammed the door on her way out.

Ben blew out a deep breath and made his way to the stairs and climbed to his bedroom. He slowly undressed and stepped into the boiling shower. He stood under the spray for a moment and let the hot water turn his skin red. What a cock up. He and Ellie were having an amazing time. She made him laugh and give up some of the stress of his hectic life. They had serious conversations, playful competitions and a good life together. He was so afraid of letting go completely that he went and did the one thing to upset the balance. He met another girl. 

It started out innocently enough, sharing a table at a crowded coffee shop and chatting lightly about trivial conversation topics. Eventually he asked if she wanted to head to his place for another cup of tea. The walk back with this girl, Brittany, was a war within Ben’s head. He liked Ellie, sure, but what if it’s not meant to be? Should he break it off and save them both the heartache of going any deeper? Brittany seemed nice. Maybe he just craved company and the distraction. It was harmless really. 

The next thing he knew they were on the couch. The next few minutes were a blur, until Ben snapped out of his daze. 

Ben rinsed the shampoo from his hair and it hit him. He loved Ellie. She wasn’t just some girl. She was his Eleanor. The woman who would go out of her way to make him smile. Ellie. The girl he would make elaborate surprises for just to see the look of shock on her face, followed by her adorable giggle and her throwing her arms around his neck. He smiled and turned off the water. He was in love with Ellie. He dried off quickly and wrapped the towel around his waist. 

He wiped the steam off the mirror and got out his razor. He would tell her tonight. She was coming over in a few hours for dinner at home. They hadn’t seen each other in a few days and tonight was the cure for some much needed time together. As he shaved he planned it out. He would order in something fancy and they would have a cozy candle lit dinner at home. Then after a glass of wine or two he would tell her. He never wanted to be without her. Ben finished up shaving and went into the closet and got dressed. He checked his phone and it was still only 5 o’clock. 

He went back downstairs and into his office. This was one of his favorite rooms in his flat. Floor to ceiling bookshelves filled with anything he could ever want to read. He poured himself a drink and stepped out onto the balcony. He leaned against the railing and lit up a cigarette and looked out over London and thought about what his life would mean to him now. 

Another drink and a few more cigarettes later, Ben began to feel anxious. He checked his phone and it was now a quarter after 6. He didn’t have any missed calls or texts and it wasn’t like Ellie to be late, usually she was early. He sent out a quick text to her ‘Are you on your way Love?’ and put his phone back in his pocket.

Finally at half past he walked through the living room and into the kitchen. He started to look through his takeaway menus when he noticed the groceries on the counter. Confused he walked over and glanced through the bag. He certainly hadn’t put them there. He looked up and saw the edge of something black in the entryway. He walked over and looked down to see a bottle of wine on its side next to Ellie’s overnight bag. Confused, he crouched next to it and opened the top and looked through it. It was Ellie’s; he had seen it enough times to recognize it and the clothes inside. Brows furrowed he slowly stood up and then he felt the color drain from his face. 

Ellie had been here. It was not a problem of course; he had given her a key to his flat and told her to use it whenever she wished. It was not uncommon for her to stop by and leave leftovers for him when he was working late, or surprise him by cooking dinner when he came home. He loved that about her. But right now Ben was frantic. When had she come by? And then he heard it. Brittany had tripped over the bag when she left. Tripped over a bag that had most certainly not been there when they had first come in. Ellie had come in while Brittany was here. 

“Fuck!” The realization hit Ben like a slap in the face. She had seen them together. She had come over early to surprise him, knowing he was at the meeting that he hadn’t bothered to tell her had been cancelled. He raced up the stairs and grabbed his jacket and keys. As he slammed through the front door he called Ellie’s mobile. “Pick up Ellie. Come on, come on my love. Pick up.” He muttered as he waited for the lift. 

“Hi you’ve reached Eleanor Fraser please leave your name, number…” 

“Fuck!” Ben clicked the disconnect button and stepped into the lift. He hit redial and listened to the tone as he hoped she would pick up. The ding broke him out of his trance as the doors slid open to the Lobby. Ben raced for the doors but jerked to a stop when he saw Gerry. “Gerry! Gerry! Have you seen Ellie? Did she come through here?” Ben blurted out frantically, hoping to find out all he could.

“Yes sir, she came in with a load of bags and was headed to your place.” Gerry said, concern etching his features.

“Yes, yes but did you see her leave?” Ben questioned.

“Well, yes but I assumed you knew. She didn’t look well, and left without saying anything. I offered to hail her a cab but she just walked down the way.” 

“Time! Sorry, do you remember what time she left?” Ben tried to calm down as he noticed Gerry’s confusion.

“Time? Oh,” He looked down at his watch. “Probably about half four.” 

“Shit.” Ben muttered. “Thank you.” And he turned and walked out to the street and hailed a cab. Once inside he gave Ellie’s address and pressed redial on his mobile. 

What seemed like hours later Ben finally was at Ellie’s door. He frantically pounded on the door hoping she was home. He waited a moment and there was no response. He leaned against the door and couldn’t hear anything. She could be anywhere. Her friends would drop everything for her and she could be with any of them right now. He leaned his head against the door frame and tried to think about his next move. How could he have been such as ass. He broke his promise to her. Ellie, the girl who he never doubted had seen him with another woman. “Tom.” Ben said. He lifted his head and turned to go back out on the street. Tom would know what to do. Between the two of them they could sort this out. 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Inside her flat Ellie hadn’t moved from the window. She jumped, startled, when there was a sudden pounding on the door to her flat. ‘Ah, he must have figured out that something’s wrong’ She turned and looked towards the door. She heard a faint thump and then a minute later she heard him mumble something and walk away. Well that was a bullet dodged. For now.

Turning back to the window she saw Ben come out onto the sidewalk. She should’ve moved. Something. But she was frozen, and suddenly he looked up and saw her. She saw the connection on his face right before he disappeared back into the building.

“Damn.” Ellie muttered. “Now what?” She couldn’t face him right now. She didn’t know what to say, or how to say it. She hadn’t thought about her own feelings about the situation, let alone how to explain them to him. And there it was, the pounding on the door again.

“Ellie? Please, Love. I saw you at the window. I know you saw, I know you’re in there. Please let me in. Let me explain, it’s not what you think.” More knocking at the door. “Please Ellie, Please.” More knocking.  
After a while of Ben’s monologue from outside the door Ellie got up and went into her bedroom. She took off her clothes and got into bed. She put her headphones in her ears and turned her iPod up until she couldn’t hear anything but her music in her ears. Finally she pulled the blanket up over her head and closed her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the song that inspired the title.
> 
> http://youtu.be/RZ_Q5DqF_Vo


	2. Chapter 2

Ben had been standing at her door for about half an hour. This time of night she wouldn’t have to leave until the day after tomorrow, unless she needed groceries – which he doubted. He sighed and sat down on the hall floor across from Ellie’s door. He pulled out his phone and dialed.

“Ben, mate, how are you?” Tom’s voice came through the speaker.

“Tom. I need your help.”

“Ben? What’s happened, is everything ok? Is it Ellie? Is she ok?”

“Something’s happened. Shit, I…I did something. Something stupid. I need to see Ellie but,” Ben took a deep breath, “But she won't see me.”

“Ben why don’t you meet me at mine? I’ll be there in twenty.”

“I can’t leave. I shouldn’t leave, what if Ellie changes her mind?”

“Are you in her flat?”

“I’m outside hers.”

“Why are…ok come over. It won’t do any good trapping her in like that. Whatever is going on Ellie has always been very private, she likes space to think.”

Ben groaned, Tom was right. He stood and walked down the stairs to the street. “Alright. See you in a few.” He hailed a cab, the entire time searching every window of Ellie’s place hoping to catch a glance of her. As the cab pulled over Ben sighed. No such luck, her flat was completely dark. The ride to Tom’s was fairly quick. As he pulled up he saw Tom walking to the door of his building. He turned as Ben left the cab and waited while he paid the driver. Then they both walked in silence up to Tom’s flat. Ben went to the kitchen as Tom set his things down and turned on a couple of lights. Ben walked into the living room to join Tom, holding out a beer for him.

“Help yourself.” Tom said with a smirk as he took the beer. He watched as Ben took a healthy drag from his and then threw himself onto Tom’s couch. “What’s going on?” He asked as he sat in the chair across from him.

“I fucked up.” Ben crouched forward and put his head in his hands. “I can’t lose her Tom. I’ve fallen in love with her.”

“Then what’s the problem? I’ve known you loved her for a while now; I was just waiting for you to put it together for yourself. Why would you being in love with her make her leave?”

“She found me with someone else.”

“Jesus.”

Ben looked up suddenly, “Not like that! It wasn’t anything, not really. I…we…I mean it wasn’t…” He fumbled over his reasoning.

“Jesus.” Tom said again, staring in disbelief at his old friend.

“I know.” Ben hung his head again. “I don’t know what to do.”

“What happened?” Tom asked in a flat voice.

“Ellie and I are, were, great. We had a great thing going and I guess I got restless. I started thinking that maybe I just liked the idea of being with someone.” Ben looked up and saw Tom staring at him in disbelief. He couldn’t take it so he stood up and started pacing. “I didn’t know. I liked Ellie and we had so much fun together and we worked really well together, but what if I just needed the company? What if I should break it off now before either of us gets hurt?” Ben kept babbling on while he walked from one end of the room to the other.

“So my meeting at BBC was canceled this afternoon and I went to grab some coffee around the corner. The place was packed so I shared a table with a woman who was sitting by herself. We started chatting and one thing lead to another and I asked her back to mine. I thought maybe if it felt the same as it was with Ellie then I would know for sure. And well it got far but not too far once I realized it really was Ellie I wanted.” Ben stopped and looked at Tom with a grin on his face, “I knew then that I was in love with her.”

“When did Ellie walk in on this revelation of yours?” Tom asked.

“I never saw her.” Ben sat back down. “I asked the other woman to leave and I went up and took a shower. Ellie was supposed to come over at 6 for dinner and she never showed. When I went back downstairs I saw groceries and her overnight bag. She must have let herself in and…and seen us…and then left. The doorman saw her leave.”

“I went over to her flat immediately and I saw her at the window, but she wouldn’t let me in. She hasn’t answered any of my calls or texts.” Ben looked frantic. “I can’t lose her Tom. What do I do? How do I fix this?”

“Jesus Ben.” Tom started,

“I know, alright? Just help me figure this out!” Ben burst out hearing Tom’s disappointment for the third time. “I’m sorry.” He added a minute later.

“It’s fine mate. Honestly.” Tom said. “Ok, so…ok…Ben, I need to tell you some things. Ellie has been in love with you for weeks now.” Ben lifted his head at this. “She didn’t tell me straight out, but everyone can see it and I called her on it a few nights ago when we were all out. She was letting you set the pace because your career is so demanding she didn’t want to add to anything else you had on your mind.”

“Fuck.” Ben muttered as he took a long drink.

“She didn’t want to push you because she was terrified of getting hurt. And now that’s exactly what you’ve done.”

“That girl you fell in love with is the best thing that could ever happen to you. She is patient and extremely loyal, and loves you for everything you are. Everything. She was so hesitant to even go out with you because she didn’t want to lose herself. So she held everything at face value and waited for the other shoe to drop. And then you slowly broke past her defenses and she gave you every part of herself. You Bloody Arse!” Tom ended his speech with a slam of his fist on the side table.

The room was silent for a while as everything settled. Finally, Ben stood up. “You’re right. She never deserved any of this and I never deserved her.” With that he started walking to the door to collect his coat.

“Ben wait,” Tom started as he followed him.

“No, you were completely right.” He pulled his coat on and turned to Tom. “And I will do everything there is within me to make this right. And if I have a shred of hope of gaining her forgiveness I will never give up. Thank you Tom. You are always able to help me see things clearly.” And he stepped out into the night.

\-----------

Ellie got up the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that. She went to work and went back to her flat. She didn’t bother bringing her mobile because she didn’t have anyone she wanted or needed to talk to just yet. One night as she lay in bed trying to focus on her music rather than her thoughts, she realized that her mobile was probably still in her purse from a few nights ago. 

And so the week ended. It had been a little over a week since she went to Benedict’s place. So she stopped by M&S on the way home and did some shopping for the basics She gathered up a few new reusable shopping bags (she wouldn’t acknowledge that she had left her other bags at his place) and finished up paying her bill. As she trudged down her street she saw that it would rain soon and she smiled to herself. Nothing made her as happy as rain. Snow was a mess but rain was clean and beautiful. She slowly walked up the stairs to her door and when she got there she saw an envelope on the floor by her door.

She bent over to pick it up and only saw her name on the front. She took out her keys and let herself into her flat. She tripped over to the kitchen counter and placed all of her groceries onto the surface and picked the letter up so she could look at it more closely.

Finally she opened it and pulled out four pieces of heavy white paper. The writing on the paper was almost illegible in a heavy handed scrawl that she would recognize anywhere. Benedict had left a letter for her. She carefully refolded the papers and placed it back in the envelope. She took out her hardback copy of The Book Thief and placed it inside the cover. 

She went back to her groceries and started putting everything in its rightful place. Halfway finished she walked over to the stereo and turned on her favorite album. The Mississippi Delta was shining like a national guitar…. Graceland was a terribly sad song, but she loved sad things. Ellie smiled to herself and walked back into the kitchen. Once she put everything away she took out her cutting board and some off the vegetables that she had bought. She put a pot of water on to boil and focused on the task at hand.

Dicing up vegetables was one of the most soothing things she could think of for the moment. She cleared her mind and slowly diced up tomatoes, onions, squash and a little garlic and basil. She turned the burner on under her skillet and drizzled a little olive oil in the bottom and threw the squash, onions and garlic in to simmer for a few minutes. While they were cooking she got out a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. She took a sip and thought over the last week. She had been a shell of a human being. Ellie was stronger than that. Once the water was boiling she dropped a handful of pasta in the water and added the tomatoes to the vegetables that were simmering in the pan. Once everything was finally done cooking she took her pasta to the living room and sat at the coffee table. 

Once dinner was over and her glass of wine was gone she came to a decision. It was time to shake it off. She needed to live her life, she knew that she would still be sad but that didn’t need to stop her from doing what she loved.

The next morning Ellie woke up late on a Saturday morning. Stretching and smiling to herself she got out of bed and into the shower. After getting dressed in her favorite jeans and nerdy T-shirt she walked out to her couch. She pulled on her favorite boots and took a bright orange scarf out of her closet, as well as her charcoal pea coat. She grabbed her purse and set out to go around town. 

The first stop was the used bookstore a few blocks away. As she walked in she slowly unwound her scarf from around her neck and pushed her bangs out of her eyes. She smiled at the cashier and walked to the back of the shop to stock up on some new reading material. Ellie had a serious book collection problem. All the bookshelves at home were overflowing and she had small piles on the floor in front of them, as well as along the window frames. She spent hours looking over every single title and cover page until she had a sharp pain in her neck and an armful of books to take with her. 

After paying for her books Ellie walked to a coffee shop and found a place in the back corner. Once she took a long sip off her latte she opened on the books she had bought and proceeded to get lost in the story. The thing about a good book is that you can live their lives for a time. You forget your own troubles and sorrows and heartaches. The character is the one in danger and despair and desolation. After two lattes Ellie figured that she should head home and face the long list of chores she had been neglecting. She sighed as she closed her book and gathered her things for the walk home.   
Ellie never noticed the man standing outside the window who watched her with concern and then walked by once she started to look up.


	3. Chapter 3

The next day Ellie did her usual weekend chores, laundry and dishes that she could ignore over the next week. As she tidied up her flat she pulled her mobile out of her purse. ‘No time like present’ she thought. So she found her charger and plugged the device in and waited for it to turn on. Once everything settled she saw that she had 23 missed calls and 14 text messages. 16 calls were all from him, the others were from work, home and a few friends. The voicemails, she didn’t bother with his, weren’t anything serious just checking in and when can we get together. After deleting the 8 texts, him again, she glanced through the others, same as the calls friends sending funny thoughts or visiting. So she called Alice and they chatted for a few minutes and agreed to meet from drink after work tomorrow. After dinner and a few episodes of doctor who Ellie climbed into her bed.

The next day of work was fairly simple. Answering calls and emails and filing never really held too much excitement for her. At a little after 6 Ellie packed up her things and headed to the King’s head just around the corner. Once she was in the front door she saw Alice at a little table by the bar and she smiled and walked over to her. 

“Hello stranger!” Alice crowed as she jumped up to hug Ellie. “Is everything alright? You look a little tired. Late night with the boy?” She asked with a smirk.

“No, no just have a lot of things going on right now. I am in the mood for some salty chips, a large beer and some fun conversation.” Ellie replied as she took off her coat and scarf and hung them on the hook near their table. 

“Ellie my love, what on Earth is going on?” Alice asked after they had ordered some food and had drinks sitting in front of them. 

“Ben and I broke up.” Ellie said flatly, and then took a deep drink of her Guinness.

“No!” Alice said, her eyes wide. “What happened?”

“I went to his place to surprise him and he was home, with another woman.” 

“As in with another woman?”

Ellie only nodded and looked away to scan the pub. She couldn’t handle Alice’s facial expressions.

“What a bastard.” Alice muttered. Again Ellie only nodded.

“So now I want to spend the evening making you laugh at my ridiculous adventures. And we don’t need to talk about this again.” Ellie said, returning to look at Alice. “Well maybe the next time I’m drunk.” She smiled.

A few hours later and several more pints, the girls left the pub and walked down the street. They were arm in arm and laughing at everything the other would say. A few minutes later they reached the main road and looked for the nearest taxi. As the cabbie pulled over Ellie pulled Alice into a tight hug. 

“Thank you so much I needed this.” She said as Alice got into the car.

“I love you kid. I’ll talk to you later, make sure you let me know you made it home safe.” Alice yelled through the open window.

“Yes mother!” Ellie replied and waved. Then she walked down the road to the closest underground station. She didn’t have to wait too long for the next train and after a few minutes she was finally in her neighborhood. She climbed to the street level and walked the few blocks to her flat. Eventually she made it to her door. As she reached in her bag for her keys she noticed something white on the floor. An envelope. She picked it up and let herself into her place.

Setting all her things in the dining room she opened the envelope and saw that this was another letter from Benedict. So she placed the pieces of papers back in its envelope and walked to her bookshelf to add it to the other. 

As the week progressed Ellie found herself slowly returning to her old life. The one before Benedict. She went to work and came home to fix dinner and read whatever she could get her hands on. Every night when she got home from work there was an envelope on her door mat. Her book was now brimming with letters throughout the pages. At this point she didn’t even bother to open them, they were simply retrieved and filed, so to speak.

On Thursday night she got a phone call. “Hello this is Eleanor.” She said into the speaker.

“Well hello Eleanor this is an acquaintance by the name of Thomas.” Tom said in reply to her formal greeting.

Smiling, Eleanor laughed. “Hello Tom, how are you?” She and Tom had become great friends over the last few months.

“Splendid, you know me.” Tom replied. “Ellie love what are you doing Saturday?”

Ellie paused, knowing Tom he wanted to go to some party or something. Considering who one of his close friends were she didn’t want to discuss the possibility of seeing him there. “I...I’m not sure…” She dropped off at the end, hoping he would explain his plans so she could come up with an excuse.

“Wonderful. Let’s go to the movies.” 

“Movies? What kind of movie?”

“Like a movie movie darling. I haven’t been in ages. We can go watch one of those blockbusters that is out and get some popcorn. I haven’t been to simply watch a movie in so long. Will you come?”

“I, Tom, I don’t really think that's such a good idea.”

“What are you talking about? It’s a brilliant idea, I should know I thought of it.” Tom continued on. Ellie didn’t want to discuss Ben with him, but she didn’t know if he knew. She must be mad, of course he knew. As she thought up a way to explain to him that she wouldn’t go Tom interrupted her thoughts. “Darling I miss my friend.”

“What do you mean?”

“You. I haven’t seen you in so long, let alone talk to you. Please? An early morning movie and then some lunch.”

“Do you always get your way?” She grumbled.

“Always.” He said, and she could hear the grin in his voice. “I’ll pick you up at 9 then. Have a good night Ellie.”

“Bye Tom, see you Saturday.” Ellie mumbled and hung up. No one could say no to that man. Well, if she was going to get back to her life this was a good way to start.

\---

Saturday morning came and Ellie was pulling on her jumper when the buzzer sounded from the living room. ‘What...’ She thought as she checked the clock, it was half after 8. Pulling the door open she was face to face with a grinning Tom.

“Good morning sunshine!” He sang and gripped her under her arms and gave her a giant hug that lifted her toes off the ground. He kissed her forehead as he set her back on her feet. He shuffled forward into the flat and closed the door behind him. “Don’t you check who’s at the door before you open it? You’re all alone here, I don’t like thinking about you getting burgled or something.” He said with a frown as he examined the door. “I’m going to get you a peephole” He muttered.

“Hello Tom, it’s nice to see you too.” Ellie said as soon as Tom was done with his examination. “What are you doing here? And why so early? I told you to call me when you were downstairs.”

“I couldn’t wait any longer.” He answered and walked over to her bookshelves. “Anything new?” He called out over his shoulder.

“A few. Help yourself I just need to grab my shoes.” Ellie yelled back as she walked into her bedroom.

Tom glanced around the place, it seemed like she was doing ok. Same Ellie, well at least for the five minutes he had seen her. As he looked around his fingers caught on something sticking out of a book. ‘What is this?’ He thought and he pulled out the book. Opening the cover he saw an envelope, along with several others all throughout the book. Before he could put the book back Ellie took it out of his hands and walked back into her room. Sheepishly Tom put his hands in his pockets and waited for her to come back out. When she walked back in Tom burst out, “Ellie I’m sorry I didn’t even realize it was private.”

“What?” Ellie asked offhandedly as she sat on the sofa to put her shoes on. “Oh don’t worry about it, it’s nothing really.” She looked up to see Tom frowning at her and she quickly walked to get her coat and scarf. “Well, what movie did you have in mind?” And she opened the door and waited for him to walk out so she could lock up.

\---

After the movie they walked a few blocks to a little sandwich shop. 

“Are you sure this is what you want? We can go somewhere with a bit more options?” Tom asked.

“Hey I like this place, if you’re worried about the price I can pay.” Ellie teased.

“Don’t be absurd you foolish woman.”

The found some seats and sat down. Once Ellie had a large cup of tea to warm her hands Tom considered what he should say.

“So, how are you?” He asked.

“Fine Tom.” She replied with a quick smile.

“Ellie, do you want to talk about-” Before he could finish his sentence Ellie jerked her head up.

“No!” She took a deep breath and put the smile back on her face. “No, I’m fine. But thank you for offering.”

“You don’t have to be so polite all the time. It’s me”

“Exactly, it’s you Mr. Perfect manners.” She laughed. “No, no. So how’s the play? Where do you go to after this?”

After a minute of looking at her and trying to get her to say what she really thought Tom answered. “It’s going wonderfully. I love theater, it’s so exhilarating. It’s nice to be in the moment as you’re acting it out.” 

They finished up lunch and caught a cab back to her place. 

“You don’t need to walk me up. I had fun today Tom. Thank you.” Ellie said and stood on her tiptoes to give him a kiss on the cheek. She smiled and turned to walk into the building.

“The letters are from Ben, aren’t they?” Tom called out at her.  
She froze on the bottom step. “It doesn’t matter.” And she continued her climb.


	4. Chapter 4

Ben was a man obsessed. He spent each day going over his plan in his head. He would give her space, but still try and remain in contact. Hopefully she was reading what he sent her. In that way at least he would be connected to her. He wouldn’t force his company on her, he would work up to that. As he paced his study he thought about what his next letter would say. After the apology he had been sending a variation of words. Somewhere detailing how magnificent she was, others talked about the future and how wonderfully they could spend it together. On Monday the letter should be something light hearted. Maybe something funny he saw when he wasn’t with her. Explain how hard he would try tell her the story in the right way so she would laugh.

In the middle of his pacing there was a knock at the door. “Tom, what are you doing-” Ben started to ask but he was cut off as the man in question pushed his way through the door and turned to look at him.

“What are you doing?” He asked with his arms crossed.

“What do you mean? I’ve been here all day.” Ben said with a confused look as he shut the door.

“No. What are you doing to Ellie?” 

“I…” Ben started and then couldn’t continue. “Nothing, I told you I would give her space.”

“Don’t play stupid.”

“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” Ben replied and then walked into his office to pour a drink. He held the bottle up to Tom with a raised eyebrow, at the nod from him he turned and poured a second glass. He handed Tom his drink and took a drink of his own.

“I saw Ellie today.”

Ben winced as he inhaled sharply and the scotch burned down his throat. “What do you mean you saw her?”

“I mean. I took her to have a nice day out. I haven’t seen her in a while and I wanted to check on her.”

“Ah.” Ben muttered.

“Do you want to tell me what you’re doing or shall I tell you what I know?” Tom asked again.

“I’m waiting for the right time.”

“Fine. The letters Ben. What are you doing with the letters?” Tom asked abruptly.

Ben let out a deep breath and moved to sit in one of the chairs. “I needed some way of letting her know I’m still here.”

“She isn’t reading them.” 

“What?” Ben looked up. “How do you know? Did she tell you that? What did she say, how is she?”

“She won’t talk about it. Any of it. She has them in a book on her shelf. The envelopes aren’t open, or at least the ones that I saw. She took the book away as soon as she saw me with it.” 

“Shit.”

“What are in the letters?” Tom asked as he took a seat across from him.

“Just some thoughts, messages, a way for me to try and get close to her again.”

“It might not happen Ben. She closing up fast, she hardly trusts me anymore. She is building up her walls with each day. She doesn’t have any trust to give right now. I’m sorry mate but you know how she is.”

“Well I won’t stop trying. Is she ok?” He asked, looking at Tom.

“She seems to be coping, she’s not back to her full cheery self but she’s doing alright.” 

“Thanks Tom. I’m glad she had a good time with you.” 

“She’s my friend too, I don’t want to lose her.”

“I know.”

\---

And so the next week went about the same as the week before. Ellie went to work, did her shopping and relaxed at home. Every day there was a letter waiting for her on her doorstep, and every day she added it to her growing collection. She couldn’t bear to read them, but at the same time she couldn’t stand the thought of throwing them away. Day after day continued in the same way as the last. 

Over the weekend she stopped by Alice’s for a few hours to watch the Doctor Who anniversary show and they had a great time guessing for hidden meanings and laughing at the fantastic writing. It was late Saturday night when Ellie headed out. It was a beautiful evening and she decided to walk home rather than catch the tube. About halfway home as she turned the corner she was slammed up against the brick wall. 

She gasped for breath as a man started yelling in her face. He wanted her wallet. So she took it out of her bag as quickly as she could and handed it over to him. 

“There’s nothing in here you bitch!” He screamed into her face when he saw there wasn’t any cash inside. 

“I’m sorry.” She apologized and cowered into the wall trying to get away from him as quick as possible.

“Fuck!” He yelled again and pulled away from her. Before she could react he reached back and backhanded her across the face. His hand hit her cheek so hard that her head slammed backwards and into the wall behind her. 

When Ellie woke up she could hardly remember what happened. Her cheek stung and her head was aching. She looked around and saw that she was lying on the sidewalk in the dark. She couldn’t really remember where she was but she was terrified that the man would come back, there was no way to know how long she had been out. She dug out her mobile and dialed the first number she thought of.


	5. Chapter 5

Ben was trying his best to memorize the three page long dialog when his phone rang. He started to simply answer it until he looked at the caller ID. His hands were shaking when he hit engage.

“Ellie?” He tried to stop his voice from cracking.

“Ben? I’m afraid. I...I…” Her voice cut out with a sob.

Ben stood up, the script falling off his lap. “Ellie? Ellie where are you? What’s happened? Are you hurt?” He ran to the door and grabbed his keys off the table.

“I...I don’t know.” 

“Look around you my darling. What do you see? Talk to me.” He sprinted down the stairs rather than wait for lift. Finally she gave him a street corner as he reached his car. “Ok, it’s ok. I’m coming to get you. Are you safe?”

“I think so. I’m alone now.”

He cringed when he heard that last part. “Alright. I’ll be there soon. keep talking to me Love. Where were you tonight?”

“Alice’s. We watched the Doctor Who show together.”

“Oh sweetheart you shouldn’t have walked home alone at this time of night.” He pressed harder on the gas pedal and gripped the steering wheel harder.

“I know, I know.” She sobbed harder.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to lecture you. I just worry about you.” He slowed down and as he turned the corner he saw her sitting against a wall. “There you are.” He threw the car in park and ran to Ellie. He looked all over her, checking for any injuries. He raised his hand to the back of her head but quickly removed it when she hissed in pain. He frowned and looked at her hair, there was blood in it. He looked at his hand and saw a little bit of blood on his palm.

“Oh my darling,” He reached to her face and turned her chin to face him. He gasped when he saw her right eye and cheek swelling and a large red mark covering the area. “What happened?”

“There was a man, and...and...I gave him my wallet but I didn’t have any money.“ She started crying again. “I’m sorry.”

“Did he hurt you more than this?” They both knew what he was asking and he let out the breath he had been holding when he saw her shake her head no. “Sweetheart I’m going to pick you up ok?” He didn’t wait for her to answer as he slid his arm under her knees and the other behind her back. He gently lifted her and carried her to the passenger door. He carefully set her onto the seat and closed the door. He ran around the car and jumped in. They sped off. 

“Ben?” Ellie mumbled as she watched the lights fly past her window. He only stared straight ahead and shifted gears. “Ben where are we going?” She asked a little louder.

“Hospital.” 

“Just take me home please I’ll be fine.”

“No.”

“No?” She wanted to argue but her head was hurting so much, and with the way Ben was driving she was beginning to feel sick. “Please Ben.” She started to cry again. “I’ll be ok, I’ll call Alice when I get there.”

“Ellie, you’ve hit your head pretty hard. You need to get it looked at.” Ben pleaded with her. He slowed down as they pulled into A&E. He parked the car and ran around to Ellie’s door. She was already opening the door when he reached it. He took hold of her hand and helped her out. He started to pick her up again and she stopped him.

“I’m alright.” She pulled her hand from his and walked towards the entrance. 

He shut the door to the car and followed after her. He didn’t try to touch her again but his hand hovered near her lower back in case she fell. Together they walked up to the front desk.

“Hello, I’ve hit the back of my head rather hard and it was bleeding but I think it’s stopped now. I just want to make sure I’m safe to go home.” Ellie explained to the woman.

“Of course my dear. You might have a concussion so it would be safer for the doctor to give you a check up.” She slid a clipboard with several papers on it across the counter for Ellie to take. “Please fill these out and we’ll call you when we have an exam room ready.” The woman smiled briefly and then turned back to her computer, thankfully she barely glanced at the man standing closely behind Ellie.

“Thank you.” Ellie replied and turned around to find a place to sit. She looked up as Ben sat next to her. “I’ll wait for the doctor. Thank you for coming to get me, I’m sorry I bothered you in the middle of the night. I’ll have Alice take me home.”

Ben just scoffed at her and took the clipboard from her. “I’ll wait.” Was all he said in reply and started filling out the forms. He had to stop and ask her some for some of the answers but mostly they sat in silence. Ellie leaned to the side of her chair and put her arm on the rest and leaned her head into her hand. She hissed when she touched her cheek.

“Let me go find you some ice for that darling.” He jumped out of his seat and carried the clipboard over to the receptionist. After talking to her for a minute he walked down a hallway and disappeared. After a few minutes he came back over to Ellie with a towel and a bag of ice. “Here sweetheart, let me see.” He murmured as he knelt in front of her.

She opened her eyes and looked at him. He smiled gently at her and started to reach for her chin. She pulled back and reached for for bag of ice. “Thank you.” She said as she gingerly placed the ice on her cheek. “And please don’t call me that.” She added once he sat back down.

“What?” 

“Sweetheart. Please don’t call me that.” She let out a little breath as the ice stopped stinging and made her skin numb. She didn’t look over at Ben.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered and looked down at his hands in his lap. 

They waited for about another hour before Ellie’s name was called. They followed the nurse to an examination room and Ellie sat on the exam table while Ben sat in a chair next to her. The nurse took her blood pressure and asked a few basic questions about any previous medical conditions. After a few minutes the a doctor came in. He was a kind looking older man who immediately became concerned when he saw Ellie’s face and he gave a stern look to Ben.

“What happened young lady?” He asked abruptly. “Would you like this gentleman to leave so you and I can talk in private?”

“No.” Ellie replied a bit confused. Then she put it together. “Oh! No! No! he didn’t do this. He gave me a ride to hospital. I was mugged.” She explained in a rush.

The doctor looked at her for a few seconds and then decided she was telling the truth. “I’m so sorry about the confusion. But you must understand it isn’t uncommon in my line of work.” He walked over to the table and looked at Ellie’s cheek. “Ok let’s take a look at you.”


	6. Chapter 6

A short while later they were walking towards Ben’s car with a bandage across the line of Ellie’s cheek and prescription for painkillers in her purse. Ben walked to the passenger side and held the door for her to get in. He went around to his side and climbed in. A few minutes into the drive Ben broke the silence.

“Ellie can…” He cleared his throat and started again. “Can we talk?”

“Please Ben. I’m so tired. And my entire head and face hurt terribly.” She let out a groan and leaned her head back against the headrest. “I just want to go to sleep.”

“Alright.” Ben let out a sigh. A few minutes later they pulled up in front of Ben’s building and he found a place to park. He turned off the engine and opened his door.

“What are we doing here Ben?” She asked in a tired voice. He turned to look at her. “Why didn’t you take me to my flat?”

“You heard what the doctor said. You have to be under observation for the next few hours. You have a concussion; you can’t be alone tonight.” And with that he got out and closed the door. While he was walking around to Ellie’s side she thought about locking the doors, just having that childish thought made her burst out into laughter. When Ben opened her door she was still giggling. He knelt down quickly. He reached for her neck and looked at her, as though he could find out if she was having some sort of episode through her eyes. “Are you alright?” 

After a few moments she quieted down and nodded. “I’m fine.” She grabbed her bag and climbed out of the car. Ben followed her and held the door to his building open for her. Once they were inside Ellie turned to Ben before he could push the button for the lift. “Really. I’ll call Alice and stay with her. It’s fine.”

“Please Ellie. Let me do this for you. If you’re uncomfortable call Alice and have her come stay here. Please.” He pleaded with her. He watched as she took a deep breath and then she pushed the button herself. “Thank you.”

They rode the lift together in silence and walked to Ben’s door. He opened the door and held it for Ellie to walk in. He turned on the lights and followed her into the living room. He winced as he saw her eyes land on the couch and stay there. He walked into the kitchen to distract himself. 

“I’m going to put the kettle on. Would you like something to eat? I can fix you something.” He called out from the kitchen. After a few seconds he didn’t hear anything so he looked over the counter to see if she was ok. At first he didn’t see her, but then he looked further and saw her starting to climb the stairs. 

“God damnit!” He yelled and he threw the towel down and jogged over to her. “Jesus, Ellie, you could’ve waited for me. You could get dizzy and fall.” He placed his hand on her lower back and followed her up. “Are you sure you should even be climbing the stairs right now? I could make out the sofa or something, that way-” He cut himself off immediately. As soon as he said sofa Ellie paused and he felt her tense up for a moment and then continue walking.

As they reached the next landing she started walking down the corridor. When she passed the first door Ben didn’t understand. “Ellie where are you going?” She didn’t answer him, just kept walking. Finally she opened the door to his guest room. “Don’t be silly darling…” She gave him a stern look, “Sorry...but really you can’t sleep here. I’ve never cleared it out or gotten a good bed or anything.” He babbled on. 

“It’s fine.” Ellie said in an empty voice. She moved the boxes he had piled on the small twin bed and started knocking the dust off the mattress.

“Ellie please. You can’t be serious. Sleep in my bed, I won’t be sleeping much tonight anyways. I can nap downstairs.”

“You wanted me to stay so I’m staying. I’ll sleep here.” She said as she crossed her arms over her chest and looked at him. “Do you have a sheet and a spare blanket?”

Ben opened and closed his mouth a few times and finally slumped his shoulders and nodded. “Back in a mo’.” He went out to the linen cupboard and dug out a sheet and a few blankets. He then walked down the way to his room and grabbed all of his pillows. He walked back into the guest room to see Ellie sitting on the edge of the bed. “Here we are.” He set all the things down and motioned for her to stand up.

“I can do it Ben.”

“Don’t be silly.” He made up the bed and placed all of the pillows at the head. He straightened up and turned to face her. “Alright Dar- Ellie. For the first three hours I have to wake you up every hour to make sure you’re ok. After that I’ll just come by occasionally and check in on you.” He looked at her dirty clothes. “Let me get you something to wear.”

“No. I’m fine. Goodnight.” And with that she climbed into the bed and rolled onto her side away from him. He looked at her again and clicked the light off and shut the door.

He set his alarm and every hour he went upstairs to wake her up. He asked her simple questions like what year was she born and what the date was. She seemed to be fine. So he went into his own room and got settled in to grab some sleep. As he pulled on his pajamas he heard screaming from the other room. He ran into the guest room and saw Ellie sitting up on the bed crying. 

“Ellie, sweetheart are you alright?” He looked around the room as though something could be hiding to hurt her. “What is it?”

“Nightmare.” She was sobbing hysterically now, she could hardly catch her breath.

Ben crossed the room and sat next to her in the bed. Ellie threw her arms around his neck and sobbed into his shoulder. He tensed at first and then relaxed and wrapped his arms tightly around her. He smoothed the hair back from her face and brushed his fingers through the hair down her back. He continued to slowly comb through her hair, he remembered how this used to soothe her. “It’s alright darling. I’m here. No one will hurt you. Shh...take deep breaths. That’s it.” He cooed softly in her ear. After a few minutes she started to calm down. “What was it about? Do you want to talk about it?” He asked her quietly.

“I was back on that street. And...and...and he was chasing me.” She was trying to take deep breaths. “I was so afraid Ben. I’m so stupid I should have been more aware. I should’ve called a cab. I should carry cash, maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad.” 

“Enough of that.” Ben interrupted her musings. “There was nothing you did wrong. An asshole took your things and hit you. It will all be ok. In the morning we will go over what was in you wallet and get all of your cards and such replaced. It’s all ok. You’re safe here. I’ve got you.”

“What if I have the dream again? I’m too afraid to close my eyes Ben.” She never took her face away from his neck when she said all this. “Ben I’m so afraid.”

“Come stay with me tonight. I’ll keep the nightmares away. I’m a professional.” He said into her ear. praying she would say yes. He couldn’t give up the feeling of her in his arms , not that easily. He was so caught up in his thoughts he almost didn’t hear her answer.

“Ok.”

So Ben took Ellie’s hand and led her down to his room. They went to the bed and Ben stopped and looked at her.

“Let me get you something to sleep in. Please my darling, you must be so uncomfortable.” When she nodded he went to the dresser and dug out a shirt and some flannel pants. He handed the clothes to her and she went into the bathroom to change. He stayed where he was and run a hand through his hair. Christ, he hadn’t had her this close in so long. He couldn’t stop the butterflies in his stomach. He remembered the pillows and ran to get them from the other room. 

When Ellie came out of the bathroom she had changed, and washed her face a bit. The swelling wasn’t as bad as it had been but it was already starting to turn a deep blue and purple. She climbed into the bed next to him and pulled the covers up over her shoulders. He leaned over and turned the light off. After a few minutes he couldn’t take it anymore. He reached across the bed and pulled her back firmly into his chest. He gave a soft kiss to the top of her head.

 

“Goodnight Ellie.” He whispered into her hair.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning Ben woke up and stretched. When he didn’t feel anyone next to him he panicked and sat straight up. Looking around the room he quickly threw back the covers and jumped out of bed. What if she left while he was still asleep? “Shit. Shit. Shit.” He tore open the bedroom door and ran down the stairs. He started to run to the front door when he heard a noise coming from the kitchen. He walked to the doorway and saw Ellie pouring herself a cup of tea. She looked up at him when he walked in. 

“I thought you left.” He told her in a quiet voice.

“No.” She replied and sat down at the counter.

Ben got a mug out for himself and made himself some tea. He didn’t sit down but leaned on the counter across from Ellie. He looked at her face while she looked down at the tiles of the counter. Her eye wasn’t swollen but she had a hell of a shiner across her cheek and up the side of her face. 

“Your cheek looks much better. How do you feel? How is your head?” 

“I feel like I have the worst hangover without the nausea.” 

“Good. Good.” He shuffled his right foot on the floor. “Do you remember what was in your wallet? I can help you make a list and we can make some calls to get your cards cancelled and reissued.”

“All my paperwork is at my place. I’m going to head home now.” She took one last drink and stood up. “I’m going to wear this home and I’ll send them back to you. Thank you for everything last night. Good bye Ben.” She started walking towards the front door.

“Let me drive you home.”

“No thank you.”

“Ellie, please let me take you home. Please.”

“Ben. Stop. This isn’t going to fix anything. I know you want to do this to make yourself feel better about everything-”

“That’s not it at all!” Ben cut in. “Please Ellie, this isn’t about how I feel. I just want to help you however I can.”

“Stop it! Just stop!” She clenched her hands at her side. “You lost the right to take care of me! I lost my ability to lean on you for support. It’s done. It’s over.”

“Ellie I’m so sorry. Please let me explain.” He begged her.

“Alright.” Ellie stood up straight and looked him in the eyes. “Tell me what I’ve done to deserve this.”

Ben took a breath and tried to keep his hands from shaking. “Nothing.” He said quietly, his eyes trained on the floor at his feet. “You never did anything wrong. You did nothing but be there for me. And I behaved like an ass because I was afraid.”

Ellie let out a sob and slid down the wall to sit on the floor. Ben rushed to look at her but saw she looked exhausted and heart broken; but probably the strongest he had ever seen her. 

“Ellie. I was so terrified of what was happening between us that I did what I knew would change everything. Nothing happened between that woman and myself.”

Ellie let out a bitter laugh at the end his sentence. 

“Well, besides the kissing, I told her to leave almost immediately. We didn’t go any farther. Not once...not once I realized that I didn’t want her. I wanted you. And that I never want to be without you again. That is why I have been trying to help you. These last few hours were some of the worst and best in my entire life. I was torn between dropping you off at the hospital and finding the man who hit you and beating him with my bare hands and staying with you to make sure you would be alright. I was so out of my mind with happiness because I could be there for you. I could hold you and care for you and worry over you. Like I should have always been doing.”

At this Ellie started crying and pulled her knees to her chest and hid her face in her arms. Ben dropped to his knees in front of her. 

“I absolutely do not deserve it. But could you please think about giving me another chance.” 

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t need to know right now. I just want you to know how I feel. Let me take you home.” He held his breath while he waited for her answer.

“Ok.”

He let out a sigh of relief. “I’ll just go grab some jeans. I’ll be right back.” He ran upstairs and changed as fast as he could. He tripped twice trying to pull his jeans up. He ran back downstairs and grabbed his keys. He thanked God when he saw Ellie waiting for him by the door. He held the door for her and followed her to the lift.

A while later he pulled up in front of her building. As he started to open his door she put her hand on his arm.

“Don’t get out. I’m fine to walk in myself. Thank you Ben.” And she jumped out of the car and went into her building.

Once he saw her light come on in the living room window, he pulled away from the curb and headed back to his own flat.

\----

Ellie took Monday off from work and decided to come back in on Tuesday. When she opened her door to leave on Tuesday morning there was another letter on her doormat. She put it in her bag and headed to her office. The first two hours at work was a flood of people stopping by her desk to ask what happened. Eventually it seemed as though every single person in the entire office was aware of her highly eventful weekend. 

After a long day at work, her head was throbbing and she was looking forward to a night at home with an ice pack on her cheek. She walked home and once again, there was a letter on her doormat. She leaned down and picked it up. After she set her things down she took the other letter out of her bag and put both of them in her book on her shelf. 

She was rather surprised that he was still leaving her these letters. After Saturday night and Sunday morning, she assumed he would be pursuing other options. Maybe he would start to leave her alone. If he gave her some space then she might have a chance of patching up her broken heart and pretend that this had never happened. But she was terrified that if he was around her then she might let her weakness for him get the best of her, and she would let him back into her life. 

While she was pacing around the living room and trying to come to some sort of a decision, her doorbell rang. She crossed the room and opened the door to see Ben standing there with a bouquet of a variety of colorful flowers. 

“Ben.” 

“Ellie, how are you?” He asked and he looked over at her cheek, “The bruising seems much better. I’m glad.”

“I’m alright, thank you. Can I help you?” She asked politely.

“No, no. I just stopped by to check on you. These are for you.” He handed the flowers over to her and smiled. “Call me if there is anything I can get for you, please don’t hesitate.” 

When Ellie took the flowers from him he smiled again and turned to walk to the staircase. “Thank you Ben.”

“Of course. Have a good night.” He smiled and waved to her, and then headed down the stairs to the street.

When he disappeared from her view she slowly closed the door. She went to the window and looked down to the sidewalk, making sure she was out of sight of course. She saw him walk out and put his hands in his pockets and head down the street. 

What on earth was she supposed to make of that. She looked down and realized that she was still holding the flowers in her arms. She went into the kitchen and got out a vase. Once she put the flowers together in the water she gave them a good look. They were beautiful. She was glad he hadn’t gone with roses. They were a beautiful mix of colorful wildflowers. She placed the vase in the center of her counter and smiled.


	8. Chapter 8

For the rest of the week she went to and from work and it was the same as last week. She still had letters on her doorstep everyday but she didn’t hear from Ben again. On Friday she did have a surprise guest. At about 10 at night there was a sudden pounding on her door. Startled she walked to the door and jumped back when the knocking started again.

“Wh-who is it?” She asked through the door. She tried to get her shaking fingers into her pocket to get out her mobile. 

“Eleanor open the damn door!” Tom yelled through the closed door. She unlocked the door and had barely turned the door knob when Tom burst through the door. She took several steps back and tried to put the kitchen counter between her and the furious man who was stalking back and forth in her living room. 

“What the hell happened? Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you call me?” He yelled in her direction. When he shot a glance at Ellie he stopped immediately. She was shaking in the kitchen and had her arms wrapped tightly around herself as she followed his movements with her eyes.

He stopped and slowly raised his hands, palms facing her, in the air. “I’m sorry darling.” He slowly walked towards her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Are you alright?” He walked to her and wrapped his arms around her. He held her tightly to her chest and kissed the top of her head.

“I’m sorry Ellie. I’m so, so, sorry.” He cooed into her hair. When she stopped shaking he slowly loosed his hold and held her back from him a few inches so he could see her face. He raised his right index finger and slowly and gently touched the edge of the bruise on the side of her face. He leaned down and put a light kiss on the corner of her eyebrow. 

“Are you alright?” He whispered to her.

“I’m fine Tom. Truly.” She smiled slowly at him and turned to the sink and started to fill the kettle with water from the faucet.

He leaned back against the counter and watched her movements. “Why didn’t you call me darling?”

“I actually...I called Ben.” She busied herself by turning on the cooker and placing the kettle carefully on the burner. “He came and got me and took me to hospital.”

“Did you?” He looked surprised and a little relieved by this news.

“Wait, if he didn’t tell you then how did you know?” She asked him, completely confused.

“He told me you had been mugged and got hurt. He didn’t tell me that he was the one who took care of you.” He tried to hide his smile when she glared at him.

“Tom. The man hit me and my head hit the wall behind me. I woke up after a while and I didn’t know where I was or what exactly had happened. I called the first person I thought of. Stop smiling like that!” She yelled at him when he started grinning, and she tried really hard to hide her own smile.

“He was your first instinct?” He asked slyly. His demeanor changed suddenly and looked at Ellie seriously. “Can we talk about this?”

“Tom, I really don’t-”

“Ellie I know you don’t, but maybe I can help. I know you both rather well. Let’s talk.” 

“It’s the middle of the night , don’t you have somewhere you should be? Or somewhere you need to be early in the morning?”

“Nope.” He popped the ‘p’ in the word. 

“Why are you here anyways?” 

“Ben said you were hurt last weekend and that it would take a while for you to feel better. So I came over.”

“You barged over.” Ellie said while rolling her eyes.

“Either way, here I am. What the hell happened?”

“I was out and I got mugged. I didn’t have any money in my wallet and the guy got mad. He hit me and that's the last I remember.”

“Oh Ellie, let me see the your head, are you alright? Can I get you anything?” He reached for her face and turned her so he could look at the skin under her hair.

“I’m fine. Honestly. I have some bumps and bruises, but I’ll survive.” She moved around the kitchen and poured them both a cup of tea.

“Did you call the police?”

“I did the morning after. I filed a report but they said it’s rather unlikely that they’ll catch the guy.” She placed a cup in front of him.

“Alright. So you called Ben.”

“I called Ben.”

“And…” He looked at her expectantly.

“And that’s that.” 

“Are you going to talk to him again?” 

“He came by the other night and brought me flowers.” She nodded at the vase in front of them on the counter. He looked at the flowers and back to her. “He asked me how I was, told me to call him if there is anything I need, handed me the flowers and left.”

“Interesting.” He rubbed his chin while he thought this over. “What do you think?”

“I don’t know Tom. But that’s the thing, he told me I didn’t need to know right now.”

Tom smiled and looked down at his tea.

“What?” She asked.

“He’s stepping up. He’s trying to be the best man he can be for you.” He touched her arm when she started to get up from her seat. “No, he is. Just let him try, see where it goes.”

“Maybe.” 

\-----

Ellie began taking all of her work home with her. She had piles upon piles of manuscripts sitting on her coffee table, her night stand and her kitchen counter. She read through every single page of these works and then read them again. When she used to be able to glance through an idea once, and decide if it would be a success or a failure; she second guessed herself, and then triple guessed herself. 

She stayed up late at night and read the same starting sentences that she had read a thousand times. When she used to be able to simply cross the title out and move on, she doubted her ability. What if this would be different? What if these words would change everything? Every single story made her doubt what she thought she knew.

So Ellie stopped sleeping at night. She would catch some naps throughout the day and skip lunch to sleep. Being alone became terrifying. Every night she walked home she couldn’t enjoy herself. She looked over her shoulder a thousand times between work and home. Ellie used to love her walks home because she could feel what it was like living in London, enjoying the feel of walking the old streets and seeing the people around her. Now she didn’t trust anyone, anyone who looked at her for too long she walked faster and tried her best to get home quickly.

Ellie stopped spending time outside. She went to work, did her shopping and stayed in her flat. She re-read every single book pitch she had and then got out of bed and read it again. 

During the week she had talked to a few of her friends and tried reading some of her new books. Every day after work there was, without fail, a letter on her door step. She still didn’t want to read them but she liked the consistency of it, something hadn’t changed for her. 

On Thursday she went through her tasks like a zombie. She returned phone calls and emails, she met with her executive publisher and discussed the different projects she was working on and what was up and coming within the next month. February was always a big month for her company, their popular authors always seemed to begin a new project at the start of the year, and they seemed to get an influx of new manuscripts from all over.

When it was finally time for Ellie to go home she had a large stack of manuscripts in her satchel to read later that night. She put on her coat and scarf and grabbed up her satchel and purse and headed downstairs to the main lobby. 

When she started to open the door to the outside of the building there was a hand holding it open above her head. Startled, she turned around suddenly and hit Benedict square in the chest.

“Oh my God,” She let out in a sharp breath, “You scared me!” 

“Sorry, I didn’t want to scare you.” He looked behind him and saw the people trying to go around them. “Here let’s get out of the way.” He gestured for her to move out onto the sidewalk. They stepped out onto the pavement and away from the bustling crowd.

“What are you doing here?” Ellie asked.

“Here, I got you a hot chocolate. It’s freezing out here.” He didn’t answer her question, only handed over the warm cup.

“Thank you.” She said automatically. “Ben. What are you doing here?”

“I thought I’d walk you home, I was in the area.” He reached for the strap of the satchel on her shoulder. “Let me take that.”

Ellie took a step back. “Don’t lie to me. My office is never ‘in your area’. Why are you here?” 

“I wanted to walk you home. I won’t say a word if you don’t want me to. I just wanted to keep you company.” He held out a hand for her bag. “I know that must be heavy, please, it’s the least I can do.”

They stared at each other for a few moments until finally Ellie let out a sigh and handed her bag over to Ben. “Thank you.”

They started walking down the street towards Ellie’s flat. She took a sip of her chocolate and gave a little smile. “This is really good, thank you again.”

“It’s your favorite.” He replied simply. “How does your head feel? You can hardly see the mark anymore.”

“It’s fine, doesn’t hurt to touch it anymore.” 

“Ellie, are you in a hurry?” Ben asked a bit confused.

“No, why?”

“Why are we walking so fast? This isn’t like you. Why don’t you slow down a bit, you must be exhausted from work all day.”

“I’m fi-”

“Stop saying you’re fine!” He snapped at her. Immediately he regretted what he said. She didn’t say anything in response and after another minute he broke the silence. “I’m sorry Ellie, I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s alright.” She said quietly, but she slowed down to a more comfortable walking speed. After a few minutes passed she let out a breath. Looking straight ahead she tried to explain it to him. “I don’t like to walk alone so I try and get home as quick as possible.”

Ben didn’t know what to say. He knew why she felt this way, after being attacked the way she was of course she was afraid of being alone on the street. If he could have it his way he would walk her to and from work everyday, and if he couldn’t he would hire her a car. However, he knew this was wishful thinking on his part, Ellie would never allow it; not even when they were together as a couple. So how to fix this?

“I told you it was nothing, I’m being silly.” Ellie said after Ben was quiet for a few minutes.

“Don’t be ridiculous. You have every right to feel the way you do.” He touched her arm briefly and then put his hand back down at his side. “Can I help at all?”

“I don’t see how.” 

“Can I walk you home tomorrow?” 

“Ben, I don’t know.” She was actually enjoying the easy way they were able to be together. She just still hadn’t decided if she wanted him back in her life. And having him around her made her forget every reason she had to keep him away. She did have a good question for him at the moment, hopefully that would sidetrack him. “Why are you giving me letters every day?”

Ben stopped walking for a moment, completely taken by surprise, and then jogged a little to catch back up. “You’re not reading them?”

“Why do you think that?”

“I think if you had been reading them then you would know why.” He said with a shrug of his shoulders.

“What’s in them and why are you still sending them?” 

“It gives me a chance to talk to you.”

“But…” She started to say she wasn’t talking to him and decided to let it go. 

They walked in silence for the rest of the way to Ellie’s building. They walked up the few stairs to the lobby door and Ben held it open for her. He handed back her satchel and gave her a small, hesitant smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” He asked hopefully.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night.” She said and disappeared up the stairs to her flat.


	9. Chapter 9

When Ben got to his flat he couldn’t contain his happiness. She let him spend some time with her, and he would see her tomorrow. 

Thank God!

He walked around his flat and thought about trying to study his script but he was so excited that he couldn’t sit still. 

When he spent the afternoon in the lobby of her building he figured it was a fifty-fifty chance that she would let him walk with her. So he waited and read. When he saw her coming out of the elevator he paused for a moment. She was so beautiful, she looked a little tired but that was probably from work. He always loved those wonderful pencil skirts she wore with her blouses, but right now all he could see was her wool coat and one of her brightly colored scarves wrapped around her neck. The bag over her shoulder looked like it was tremendously heavy and he didn’t want her to carry it for one second longer than she had to. After their small standoff on the sidewalk she had agreed. The next few minutes felt like some of the best hours of his life.

He didn’t like knowing that she was afraid of being alone on the street. She used to spend hours walking alone around London. She always said that was one of her favorite things about living in the city, walking around and feeling the town. But it had only been a short amount of time since that horrible night. Thank God there weren’t any visible scars from that bastard. 

So if walking with her made her feel safer he would move everything to be able to. After leaving his daily letter on Ellie’s doorstep he headed back to his place. He knew she expected him the next afternoon so he had plenty of time to come up with a plan.

\----

The next morning was the same as every other morning. She got dressed and got her things together. She tried to tell herself that she felt better that morning because it was Friday, not because she would see Ben that night. She put some mascara on quickly and yanked on her coat and scarf. When she opened the door there was a letter on her mat. ‘How is he doing this?’ She laughed to herself and tucked the envelope into her purse. She walked down the stairs and when she left the lobby and walked down the stairs to the sidewalk she came to an abrupt stop. 

“What on Earth are you doing here?” She asked incredulously. Ben was leaning on the wall next to her stairs holding two cups of coffee.

“Good morning!” He replied brightly and held out one of the cups for Ellie to take. “Ready?”

“You said you wanted to walk me home, not from home.” She said as she started walking without waiting for him to catch up. With his long legs he was right next to her without a pause.

“You said you would see me tomorrow. And here I am.” He said with a huge smile on his face. He gently took the satchel from her shoulder and she let him take it.

“Don’t you have work or something important you should be doing?” She grumbled as she dug her mouth and nose into her scarf to protect her from the biting cold of the early morning.

“I am doing something important.” 

“Something work related.”

“Later. How was your night?” He asked as they walked.

“Fine.” She didn’t offer any more information so they walked along in silence. “How is it going with filming”

“Better actually, I was having trouble memorizing my lines but things have turned around for me.” 

“That’s good. I don’t know how you can keep that much in your head at one time.” She mused.

“I don’t know how you can read so many books in a day.” He countered.

“Yeah, well…” She didn’t want to mention that it had been more and more difficult to trust her decisions.

“Did something happen at work?” 

“No, nothing like that. I just can’t seem to make the easy choices like I use to.”

“Oh.” He didn’t really know what to say to that. “Maybe I could help? I’m no where near as brilliant as you are, but I could read the really horrible ones and confirm that they are in fact terrible.”

“It’s alright. Thank you though.” 

“Why do you think you’re second guessing so much?” He asked casually. He placed his hand on her lower back to guide her across the street and up onto the other sidewalk, he lowered his hand and they kept walking. After a few more steps he realized they had slipped into an old habit and neither of them did anything to change it. 

“I don’t know. A lot of what I thought I knew for certain has disappeared.” She took a drink of coffee and mused out loud, “I think I probably don’t have the best judgment.” 

Ben cringed at those words, but he didn’t know what to say to that. They had reached Ellie’s office. She stopped and turned to face him just as they reached the entrance. 

“You are one of the smartest people I know and I would never doubt your judgment for one second.” He started to raise his hand up to her cheek and then thought better of it. “It’s Friday. Go up there and enjoy yourself. Trust your instincts and remember that you’re doing this because you love it.”

He gave her a sweet smile and then nodded to the building for her to go inside. “It’s too cold out here, get inside and warm up.”

She smiled back at him. “Thank you. Have a good day at work and don’t worry about coming back tonight.” She turned to open the door and he had already beaten her to it and was holding it open for her.

“I’ll see you in a few hours.” He said quietly as she passed him. As she took a few steps into the lobby he called out to her, “And no working from home this weekend.” 

When she turned to reply he had let the door close and was starting the walk back to his flat.

\----

When he got to the filming location for that afternoon he walked into the makeup trailer and saw that Martin and Amanda were already in chairs. ‘So it begins...’ he thought as he sat down specifically next to Amanda and not Martin. 

“Well?” She asked, she had her eyes closed while the makeup artist put some sort of powder over her face.

“How did you even know I was here?” Ben asked with a huff and tried to comfortable, maybe he should have chosen Martin after all.

“Please.” She replied. After another few moments, “I’m waiting.”

“It went well, it’s nice to be with her again. She’s having a tough time with her work so I tried to talk to her about it.”

“She should come by, the kids miss her terribly.” Amanda replied. When she opened her eyes she studied Ben in the mirror. “You look a hundred times better, you’ll have to work twice as hard to be cold and unapproachable on camera.”

“I’ve missed Ellie so much. I always forget until I’m with her and the pain in my chest stops hurting.”

There was silence in the trailer and when the make up artist put the final touches of mascara, Amanda got ready to leave. She gave a quick kiss to Ben’s forehead and another peck to Martin’s lips and she slipped out. A PA poked his head in the door and asked for someone to come to the set to have a quick look at the bright lighting for the scene. Alone, Ben and Martin sat in silence for a minute. When Ben leaned forward to take a drink of water, Martin sat up.

“Are you ever going to tell me what the fuck happened?” He asked.

“Please Martin, I know I fucked up. I know that, but I can’t stand to explain it anymore.”

“Is it something Ellie did? Is that why she won’t come to the house anymore?” He turned to face Ben. “You’re such a good man, did she do something? It’s been weeks and I can’t think of what could have happened. I thought you both were so happy together.”

“Martin. Stop, it was me, I did something. I don’t think Ellie is even possible of doing something wrong. I messed up and now I’m trying to make it right.” 

“Alright. I’ll leave it.” he leaned back in his seat. “Just remember I’m here if you need me, and I’ve certainly done my share of cock ups. Now get to work you ass.”

Ben smiled and closed his eyes and put his headphones in his ears. He turned the music up and tried to go over his lines for the next few scenes.

Filming went really well. Better than it had been in weeks, and he would never say it out loud but he assumed it was because he seemed to be in a better place. He rushed to wash his face and change his clothes. He was off location and headed to Ellie’s building before anyone even realized he had left. He stopped and got a bottle of some of Ellie’s favorite wine and waited in the lobby for her to come downstairs. 

\---

Ellie’s day seemed to have gone phenomenally better than it had in quite a while. For some reason the books she worked on all seemed to be subjects she enjoyed and she was able to quickly decide against a few that were a little too unoriginal to be moved any further. She had found one book that she desperately wanted to help push forward into publishing and hopefully get this unknown author a foothold in the literacy community.

She packed up a handful of manuscripts to go over later that night and a few reports she hadn’t finished just yet. She stood up and turned off her desk lamp and put on her coat and scarf. She grabbed her purse and as she reached for her satchel she paused for a moment. Ben’s words this morning rang in her ears, did she really need to bring these with her? Surely they could wait for Monday morning. 

So she walked to the elevator carrying only her purse over her shoulder. When she stepped out into the lobby she couldn’t stop her eyes from flickering over the faces of the people around her. They stopped almost instantly on the tall man standing near the door. Ben was holding a small bag and smiling at her. When she walked up to him he glanced at her shoulders and when he noticed the absence of her heavy work bag his smile turned into a grin. He turned and held the door open for her and they walked out.

“How was work today?” He asked her.

“Better actually. I’ve found a project I really enjoy. I think the author might really be something new.”

“That’s wonderful. What’s it about? Can you tell me yet?” 

“Not until I’ve discussed it with my EP but I think it really has potential.” She turned and smiled and him.

Ben’s heart skipped a beat as he looked down at her and smiled back. She hadn’t looked at him like that in so long. They walked for a bit longer and then she looked back up at him.

“How was filming?”

“Very good. Both Martin and Amanda were on location today. Together they are a force to be reckoned with.” He turned to her slightly, “They ask about you constantly. Amanda wanted to know if you could come to the house soon.”

“Oh that’s very sweet of her.” Ellie said but didn’t make a commitment one way or the other. 

“What are your plans for the weekend?” He asked.

“Alice is finally back in the country tomorrow. She’s been gone forever so I’m sure she will have hours of gossip to catch me up on. Other than that, nothing really.” She shrugged her shoulders, “What about you?”

“We have to film on Saturday night and then all of next week so I’ll probably try to get used to staying up nights, not days.”

“I would be terrible at that. As it is I’ve had a hard time trying to get used to it lately.”

Ben frowned at her, “What do you mean?”

“Nothing really, I’m fin-” She stopped when she saw him give her a sharp look. She let out a breath, “I haven’t been sleeping.”

They walked for a bit. “Do you want to talk about it?” He asked her quietly.

“I just haven’t been all that great. When I sleep I wake back up, so most nights I don’t bother trying and I work instead.”

“Are you busy tonight?” He asked her, changing the topic a bit. 

“No, why?” 

“Let’s do something.” He said excitedly.

“Ben, it’s been a long week and don’t think that’s such a good idea…” She started to say.

“No, no, no. Listen. I have a plan.” 

“Aren’t you tired?” She asked him with a weak smile.

“Not with you! Come on, I haven’t been out in ages, we can blow off some steam and just have a fun time.” He was almost bouncing on the sidewalk.

By now they had reached her apartment. She stopped and considered him for a moment, he was grinning at her and his eyes were bright with excitement. She turned and looked up at her dark but comfy flat waiting for her upstairs.

“What is it with you boys?” She asked exasperated. And she turned and walked up to the door to her building. When Ben didn’t reach for the door before her she turned to look behind her in surprise. He was looking down at the pavement and when he raised his head to look at her his shoulders were slumped. 

“Are you coming up?” She asked him. His face lit up and he bound up the stairs and grabbed the door for her.


	10. Chapter 10

When Ellie unlocked her door she let the both of them in and flipped on a few lights. She took off her heavy coat and scarf and hung them by the door. Ben glanced at her and quickly looked away when he saw her business attire. She may not think so but he thought she was the sexiest woman he had ever seen. He didn’t think he had a kink for women in skirts and glasses, until he had met Ellie that is.

“Just let me change and then we can head out.” She called out as she disappeared into her bedroom. 

It felt like a lifetime since Ben had been in this flat. It hadn’t changed much but he did notice the piles of paperwork on most of the surfaces. She really was taking all of her work home with her. He walked to the counter and placed the bag onto the surface and walked to the bookshelf. As he glanced through some of her new titles he noticed a book with the pages hardly able to close. This was the book Tom had said she was keeping the letters in. He didn’t dare touch it so he moved on to look at some of the other books on the shelf.

“I’m just going to wear this.” Ellie announced as she walked back in the room. Ben turned to look at her and had to work to keep his mouth closed. She had on a pair of tight jeans that disappeared into boots that covered her calves almost to her knees. She was also wearing a deep blue, form fitting jumper. 

He cleared his throat twice before he could answer her. “You look nice.” He watched as she walked to get her coat.

“What’s in the bag?” She asked as she nodded to the bag he had placed on the counter.

“Just some wine, I thought you might like it after a long week of work.” He shrugged and moved to hold her coat for her to put on.

“Thank you, that was thoughtful.” She replied as she pulled the coat up over her shoulders. “Ready?”

He nodded and opened the door for her.

Out on the street again Ellie turned to look at Ben. “Well?” He looked at her a bit confused. “You said you had a plan for tonight?”

“Right! Yes! Let’s go.” He caught on quickly. He made to reach for her hand and at the last minute he reached for the crook of her elbow. “On we go.” He led her down the street to one of the large cross roads and raised his hand for a cab.

As they climbed in she turned to look at him, “Where are we going?” 

“To get drunk.” 

“Ben, I don’t know if, dammit Ben-” She was flustered and beginning to regret her decision to go with him on this ridiculous venture.

“Ellie. Let’s go have some beer and just let go.” He looked over at her and saw her building up her mental walls. “Ellie, I can’t really let go with anyone but you. And you will always be safe with me. Always.” He took her hands in his and looked in her eyes. “Let’s go to a pub, have some beer and play some darts. Let’s let go, just forget you and me, and everything. Let’s go have some friendly competition.” 

“I’ve always been terrible at darts.” She reasoned.

“And I’m sorry that you’re going to lose miserably, maybe if you tried harder?” He joked. They rode along until he remembered something he wanted to ask her. “What did you mean when you said ‘you boys’?”

They had just pulled up to the pub Ben had picked, as Ellie climbed out of the cab she turned to face him. “You always seem to get what you want.” She said as she touched the tip of his nose with her finger. And with that she turned and walked into the pub without looking back.

Ben overpaid the cabbie and almost fell out of the cab to chase after his woman. When he went inside it was a little difficult to find her. The Church and Crown was much more crowded than he expected, but it was a Friday after all. He finally spotted her squeezed in between two groups at the bar while she was trying to order a drink. He moved up behind her and motioned for the bar tender. 

“I hate you.” Ellie said as she glared up at him.

“You can’t hate me for being taller than you.” He said.

A few minutes later they had drinks in hand and a dartboard for them to monopolize. Ben took the whiskey sour from her and set it on the small table near them, he added his drink and then turned to face her. 

“I bought this round.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes at him. “Whoever wins this game has to buy the next round,” as Ellie started to agree he held up one finger, “and chips!” He declared.

“Ladies first.” He handed her the darts in his hand.

Two hours later, and after a few rounds Ellie throwing a fit. “Ben you are a son of a Bitch and you know you are lying! I bought the first two and since then you have lost every game. Pay your dues you bloody cheat!”

“I’m telling mother!”

“Oh shut it you Mamma’s boy, I want a Guinness with a whiskey, I’ll wait.” She made a show of leaning primly against the wall.

“Bloody ingrate. I taught you how to play the fucking game.” He shook his head at her with a smile and walked to the bar to buy another round.

He carried their drinks back to their table and saw Ellie wasn’t around. ‘Toilet’ He thought and waited for her to show. After a few minutes he started to worry. He walked back to where the toilets were and when he turned the corner he saw a man kissing Ellie. His heart stopped, he was frozen for the moment. When he went to turn away he saw that the man had Ellie pressed to the wall and her arms weren’t around his neck but pushed against his chest. Ben took his chances and intervened. He took two large steps towards them and slammed a his hand down on the man’s right shoulder and gave a big pull. 

When the man was separated from the love of Ben’s life, he turned to face Ben. 

“What the fuck man?” He asked while he wiped his mouth.

Ben ignored him and turned to face Ellie. She was shaking and she couldn’t get her eyes to settle on one person. Ben placed himself completely in front of her and looked into her eyes.

“Eleanor.” He said as he looked at her. When she focused on him he smiled briefly. “Hey you, what’s going on?”

He saw the spirit fire back in her eyes and she stood straight up and looked at the man over his shoulder. 

“Get the fuck away from me! I wasn’t teasing you, you ignorant asshole!” She yelled at the man in the hallway. 

“Whatever slut.” The man said and turned to walk away.

Before Ellie could react Ben turned and punched the man in the face. He fell down in the corridor and held his jaw while he looked up at Ben.

“Come along I think we’ve worn out our welcome.” Ben said and held out his hand to Ellie.

When the cool air hit them Ellie turned to talk to the extremely emotional man at her side. “Let’s head home.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” He said. He turned to her and looked at her with a calculating look. “How pissed are you?”

“I’m not quite that far just yet.” 

He nodded and hailed a cab. The next thing she knew they were walking into another pub.

“Ben, you’ve got to be kidding me”

“I still owe you from that last round.” He stated matter of factly.

Ellie found a table and sat to wait for her drink. When Ben showed up he had two Guinness and two Whiskeys. 

“Ben.” He didn’t answer her and he raised his whiskey in a toast. She set her glass down and stared at Ben until he looked back at her. “Ben. What the hell were you thinking, what was that?”

“I hit a man who was pushing himself on a woman, and then I bought a few drinks.”

“You can’t do that Benedict! You can’t make a scene, or make this some sort of scandal.” She shot her whiskey and started sipping her Guinness. She looked down at the table.

“Ellie.” She didn’t look up, He sighed, “I would have done the same thing for any woman I saw in the position you were in. I probably wouldn’t have punched the guy, but I would like to think that I would stand up for a woman in distress-”

“You are so goddamn old fashioned!” 

“That’s what makes me incredibly charming.” He said with a smirk. He finished his beer and looked at Ellie’s empty glass. “Another?”

“No, it’s late I should head out.” She said and started gathering her things. 

Ben stood and took her coat from her and held it for her to put on. He then followed her through the pub and held the door for her to walk out. 

“Christ it’s cold.” He exclaimed when the frigid air hit his face. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the cold. Come on, quickly. Lets grab a cab.” 

Without thinking he grabbed her hand and pulled her to the corner of the street. Ellie didn’t seem to mind, she simply jogged behind him and giggled. When they got a cab they practically fell into the back seat. They straightened themselves and laughed while the driver pulled away from the curb.

“Alright, I’m officially pissed.” Ellie said with a hiccup and a giggle.

Ben let out a deep laugh and nudged her with his shoulder. “You always were a light weight.” He saw her try to stifle a big yawn, which only made him laugh harder.

A few minutes into the ride she leaned her head onto his shoulder and looked at the buildings going by.

“I had a good time tonight. I needed that, thank you.” She said.

“I had a fun time too. Thanks for coming out with me.”

“Next time though no hitting random men in bars.” She said with a pretend frown.

“Deal.” He didn’t point out that she said there would be a next time but his heart leapt at those words.

A few minutes later they pulled up at Ellie’s building and she climbed out of the warm car with a sigh. Ben came out after her and looked down at her.

“Can I call you tomorrow? Maybe we could get lunch or something on Sunday?” He asked hesitantly.

She smiled at him. “Call me tomorrow. Thanks for tonight.” She stood on her tip toes and kissed his cheek. Then she turned and walked into her building, giving him a little wave at the door. 

Ben stood paralyzed, he hadn’t been expecting the kiss and it was a bit overwhelming to say the least. He waited until he saw her light turn on and then he got into the cab and headed home.


	11. Chapter 11

The next morning Ellie couldn’t bare to open her eyes. The sun seemed overly bright, annoyingly so. She reached blindly for the glass of water on her on her nightstand. She took a deep drink and laid back down. She cracked open one eye and looked for her mobile. She held the device above her face and checked the time. It was eight in the morning. She also had just received a text, that’s probably what woke her up she guessed. She opened it and saw it was from Ben.

‘how are you feeling this morning?’

She smiled and text him back. ‘Why did you let me have whiskey?’ She crawled out of bed and into the bathroom. She turned on the shower and when the water was cool but not freezing she climbed in. After her cold shower she felt that she could face the day. When she was getting dressed she checked her phone. 

‘I wouldn’t dream of withholding whiskey from you.’ 

She laughed and scrolled through her numbers and when she found the one she wanted she hit send.

“Why the hell are you calling me this early on a Saturday?” Alice grumbled into the receiver.

“I couldn’t wait, what are you doing today?” Ellie asked as she pulled on a jumper.

“Nothing planned, I haven’t even gotten out of bed yet.” 

“I’m coming over, I’ll bring breakfast.” She grabbed her purse and keys. “See you soon.” She hung up before Alice had a chance to reply.

Half an hour later Ellie had a box of food in one hand and was knocking on Alice’s door. A few minutes later a rumpled Alice pulled open the door. She didn’t say anything, only opened the door and turned back to the inside of the flat. Ellie laughed and walked in and shut and locked the door behind her. 

“How was Germany?” She called after Alice as they walked to the kitchen.

“Long. I hate being away from home this long.” She put the kettle on and turned back to Ellie. “Did I miss anything good?”

“Oh, a few things. Were the meetings successful at least?”

“I think so, Germans are so private that it’s hard to say sometimes. Go on, spill. Nothing exciting happened to me. Give me the gossip.”

“Well, on my way home from your place, the night before you left, I was…” She looked at Alice, “Don’t get mad. But I was mugged.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? I can’t believe I’m just hearing about this now!” Alice yelled. She looked Ellie over. “Were you hurt?”

“That’s the thing, he hit me and I was knocked unconscious. When I woke up I panicked...and...well I called Ben.”

“What? Why?”

“He’s always been the one I turned to, it was habit. Anyway, he came and got me and took me to hospital. After that I stayed at his place so he could keep an eye on me.”

“Oh Ellie, I would’ve helped you.” She walked around the counter and gave Ellie a big hug. “Alright, so a night at Mr. Cumberbatch’s. How was that?”

“You say that like I’ve never been there before.” Ellie said with a laugh. “He was really thoughtful, he was so worried.”

“Good.” 

Over the next hour Ellie explained all of Ben’s latest actions. Once Alice was up to date she turned to her. 

“What do you think?” Ellie asked.

“Well, men are idiots. But he seems to be sincere. He’s not pushing you, he’s letting you set the pace.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I rather like that.”

“I like that too.” 

“Has he called you yet?”

“No, he wants to do something tomorrow.”

“Are you going to say yes?” Alice asked with a smile.

“I think so.” Ellie said and a blush rose up in her cheeks.

The girls spent the rest of the morning laying around in the living room and watching movies. After lunch Ellie gave Alice a hug and headed back to her place.

\---

“Hello” Ellie answered her mobile later that afternoon.

“Does eleven work for you?” Ben asked without any preamble.

“Can’t you talk on the telephone like a normal human being?”

“You knew it was me, don’t be silly.” He grumbled.

“Weren’t able to sleep today?”

“I was up at 7. Tonight is going to be a complete horror.” He moaned in response. “Enough about my sleeping habits, lunch tomorrow?”

“You’ll want to sleep. It’s alright.”

“I’ve got to eat. After tonight I’ll need to keep up my strength. Come on…”

“Alright. Eleven it is.” She cast her mind about for a place to eat. “Where do you want to meet?”

“At yours.”

“I’m serious Ben.”

“As am I. I want to try this new place so I’ll pick you up.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll see you tomorrow. Good luck tonight.” She said with a little laugh.

“See you tomorrow.” 

\---

At 2 in the morning Benedict seemed to be especially forthcoming. 

“And so ever since that night I’ve been trying to win her back. Tom’s helping, well a bit, mostly he takes care of her when I can’t.” He explained as he paced in a small circle. “I love her so much, I’ll never give up on her, not ever.” 

Martin was sitting in a chair and watching Ben walk back and forth in front of him. They were waiting for the next scene to be set and they had a few minutes to take a break. Martin couldn’t wrap his mind around what he had just heard.

“You’re a fucking mad man.” 

“I know Martin. I get it, alright” He told him and he shoved his hands into his coat pocket to dig out a fag. “You wanted to know so I told you.”

“Alright so you’ve spent the last few weeks trying to, hold on, you love her?” 

“That’s what started this whole mess weren’t you listening?” Ben waved his cigarette in Martin’s direction.

“No you did, you started the mess.” Before Ben had a chance to respond Martin’s face lit up in a grin. “You’re in love.”

Ben stopped walking and turned to face Martin. “I am.”

“Right you bloody bastard, don’t cock it up again and you might have a chance with that gorgeous girl.”

“We’re having lunch in the morning.” Ben said with a grin of his own.

“Well that’s ridiculous.”

“You know what I meant.”

“Just tell her if you ever need a smack up the head to give me a ring.” Martin said as Ben turned to finish his cigarette. Ben didn’t stop, just raised his middle finger at Martin over his shoulder.

\----

At half after 9 Ben’s alarm went off. 

“Bloody fucking Christ.” He grumbled into his pillow and he slammed his hand down on his alarm. He lay there for a minute before climbing out of bed. He was going out on a date in a little over an hour. His heart was pounding and his hands were sweating a bit, Christ it was almost as though he was sixteen all over again. 

He rushed through his morning rituals and got ready to leave in a shocking amount of time. When he pressed the bell for Ellie’s flat it was ten to eleven.

“Who is it?” Ellie called through the closed door.

“Are you expecting someone else for lunch?” He replied, and then waited while he listened to her unlock the door and open it.

“You’re early, you’re never early.”

“You sound surprised. Are you ready?” He glanced down at her, she looked wonderful as usual. “I’m absolutely starving.”

“Let me get my things.” Ellie said and she turned to get her bag and coat. 

A little while later they were pulling up to a small cafe. Ellie waited as Ben paid the cabbie and they both went into the restaurant. Once they were seated and looking over a menu Ellie looked up at Ben. 

“You look terrible.” She said as she saw the dark circles under his eyes.

“It’s nice to see you too.” He quipped back with a frown, that didn’t last long at Ellie’s smirk. “It was a long night, the first night always seems to be full of tiny disasters.”

“Are you filming again tonight?”

“No, not until Monday night.”

“Ah, well you can have a bit of a lay in.”

“What are you getting?” He asked as he looked at her over his menu. 

The rest of the lunch was casual and easygoing. They caught up on small conversations about each other's friends and family, and work. Ben would be leaving in two weeks for a press tour for the hobbit so they chatted about the different places he was scheduled for.

Two hours later they stood in front of the door to the restaurant. 

“You want to walk a bit?” He asked her. When she nodded yes he held out his arm and she tucked her hand into his elbow. They walked a few blocks until they reached a tiny second hand bookstore. “Come on then.” He smiled and dragged her inside.

After an hour Ellie had sore neck from tilting her head to read the titles on the book spines, and an arm full of books to buy. Ben came up to her eventually and took the books from her. She blinked up at him like she had forgotten he was there and smiled back at him.

“Sorry, I get so distracted.” She said with a rueful grin.

“I’ve learned my lesson, I just have to come collect you after a while.” He said with a deep laugh. “Would you like to stay a bit longer? I was thinking I’d go next door for a coffee.” 

“I’ll come with you, if I stay any longer I’ll spend my rent money.” She followed him to the cashier and before she could argue he had given the clerk his credit card. When she started to explain that she was perfectly capable of buying these he wrapped his arm around her and covered her mouth with his hand while he signed the receipt with the other. The clerk laughed and put the books in a bag for them. 

They walked to the coffee shop and Ben watched as Ellie rolled her shoulders and neck.

“Too long at the wrong angle?” He asked with a chuckle. He put a hand around the back of her neck and massaged the muscles a bit. When she dropped her shoulders and let out a moan his entire body stiffened. That was a sound he had only been dreaming about lately. He slid his hand to the corner of her neck and his fingertips brushed over her collarbone. When they walked into the shop and into line, he let his hand drop back to his side.

They ordered their drinks and Ellie went to grab a table while Ben waited for the coffee. When he came back and sat down Ellie grabbed hers and took a big sip. 

“Mmm I love chocolate.” She exclaimed with a crazy grin on her face.

Ben laughed at her and took a sip of his own before he said, “God I’ve missed you.” He said it without thinking, just a response to her usual behavior. He froze, not sure what she would say to that. She looked down at the table for a heartbeat and then took another sip. 

“Did you get anything you liked? At the bookstore?” She asked.

“Nothing really, just read through a few things.”

They chatted a bit more and then headed out. Ben had the cab wait so he could walk Ellie to her door. Once she had unlocked it she turned to face him. 

“Ben,” he looked at her questioningly, “will you do something for me?”

“Anything.” He said without hesitating.

“Will you kiss me?”

He froze at these words. She wasn’t looking at him, her eyes were trained on the floor. He set the shopping bags at his feet and brought his hands to her face. He ran his left hand through her hair and cupped the back of her head, while his right rested on the side of her face. He tilted her face to look at him and he leaned in and lightly kissed the spot on her cheekbone where the bruise had been. He drew back a few millimeters and traced her lower lip with his thumb. Finally he met her lips with his. She opened her lips to kiss his bottom lip and he let out a sigh of relief. As Ellie brought her arms up around his neck, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him tightly. She broke the kiss with a gasp and started giggling. 

“Too tight.” She squeaked out.

He loosened his grip, but not much, and he leaned down to her ear. “Sorry. I’ve just missed you terribly.” He gave a kiss to the top of her ear and lightly touched it with his nose. When he let her go he looked at her to try and gage her reaction.

“Thank you.” She whispered and she gave him a shy smile. 

“Anytime.”

“Thank you for today. I had a very nice time.” She bent down and picked up the bags. “Good luck with filming this week. Go get some rest.”

“I’ll call you later?” He asked and she nodded and smiled. He smiled back and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. “Have a good night.” And he turned to walk down the stairs.


	12. Chapter 12

The next morning Ben was waiting to walk Ellie to work. When she came downstairs and saw him, she let out a gasp and lightly hit him on the shoulder. 

“What are you doing here? You should be getting some sleep! Aren’t you filming again tonight?”

“I’m working up to it. By the time I get back home I’ll be so exhausted from the walk that I will fall straight into bed.” He handed her the coffee he was holding. “Come along Fraser, don’t want to be late do you?”

“I hate you.” She mumbled and took a sip as they started walking. 

“Of course you don’t. I’m irresistible.” He wrapped his arm around his shoulder and they walked down the block.

The entire walk was filled with small talk and Ben gently touching Ellie every chance he got. They both had huge smiles on their faces by the time they reached her office. They stopped just before the entrance and turned to face each other. 

“Thank you for walking me, but don’t come back this afternoon.” When he started to protest she cut him off. “I’m serious, you’re working all night so you need to get ready and be at the set. I will be perfectly fine. Promise.”

“Will you call me when you get home at least?” He asked with furrowed brows.

“As soon as I walk through the door.” She smiled. Then she put her hands on his shoulders and stood on her tip toes to press her lips to his for a long, sweet kiss. As she lowered back to her heels she whispered, “I missed you too.”

Before she could move away he leaned down and captured her lips for a long and passionate kiss that left them both breathless. When he released her she still had her eyes closed and the corners of her mouth curled up into a small smile.

“I missed that too.” Ellie whispered with her eyes still closed. When she opened them she saw him staring at her with a smile of his own.

“I’ll never stop kissing you then.” He said with a chuckle and leaned down for own more lingering kiss before she gently pushed him away. 

“As much as I love the idea of that, I do need to get to work.” 

“Right, right. In you get.” He nudged her toward the doors. “Don’t forget to call me!” He called out and watched as she turned to nod. He gave her a small two finger wave and then turned back down the sidewalk. As he was walking he dug his mobile out of his pocket.

“What are your times looking like tonight?” He said into the speaker.

\-----

Ellie couldn’t keep the smile off her face for the rest of the day. She kept thinking over her weekend and the fun she had with Ben. Her meeting with her executive publisher had gone very well and she had been given the green light to move forward with the project that she was so interested in. 

It was a story about a young woman growing up on a plantation in South Africa. It was different from the historical mysteries and science fiction that were flooding the market at the moment, and the author was able to show the significant differences between the cultures of South Africa and the rest of the country, as well as the western civilizations.

Ellie loved the description of the rich culture and wilderness the author described. It was a vacation from the dark, dreary London atmosphere. She called the author and set up a meeting for first thing the next week. If they pushed hard they might be able to get the book out by the end of first quarter, making it a popular Summer read when the season rolled around.

So Ellie packed up her things for home with a much lighter heart than she had had in weeks. She pulled on her coat and wrapped her scarf around her neck. She breezed through the lobby and onto the street to head home. As she was walking she heard someone call out her name. She turned and saw Tom lightly jogging towards her.

“Ellie darling can you wait up a minute?” He asked and then reached her side. He pulled her into a tight hug and landed a kiss on her check. “You were out of the building before I even had a chance to catch you.” He said with a laugh.

“Tom what are you doing here? Did you have a meeting?” She asked and then stopped. “Why aren’t you at the theater?” She asked, concern in her voice.

“Relax darling.” He laughed again, “We’re on dinner, I have to be back in forty. I’m stealing your company for a bit.”

He took her hand and tucked it into the crook of his elbow and started leading her down the street. She stared up at him in confusion as she thought everything over. Suddenly it clicked into place and she took her other hand and hit him in the chest.

“Ben made you come walk me home!” 

“Hey you, I can’t have a bruise on my chest for the performance.” He joked and rubbed the center of his chest where she had hit him. She scoffed and made to pull her arm from his, he tightened his grip and started dragging her with him along the sidewalk. “Come on I’m already here so I might as well complete the journey.”

“I can’t believe this. I’m perfectly capable of walking on my own, I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I was rather looking forward to seeing you.” He looked down at her, “Are you really angry?”

She let out a sigh and leaned into him a bit as they crossed the street. “I’m never angry with you. I just hate to be a burden. I shouldn’t have said anything to Ben. I’m doing alright.”

“Sweetheart you’re never a burden. Usually we never find out that you needed help until after the fact. I like doing this for you.” When she stayed quiet he nudged her, “So how are things with Ben?”

She didn’t answer right away but she couldn’t keep the grin off her face. “It’s pretty great right now. We had a nice weekend, just relaxing and spending some time out on the town. No pressure, just something casual at the moment.”

“He’s leaving soon isn’t he? Have you two talked about that?” 

“Just that he’s leaving and the places he’ll be staying at.”

“Now this is only my opinion, take it or leave it. Maybe you should decide where you want this to go. Considering that all of this happened because of your trust in him. And I’m not saying you shouldn’t trust him now, I think he’s stepping up and wouldn’t dream of losing you. But he’s gone for what, four weeks? That’s a long time to be away, I know you understand that though.” 

Ellie let him babble on for a bit, she knew once he got an idea he wouldn’t stop until he had gotten it out of his system. When it looked like he was slowing down she squeezed his arm.

“Tom, we only really had an official date yesterday.” She explained patiently. “If I’m going to get back into this then I want to do it slowly. I have no idea what will happen between now and when he leaves. I’m going to wait and see.”

“I understand that your trust is a difficult thing to earn, but he’s trying to show you he can be that man.” He kissed the top of her head. “It’s nice to see you two trying to work things out. I like you guys together.”

“I like it too, I never stopped. That was never my decision.”

“I know love, I know.” 

They walked for a bit longer until they reached Ellie’s building. She checked the time and gave Tom a quick peck on the cheek. “You better get going, you’re pushing your luck.”

He looked down at his watch, “Damn, you’re right. Have a good night Ellie and call me soon!” He called over his shoulder as he walked quickly to try and find a cab.

She giggled at his retreating form and then headed up to her flat. As she was unlocking her door she pressed send for Ben’s number.

“How much trouble am I in?” He asked before she could say anything.

“Loads.” she said as she placed her things down on the counter.

“He wanted to see you anyways, I just help put the times together. Didn’t you have a nice time?” 

“Of course I did.” She let out a huff, “I just don’t like you two going out of your way like this. I’m alright, and it’s getting easier. Tomorrow night I’m going by the market to grab a few things before heading home so it will all be fine.”

“What do you need? I could order them for you and have them delivered to your place.”

“Ben…” Ellie warned.

“Fine, fine, fine. As you wish.” He took a deep breath on the other line. “Are you home now?” 

“Just walked in. Safe and sound. Have a good night filming and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright, have a good night. Sleep well.”


	13. Chapter 13

For the rest of the week Ellie worked hard on her new project at work, while still fitting in all the other manuscripts she had to go through. She fell back into her habit of walking to and from work, alone. She was beginning to feel confident again, she walked more relaxed and enjoyed the scenes around her. Ben was filming every night of the week so she heard from him occasionally but for the most part he was wrapped up with work.

She thought about the conversation she had with Tom, he was right. Being apart from each other for weeks was always difficult. It was a little more daunting because this was still new to them. She knew Ben and she had trusted him. Because of this, when she saw countless photos of him with all sorts of beautiful woman she was able to move past her jealousy and know that he would come home to her. After what had happened between them she needed to make a decision and soon. 

The pressure of this deadline was starting to be too much for her. She started talking walks after work and wandering aimlessly around her neighborhood. When Ben would call she would either let it go to voicemail or keep the conversation short and polite. She didn’t take Tom’s calls either. She talked to her friends about work and family gossip, but she avoided any questions about her and Ben. Ellie had a habit of keeping her problems up in her head and breaking them apart on her own before she said them out loud. By the end of the week she was a mess and was looking forward to a weekend of sleep. 

\---

Ben ended his call with Ellie on Friday evening and gripped his mobile tightly in his hand while he looked at the ground. He knew what she was doing. She was pulling back and rebuilding her walls to protect herself. Everything had been going wonderfully, they had had a great weekend and she seemed so happy when he saw her on Monday. What the hell had happened between now and then? A PA came by and let him know he had ten minutes before the next cue so he dug out a fag and took a long drag. He should’ve picked up on this sooner. Maybe then he could have walked with her to work this morning and seen her in person.

He felt his mobile buzzing in his trouser pocket and he got it out quickly hoping it was Ellie. When he saw the display he was disappointed.

“Tom, how are things?” 

“Ben have you heard from Ellie?” 

Ben stood up straight. “I just got off the phone with her, why? Is everything ok, did something happen?”

“No she’s fine. I just haven’t heard from her and I rang her a few times but she didn’t answer.”

“I haven’t seen her since Monday. I’ve called a few times but I can’t really get anything from her, she seems distracted.” Ben put the cigarette out with his shoe a bit harder than necessary.

“The thing is…” Tom paused for a beat too long.

“Fucking hell what did you do?”

“Nothing. I just asked her about your trip. If you guys had made any plans about how to handle the separation.”

“Bloody Christ, Tom!” Ben swore into the device. “You’re supposed to be helping me not terrifying the poor girl.”

“I was trying to help, honestly. I thought you would have talked about it already, don’t you leave rather soon?”

“Thursday.” Ben mumbled absently. He was going over the conversations with Ellie, this had to be it. She was worrying about him leaving. 

“So if you leave Thursday why haven’t you brought it up? This isn’t the same as it always was before, there won’t be the millions of calls and texts and naughty skype sessions-” Ben started to protest but Tom cut him off, “Shut it Ben, it wouldn’t be unheard of. This is as though you’ve been dating a girl for a week and now you’re skiving off for a month.”

“Shit.” He started pacing. “Shit. Shit. Shit. How in the hell am I supposed to handle this. I’ve only just got her trust back, what do I say to make her believe me now?”

“Be honest Ben, go to her and talk about it with her. Ask about her concerns and give her yours. For some unknown reason you were always the one who was able to get her to say what was in that gorgeous head of hers.”

“Oi!”

“Take it easy you moron. Think about what I’m saying, don’t go in with a speech prepared. Be open and let it come to you.”

“Right because my instincts have been so bloody great lately.” He grumbled. A PA got his attention and he nodded back to him.

“Well I can’t argue with that but for some reason our Ellie is quite taken with you.” Tom laughed on the other end of the call.

“Thanks Tom, listen I’ve got to ring off things are starting up over here.”

“Ciao!” Ben rolled his eyes and ended the call. 

After filming had dragged on for a few hours Ben got his phone and checked the time, just before midnight. He brought up Ellie’s number and wrote her a quick text. ‘Ellie I hope you’re sleeping. No filming this weekend so I was hoping you go to dinner with me tomorrow?’ He sent it and waited a few minutes to see if she would respond. Finally he put the mobile back in his pocket and went back to the set.

\----

Ellie was wrapped in her British flag throw and watching a movie when her mobile buzzed. She read the text from Ben and after thinking a bit she decided she would answer in the morning. Her head hurt too much to try and come up with an answer. After another hour she got up and went to bed.

The next morning she lay in bed and tried to make a decision. She had gotten into this too quickly. She remembered how hard it had been the first time Ben had gone away when they were together. She had missed him terribly but they had stayed in contact. They talked every free chance they had and the time had gone by faster than she had expected. But this time there was more bad times to outweigh the good.

So she climbed out of bed and made a decision. She wouldn’t go to dinner tonight, she would take this time as a break from Ben and when he came back they could see where things stood. She stepped into the shower and tried not to cry. As she methodically washed her hair, her chest was burning with the effort it took to hold back her sorrow. But she knew this pain wouldn’t last forever and it would probably hurt much less if she broke things off now rather than wait another four weeks to be taken advantage of again.


	14. Chapter 14

She went through her Saturday as well as she could. She went to the market and picked up a few things. She worked on some of the papers she had brought with her from work. In the late afternoon she curled up in her chair by the window and read one of the books she was in the middle of. 

Around five there was a knock at the door. She set her book aside and walked to the door. She paused for a moment and there was another knock.

“Who is it?” 

“It’s me Ellie.” She heard Ben say through the locked door. 

“Damn.” She muttered. She hadn’t expected him to actually come by. Over the last few weeks he had been letting her set the pace and hadn’t pushed things. She sighed, rolled her shoulders back and opened the door. “What is it Ben?”

“Can I come in?” He asked as he looked over her head and into her flat.

“Fine.” She took a step back and allowed him to walk past her into the kitchen. She closed the door and turned back to look at him. He had several bags and was pulling boxes of takeaway out. When he turned to get some dishes out of her cupboard she walked over and stood opposite the counter from him. “Ben what are you doing?”

“I brought your favorite curry from that little place around the corner from mine. I didn’t even forget the jasmine rice. Come on lets have some dinner.” He said as he starting spooning several large helpings onto their plates.

“Ben I thought you wanted to go to dinner?” She asked.

“Yes, well you never responded to my text so I figured I’d bring the dinner to you.” 

He pulled a bottle of cold white wine from another bag and dug through one of her drawers until he came up with the corkscrew. He poured them both a glass of wine and carried them over to her coffee table. Then he came back and took the two plates from the counter and set them by the glasses. When he came back for the second time he gently took Ellie by the shoulders and led her to sit by one of the plates of food. She sighed and lowered herself onto the floor and watched as he went back to the kitchen and found utensils. He came back and folded his impossibly long legs to sit with her at the table.

“So, Ellie my girl, you are avoiding me.” He said without preamble.

“I’m not, I just talked to you yesterday.” She protested.

He ate a piece of chicken and turned to look at her. “I think you would have given more information to a cab driver than you did in that call.”

She didn’t respond, just looked down at her food and started scooping up her curry and pouring it over the rice.

“Do you want to tell me what is going on?” He asked gently. He had a few more bites while he waited for her to answer him. When she continued to push her food around on her plate he took a deep breath. “I don’t know how it was for you, but seeing you last weekend was one of the best of my life.”

“I had a nice time too.” She said quietly and took a drink of her wine. She closed her eyes briefly, her favorite moscato. This man knew all of her weaknesses and right now that terrified her.

“Then what is in that beautiful head of yours?” He asked and he laid a hand gently on her knee. 

“Talk to me darling.” He cursed himself when he let the endearment slip out but Ellie hadn’t seemed to mind.

“You leave on Thursday right?” He nodded in agreement. “And then you won’t be back in town for at least four weeks, and that’s only if everything goes well.”

He didn’t answer just nodded again and waited for her to continue. When she didn’t say anything else he took a sip from his glass and then looked back at her.

“We’ve gone through this before. I’ll call you constantly, it will drive you mad.” He said with a chuckle, when Ellie didn’t laugh or look up at him his stomach dropped. “Please talk to me.”

“Ben I heard your side of what happened but you never heard-” Her voice cracked and she held her tears back and started again. “You never heard my side of the story.”

“I hadn’t been with anyone in a few years, and you knew that when we started dating. I started going out of my way to be with you and make you happy and I thought you were doing the same for me. After so long I let my guard down and gave you everything I had. Do you know why I was at your flat that day?” She didn’t look at him or wait for an answer. “I had fallen in love with you, I couldn’t wait any longer without at least telling you. So I used the key you gave me and brought over some wine and all I needed to make one of your favorites for dinner. I was so happy and excited and...and I was so in love.”

With every past tense of the word love Ben felt a stab go though his heart. He was frozen in place, his hands were curled into fists but he didn’t dare stop her. He deserved every agonizing word of this.

“I didn’t see you two at first, not until I heard you. So I smiled and looked through the kitchen, expecting to see you pacing with a script like usual. But instead I saw you taking another woman’s shirt off while she undid your belt.” 

She paused for a moment to catch her breath and smash the heels of her hands to her cheeks to get rid of the tears. Ben sat next to her and tried not to throw up.

“I didn’t stay for the rest, it wasn’t my place any longer. So I don’t know how much longer you were with her, I only have your word. Your word that I always accepted without a doubt before that day.”

She took a deep breath and stopped talking. She wiped her face again and raised her head to look Ben in the eyes. He had tears in his eyes and all the color had left his face. When she didn’t say any more he coughed and turned his head to rub at his eyes. Then he turned back to meet her gaze.

“I am so unbelievable sorry Eleanor.” He said with passion in his deep voice. “What I did was unthinkable and I will never forgive myself for putting you through that. I will never stop trying to make it right with you, but if you can’t see yourself with me again I understand. I would never force you to be with someone who treated you with this much disrespect. But please know that I love you. I will never stop loving you. You and I came to the same conclusion at the same time; you behaved as wonderfully as you always do and I behaved with the worst side of myself.”

At this declaration Ellie started crying harder, her shoulders were shaking with the effort. Ben resisted the temptation to reach out to her and pushed himself to keep talking.

“I can’t see myself with anyone other than you. You are so utterly clever and you make me laugh so easily that I try constantly to repay the favor. You are a genius at your job and I’m jealous that you can make other people’s words into a novel that will last, while I can only repeat them. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever known, I don’t know if I will ever see anything more beautiful than laying next to you and watching your eyes open to see mine. In this life I’ve made for myself there is nothing I wouldn’t give to have you again.”

Ellie was crying so hard she was having a hard time catching her breath. She was taking short gasping breaths of air and holding her stomach. She was starting to have a panic attack so Ben moved to her and lifted her to sit on the sofa. He knelt at her feet, put both his hands in her hair and raised her face to look at him.

“Eleanor.” He said sternly but kindly. “Look at me. There you are, take a breath. It’s alright, you’re ok. One more breath. Good girl. Give me your hand.” He grabbed her right hand and placed it on the center of his chest. He took slow exaggerated breaths. “Breath with me Ellie girl. There you are. Good. Good. Another one. It’s alright darling.”

She was able to breath but the tears never stopped. When she came back to herself she looked at Ben. Now that she was doing better he looked absolutely terrified. She threw herself at him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and buried her face into his shoulder. Ben was shocked for a second and he froze. Then he wrapped his arms around her and turned them so he was sitting on the floor with Ellie in his lap and his back against her sofa.

Ben wasn’t sure how long they sat this way but he let Ellie cry as he ran his hands over her back. He rocked back and forth and murmured soothing words into her hair. How long had she been holding this in? How could he have even thought of breaking this wonderful woman he had in his arms. And so they sat and took comfort from each other. Eventually Ellie had no more tears to cry and she was exhausted both physically and mentally. Ben felt her body start to relax and he tried to pull back to look at her.

“Ellie?” He asked with a shaky voice.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered and tried to wipe at the wet spot on his shirt where she had been crying.

“Hush now darling.” He tightened his hold on her and stood up from the floor. When she started to protest he shushed her. He walked into her bedroom and straight to the tub in her bathroom. He lowered her to her feet and then turned a few knobs so the tub started filling with hot water. He moved to the cupboard beneath her sink and pulled out the lavender bath salts and poured a handful in the water. Ellie stood silently watching him move around the small room. When the water reached the top he turned it off and turned to her with a sad smile on his lips. He moved to her and gave a kiss to the top of her head.

“Take your time darling. I’ll wait for you.” He said and then walked out and shut the door behind him.

When Ellie was settled in the bath she realized that those words were meant about more than just the bath.

\---

An hour later Ellie was much more relaxed. She drained the cooling water and pulled on her fluffy robe. When she walked out to the living room she was surprised to see Ben sitting on the couch reading one of her books.

“I thought you’d gone.” She told him quietly when he looked up. 

“I told you I’d wait.” He set the book down and stood up. “You didn’t touch your food darling, can you eat a little now?”

She nodded and moved to go to the kitchen.

“Sit down, I’ll fix it.” He went to the fridge and pulled out her plate of food. While he waited for it to heat up he brought her glass of wine over to her. “How are you feeling?”

“Better, thank you.” She took a sip from the glass and looked at the wall in front of her. 

Ben came back and sat next to her. She looked down at the plate in his hands and scoffed.

“That’s not mine, that’s way too much.” She exclaimed. 

He didn’t answer her, just chuckled and speared a piece of chicken with the fork in his other hand. He raised it to her lips and when she didn’t open her mouth he raised his eyebrow at her. She rolled her eyes at him and accepted the food.

“I can feed myself you know.” She grumbled.

Again he didn’t answer. As she chewed, he scooped up some of the rice and ate it himself. For the next few minutes they sat in silence and ate. In between bites he would pick out the best pieces and feed them to Ellie. They had shared a plate of food before and it was comforting to be doing something familiar. When Ellie took a sip of her wine she would offer the glass to Ben. 

When the plate and glass were empty Ben took both back into the kitchen. He came back with two full glasses and sat next to Ellie. They sat and sipped in silence for a moment before Ellie broke the quiet.

“It’s only eight at night. I feel like it should be three in the morning.” She mused.

“It’s been a long night.” Ben agreed.

“I want to finish this, but can we maybe take a break and talk in the morning?”

Ben felt his heart drop a bit but he nodded. “Of course. Whatever you’d like.” He rose to his feet and started to get ready to leave.

“Ben.” Ellie called out. He turned to look at her and she gave a shy smile. “Stay. Why don’t we watch a movie to take our mind off of things?”

He nodded again and moved to sit next to her and but she stood up. “Wait right here.” She told him and she disappeared into the bedroom. When she came back she had braided her hair and changed into some comfy pajamas. Ben couldn’t remember the last time he had seen her look so sexy. She had a pile of clothes in her arms and when she walked up to him he saw they were a pair of his sweats and his shirt. “So you don’t have to stay in that shirt and trousers all night, I know you hate it.” 

When he came back into the room she had removed the back cushions from the sofa and there were pillows at one end. The Avengers had just started playing on the telly and Ellie was curled up on her side under her ridiculous Union Jack blanket. When he reached the sofa she inched to the edge of the cushion and patted the space behind her. He smiled and climbed up to lay behind her. She threw the blanket behind her to cover them both and they moved around restlessly until they were settled.

By the time Loki had escaped Shield Headquarters, Ben was laying with his head on the pillows while Ellie rested her cheek on his arm under her head and his other arm was thrown over her and wrapped around her waist. They watched in silence for a few minutes before Ben leaned down and whispered in Ellie’s ear.

“Can I hold your hand?” 

She didn’t answer, just pulled her arm up and entwined her fingers with his. He let out a deep sigh and kissed her temple. They didn’t talk any more that night. They watched the movie until almost the end when they both fell into a deep and comforting sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

The light was shining brightly into the living room the next morning. Neither of them had thought to draw the curtains the night before. Ben squinted his eyes shut against the onslaught and tried to get a few more minutes of sleep. He hadn’t slept through the night in so long that he didn’t want it to end. When he realized it didn’t matter, he was completely awake, he started to move but froze when he felt a weight on his chest. He tilted his head and saw that Ellie had some how ended up on top of him. Her face was pressed into his collarbone while her hands were curled under her chin. Her legs ran down the length of his body and rested between his own. He raised his arms up and held her to him. 

After a few minutes he saw her eyelids flutter. She was starting to wake up so he rubbed his large hands up and down the length of her back. A couple of moments later she crinkled her nose and a frown appeared on her brow. Ben held back a laugh at this facial expression. He raised his hand and tried to shield her eyes from the bright light. Finally, she opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Ben’s palm. She started and twisted her head back to see him smiling at her. 

“God I’m knackered.” She said with a groan and she moved to stretch and then froze when she realized where she was. “I’m so sorry, what is wrong with me! I’m like an octopus I’m so clingy” Before Ben could say anything she was struggling to move from on top of him. She overestimated the room and fell onto the floor. She landed flat on her back with a groan.

“Are you alright? You didn’t hit your head did you?” Ben asked with concern as he sat up and attempted to help her into a sitting position.

She had knocked into coffee table and one of their glasses from last night had fallen onto the floor. When she moved her hand she hissed in pain. There was a good size cut on her palm and a small piece of glass jutting from the wound. 

“Goddammit Ellie,” Ben hissed out and he grabbed her hand to hold it still so he could look at it properly. “Can’t you ever just relax and then make a decision.” He roughly picked her up and carried her into the bathroom, holding her hand away from her the entire time. He sat her down on the counter and got a few things out of the cabinet. 

“I can do it Ben.” Ellie said frustrated. She was embarrassed enough over the sleeping position she had found herself in. She didn’t need him lecturing her for being clumsy on top of everything else. She tried to pull her hand away from him but his grip tightened.

He ran her palm under the tap and gently pulled the glass out. When he looked at it again he decided it wasn’t deep enough to need stitches. He let out a long breath. He kissed her forehead and moved to the items he had gathered. 

“I’m sorry sweetheart. You scared me.” He said as he cleaned the cut and put a plaster over the long line now running across her palm. When it was fixed up he pulled her hand up and kissed the area. “I go crazy if you’re hurt.”

“I’m alright.”

He pulled her into a crushing hug and then abruptly pulled away. “I’ll go clean up the glass.” He said and left without another word.

When Ellie came back into the living room the mess was gone and Ben was putting the sofa to right. He looked up and saw that she was dressed to go out. 

“Where are you-” He started to ask but she cut him off.

“I’m going to go get us some coffee and breakfast. I’ll be right back.” She grabbed her purse and coat and was out of the door before Ben could argue. 

Twenty minutes later Ellie was much more awake and had her head wrapped around her thoughts. She opened the door to her flat to find Ben standing at the window. When he heard the door close he rushed over to her to take the bags out of her hands. He pulled out two small plates for them while Ellie set the coffees on the counter. He pulled out the scones and muffins and put one of each on the plates. Lemon for himself; chocolate for her. Another routine of theirs.

They ate in silence for a few minutes. Ellie picked at her food and then pushed the plate away from her. 

“Ben, I don’t know if I can love you again.”

He lowered his head and felt sick.

“I want to try. I enjoy spending time with you and I think you are a good man. I think you could be a good man for me.” She looked down at her hands and then back up at him. “I want to try.” 

He raised his head and looked at her. Hope was bubbling in his chest.

“If this is going to work we need to move past what has happened. I’m going to do my best to trust you but you will need to be patient.” He started to protest but she stopped him. “Patience is not your strong point darling.”

“Sometimes I will lose my temper and so will you. If this works then we will have arguments and fights and terrible moments of anger towards the other person. But I will need to be mad at you for what you have most recently done, not for what you did before. And you will need to be mad at me; not pretend like it’s alright because you still owe me for what happened.” She paused and looked at him. She waited until he met her eyes and then asked, “Do you understand?”

“Yes.” He started to say more but she cut him off.

“This will need to be a fresh start. I need to learn to trust you again and you need to learn to want me, only me.” He nodded fervently. “Alright, what do you want to say?”

“I agree, Ellie you are so right. Christ you’re so much smarter than me. I understand. We’ll work from the beginning, not a fresh start but as much as we can make it.” He reached over and took her hand a pressed a kiss to her palm. “Thank you my darling.”

They finished breakfast and sipped their coffees slowly. 

“So, Thursday…” Ellie brought up.

“I’m going to do everything I can to make you at ease. I will call you and when I can’t call you I’ll text. No surprises.”

“No surprises.” Ellie nodded to herself and then looked up at him. “I like that.”

“Ellie, can I…” She looked up at him when he paused. “Will you kiss me?” 

She leaned on her stool and put her hand on his shoulder. When she gently touched her lips against his, he wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her to him. He pressed against her urgently and then let the tip of his tongue graze the seal of her lips. When she opened her mouth for a breath he deepened the kiss. His tongue traced the edge of her teeth and then curved against the roof of her mouth. She let out a moan and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. Without breaking the kiss she stood and placed herself standing between his legs as he continued to sit. She sucked on his tongue and then bit down gently. He hissed and pulled her impossibly closer to him. They maintained the connection until Ben pulled away for air.

“Christ Ellie.” He sucked in labored breaths. “Jesus Christ I have missed you.” He started placing lazy kisses down her neck. He pulled the neck of her shirt away and traced the corner of her neck and shoulder with his tongue. Ellie moaned at the feeling of his tongue on her skin. When he started to kiss lower she tried to pulled away from him with a groan.

“Ben.” She murmured, he hummed against her shoulder but didn't stop. “Ben, we should stop.” 

He let out a deep groan but pulled away. “I hate when you’re right.” He complained, his eyes were almost black as he met her gaze. “Do you want to do something today? I want to spend as much time with you as I can.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“Let’s go to the sea.” He said with excitement. 

“I have no idea what that means.”

“Will you come with me to mine so I can change, then we could go for a drive?” He asked her excitedly. He was already grabbing his things to leave.

“Give me a minute. I’ll get my stuff together.” She went into the bedroom and Ben couldn’t contain his enthusiasm. He did stand up and try to ignore the part of him that showed a different kind of enthusiasm.

After a few minutes she came back out with a small bag over her shoulder. She looked fantastic in her boots and tight jeans. She had an old Doors shirt over a long sleeve. She grabbed her coat and a scarf from the closet by the door. “Ready?” She asked him with a smile. 

“Always.”


	16. Chapter 16

When they got to Ben’s place he ran up the stairs to take a shower while Ellie waited downstairs. When she heard the water turn on she walked slowly around the living room. She looked at every piece of furniture. She glared at the sofa like it was some sort of enemy. Then she remembered what she and Ben had talked about. She found the last book she had been reading at his place and brought it with her to the dreaded piece of furniture. She sat down delicately but decidedly. After a few minutes she relaxed back into the cushions and lost herself in the story. 

A while later Ben stomped back down the stairs. When he saw his girl sitting on the couch in his living room he couldn’t hide his grin. She was back where she belonged. 

“Alright my lovely, lets get a move on. We have a long day ahead of us.” He walked up behind where she was sitting and kissed the top of her head. He picked up her coat and scarf for her. When she was ready to leave he held up the coat for her to put her arms into. Then he turned her so he could gently wrap the scarf around her throat. When she was properly wrapped up he pulled her by the lapels of her coat and gave her a quick but passionate kiss. When Ellie started to put her hands around him he pulled away with a chuckle. 

“Come on girl, we’re on a schedule.” 

“You put us on the schedule.” She protested. 

But she followed him out and into the lift. When they reached the lobby she saw that Gerry was working. She walked up and gave him a hug.

“Gerry, I’m so sorry about how I treated you. Please let me make it up to you.”

“Don’t think about it. You’re one of the nicest women in this building, something was wrong and that’s perfectly fine. You make my job a better place to be, sweetheart.”

“Thank you Gerry.” She said with a smile.

“I’ll be here for you young lady.” He said. When she walked past him he gave a stern look to Ben. Ben knew where that was coming from and he lowered his eyes and nodded. 

“Thank you Gerry.” He murmured as he passed him.

They found Ben’s car down the street and climbed in. Once they were settled Ellie turned to Ben. 

“Where are we going?” She asked as he pulled away from the curb and into traffic.

“Remember earlier when we said no surprises?” He asked and glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. “Can we make this one a surprise?” 

“The agreement has been in effect for almost an hour and already you want to change it. Today only.” She said sternly. Then settled back into her seat for ride, he let out a deep chuckle and focused on the drive. A little over an hour later they pulled into town. 

“You drive much too quickly,” Ellie admonished.

“You love it.” He said, and he navigated his way into the town. When they got close to the old part of the city he looked for a place to park. Finally he found a spot and parked the car. “Come along you. Let’s go have a look around.” 

He walked around to her side of the car and opened the door. He took her hand when she gave it, but didn’t let go when he shut the car door. 

“Dover?” She asked out of curiosity. She had never actually seen the chalk cliffs. 

“Dover.” He confirmed and he dragged her with him down the street. He pulled her hand to hold in his right so he could wrap his left arm around her shoulders. 

“I’ve never been here.” She said as she walked along with him. She seemed to be in a daze.

“I think we should try doing some things that are new for us. Do you want to go see the cliffs with me?” He asked as they walked through downtown.

“Very much.” 

“Alright then.” They walked down the streets, and thankfully no one seemed to notice Ben. When they got to an area where they could see the cliffs it hit both of them.

They stood at the edge and took it in. You could see for miles and the air was a beautiful clear blue. So simple and unblemished it was a nice contrast with the chalk white cliffs. After a few minutes the clouds thinned and then could see a faint outline of the French coast. The stood shoulder to shoulder and watched the sun’s rays glint down on France and then the tips of the waves crashing onto England’s coast. It was a perfect moment and Ellie turned to look up at Ben. He smiled down at her and reached for her face. She stepped out of his reach and then pulled his hand for him to follow her a few feet further away from the cliff’s edge.

“Ben, this is wonder-” Before she could finish her thought he crashed his lips to hers. 

He didn’t wait for her to take a breath; he put his thumb on her chin and pulled it down slightly. When her lips parted he attacked. The kiss went on for several moments until they were gasping for air. He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth and then left a chaste, considering, kiss on her lips when he pulled back.

They walked along the pathway for a long time. Looking out at the water and admiring the waves of grass that surrounded them. Ellie was tucked tightly in Ben’s side, he made sure to put himself between her and the drop off. She had her arms wrapped tightly around his waist but his couldn’t seem to stay still. He kept kissing her head and temple; raising his hand to run his fingers through her hair. It was as though he needed to reassure himself that she was truly there with him. Every few minutes he would lift her chin so he could place a kiss on her lips. 

They stayed for over an hour walking and talking about little things. When Ellie started to talk about being hungry they headed back into town. They found a small pub and Ben led Ellie to sit at a small table near the back. When he came back he had two pints with him. 

“Thank you.” She said when he handed her one.

He didn’t answer, only took her hand and kissed it.

“Ben it’s alright. I’m here.” She said with a chuckle.

“I know you are, I just can’t seem to keep my hands off of you. I’ll go mad leaving you for so long.” He looked at her for a long minute. “Are you sure you can’t come? It’ll be an adventure.”

“I would like to but I really can’t. I want to move this book along and the office is really busy right now. I’m sorry darling.”

“Don’t be sorry, it was worth a shot.” He said with a grin. “You never did tell me what this project of yours is about. Can you talk about it yet?”

So they chatted about the book and when their food came they hardly paused the conversation. They talked for another hour. Finally it was getting dark so they headed back towards London. Ben never let go of Ellie’s hand; she giggled when he would pull it with him to shift gears but she didn’t protest.

When they got into town he headed in the direction of Ellie’s building. As they got closer he got up the courage to ask her something he had been thinking about the entire ride home.

“Sweetheart.” She turned and smiled at him. “We’re filming tomorrow and Tuesday night. Would you maybe...would you like to...I was thinking…”

She squeezed his hand. “What is it?” She asked him gently.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” He asked hesitantly. His heart was pounding in his chest while he waited for her answer.

“Alright.” His grin lit up his face and he pulled her hand up so he could kiss her knuckles. “Let me just run up and grab a few things.”

“As long as you need, shall I come up and help?”

“No I won’t be long, this way you won’t need to find parking.”

He pulled up in front of her building so she could go upstairs. He waited in the car and watched the lights go on in her window. He fiddled with the radio and tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. After what felt like hours to him, the lights turned off upstairs. He turned the radio volume down to a normal level and jumped out of the car to take her bag from her. He led her around and opened her door, then put her bag on the back seat. As they headed towards Ben’s flat a thought occurred to him.

“Darling I didn’t even realize it until now but I have your overnight bag at mine. I should’ve had Tom bring it to you but…” He let the thought trail off. He didn’t know how to tell her that he couldn’t stand to give up any part of her.

“I forgot about that. I didn’t get it when I was there after the hospital either, well now I have a go bag.” She said and they both laughed at the idea. “Where is it? I didn’t notice it.”

“In my study.” He said quietly. 

“You’re an odd one. Well I’ll move it to your closet is that alright?”

“Wonderful, love. When MI5 puts in the call you will be ready.”

She giggled for a long time at that and Ben’s chest swelled with pride. Before he met her he had no idea that making someone laugh could make him feel this good. They walked into Ben’s building and rode the elevator up to the flat. Once they were inside Ben tossed his keys into the little bowl he had by the door.

“Make yourself at home sweetheart, I think I’ll just ring for some take away. Any cravings?” He called out to her as he walked to look at the menus he kept in the kitchen. When he was flipping through the different options he felt Ellie wrap her arms around him and press her body against his back. He placed his hands over hers and closed his eyes. “Hello stranger.”

“Can I have whatever I want?” She asked. She turned so her cheek was resting between his shoulder blades.

“Anything.”

“I want curry again.” She said and stood on her tip toes to place a kiss on the nape of his neck. She giggled when goosebumps broke out on his skin. She quickly pulled her arms away and walked towards the stairs. “I’m going to change my clothes, you know what I like darling.”

Ben stood frozen in the same spot she had left him. He shook his head gently and turned to poke his head out of the kitchen. “You don’t play nice, Fraser!” He called to her back. 

“Don’t forget the rice!” She said and continued up the stairs.

Ellie changed into some sweats and the long sleeve she had under her shirt. She brushed her hair and braided it. While she was in the bathroom tying the bottom of the braid, Ben walked in the bedroom with her bag in his hand. He raised it at her and then moved to put it in the walk in closet. 

He walked up behind her and kissed the top of her head. He looked at her in the mirror. “Dinner in twenty darling.” He looked down at her attire, “I think I’ll change too.” He gave a gentle tug on the end of her hair and walked back in the bedroom.

She finished up and walked past him to go down stairs. As she neared him his long arm snaked out and wrapped around her waist. Before she could get a word out he had pushed her onto the bed. He leaned down and kissed her deeply. She moaned and gripped onto his shirt so tightly she thought it would tear. The kiss went on and on until she was starting to wonder when he was going to let her breath, but she couldn’t begin to care about something so trivial. Suddenly he pulled away and picked up a small pile of clothes from the dresser. He turned and walked into the bathroom.

“I’ll just be a mo’.” He said as he closed the door.

Ellie lay stunned for a minute as she caught her breath and tried to understand what the hell that was. When her brain cleared she had it - payback. “Bastard!” She yelled at him and she heard him chuckling behind the closed door.

The rest of the night was a casual affair. Sitting on the floor eating and watching bad television. They cleaned up and climbed the stairs hand in hand. Ellie went to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth while Ben pulled the blankets down on the bed. He joined her for teeth brushing and she stuck her tongue out at him when he saw the toothpaste tube squeezed from the middle. 

Ellie set the alarm for her phone and turned her light off. Ben wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to his chest. She looked up at him in the darkness.

“I’ve missed this too.” She whispered, as though anything louder would break the spell.

“Me too Ellie.” He whispered back. 

He put his hand under her chin and raised her face so he could kiss her. It started out innocently enough but after a minute they were both moaning and grasping each other. When Ellie kissed his adam’s apple his whole body shivered and his chest rumbled with a long moan. He pulled her hair gently and bit her earlobe.

“Oh God.” She said and it was her turn to shiver. She opened her eyes to look at him and he was looking back at her. She cleared her head and remembered what they had discussed. This was still new. She didn’t want to take this step yet, especially with him leaving in a few days. She was aching for him, it had been so long and she longed to feel him again. But she tried to act like an adult and she cleared her throat. “We should stop before we go any further.”

He closed his eyes but nodded in agreement. “Christ I want you.” His voice was rough with lust and it did nothing to help her stand by her decision. “But you’re right. This isn’t the right time.” He took a deep breath and rolled onto his back, he pulled Ellie with him so her head rested on his shoulder.

“It’s late and it’s been a hell of a weekend. Get some sleep Ellie girl.” He gave her a sweet kiss and laid his head back down.


	17. Chapter 17

When Ellie’s alarm went off the next morning she reached her arm back and turned it off. Sometime in the night Ben had turned on his side and she was molded along his back. Her knees were folded into the bend of his and her toes were tucked between his calves. She smiled and placed a kiss on the skin between his shoulder blades and slid her arm back around his stomach. He groaned and stretched; when he felt Ellie's hand on his stomach he brought his own up to hold hers. 

“Morning love.” He said, his voice still scratchy from sleep.

“It’s early still. Get some more sleep darling.” She pressed another kiss to his back and pulled her arm away so she could get out of the bed. Before she could stand up Ben had rolled over and pulled her back to him.

“Mmm I don’t want sleep, I want you.” He pressed his lips to hers to cut off the argument she was going to use. She finally relaxed against him and he chuckled and deepened the kiss. He rubbed her back under her shirt then brought his hand around to rest against her stomach. Finally he broke the kiss and grinned sleepily at her. “Are you sure you aren’t feeling too sick to go in today?”

“Unhand me you oaf, I’ll be late.” He groaned but he relaxed his grip on her. He watched her gather up her clothes and walk to the bathroom. 

“If you need some help in there just say the word.” He called out and laughed as she shook her head while she was laughing at him.

“You’ll be the first one I call.” She let him know and then she closed the door.

Despite Ellie’s protests Ben walked her to her office building and handed over her satchel when the reached the door. 

“So I was having a thought.”

“Oh dear.” Ellie said dramatically.

“It’s true. Anyways, we should be done tonight by four in the morning. What would you say to meeting me for an absurdly early breakfast tomorrow around five?” She groaned and pressed her face into his chest. “I know, I know. It’s early but it will be the breakfast of your dreams. All the beans and grilled tomatoes you could ever want; thick pieces of toast smeared with butter. Coffee will be at the ready and…” He searched his brain for another incentive. “And I will bring you an amazing lunch for you to take with you.”

“Alright.” She grumbled. “But only because I have a weakness for charming men with severe cheekbones.” She brushed her fingers across said feature. “And I am a touch fond of you.”

“You are wonderful.” He squeezed her in a tight hug and then let her go quickly. “Go on love, I’ll talk to you later and see you in the morning.” He gave her a quick but fierce kiss.

“Go get some sleep, I don’t want you grouchy for our breakfast.” She waved and went into the building.

\---

The next thing they knew it was Wednesday night and Ben was packing for his trip. Ellie was laying across his bed while he put random clothes into his suitcases. A few times she had him put something back so he wouldn’t be tempted to wear it in front of cameras. 

“That is a great shirt!” He argued when she pulled a bright yellow button up out and handed it to him.

“It won’t go with your other outfits, darling.” 

“But I love this one. It reminds me of the time we all went out together, and Tom got so pissed he fell into that hedge.” He leaned onto the bed to hover close to her face, “You were very drunk as well and very, very sexy.” He gave a rough kiss to her lips and when he pulled back his eyes were dark. “Do you remember?”

She pulled away from him and sat on her knees by the headboard. His eyes followed her every movement as she pulled the shirt from him. She undid the shirt's buttons and then, without breaking eye contact, she pulled her shirt over her head. She heard Ben take a sharp breath and then swallow loudly, his eyes traced over her body quickly and then went back to her face. She pulled the shirt over herself and slowly buttoned it back up. His eyes followed her fingers along each button until the lace of her bra was covered by the material.

“I think I remember.” She said with a smirk.

“Fucking hell.” Ben breathed out and ran his hand through his hair. He hadn’t moved from his spot next to the bed. When he started to move towards her Ellie clicked her tongue at him.

“Somebody needs to finish packing.” She said with a giggle.

“I’ll need my shirt back then.” He smiled and held his hand out to her.

“You can have it when you get back.” She twisted to lay on her back again and the shirt slid down to expose her shoulder. When he froze again with his eyes glued to the newly exposed skin she waved her hand to him. “Hurry up you, I want to get to sleep soon.”

He let out a theatrical sigh and disappeared back in the closet. 

An hour later Ellie was covered in clothes that hadn’t made the cut. When Ben came out of the bathroom with his toiletries in a travel case he saw that she was curled around one of his jumpers and fast asleep. He froze in his tracks, he had lost count of the times she had made him do that tonight. He gently placed his case down and pulled his mobile out to take a picture of her. He was grinning at the beautiful woman asleep on his bed, wrapped in his shirts and trousers. 

He finished putting his things together and placed the suitcase by the door. Then he went to the bed and began picking the clothes off of Ellie one at a time. The pile on the bed slowly became a pile on his floor. As he reached the last pair of trousers he had to hold back his laughter when he pulled on one leg and Ellie rolled across the bed. Finally she was free of the laundry and wearing her tight jeans under his button up. He leaned down next to her and smoothed the hair back from her face.

“Sweetheart.” He said gently in her ear. “Would you like to get up and change?” 

She only groaned and reached up to undo her jeans. When she couldn’t open the button easily she pulled on Ben’s hand.

“Too tired, you do it.” She grumbled and kept her eyes closed.

Ben pulled his lower lip between his teeth and hitched the shirt up a bit so he could see the top of the zip. He slip his fingers into the top of her jeans and pulled the button open, then he pulled the tab down slowly so he wouldn’t catch her skin on accident. When they were loose he grabbed the sides and pulled them down her long legs. He stood up at the foot of the bed and carefully pulled the jeans completely off. 

He tried not to stare at the image of his Ellie laying in his bed, wearing nothing but his shirt and her knickers. So he made sure her alarm was set and quickly changed into a pair of flannels. He turned off the lights and gently picked her up into his arms so he could pull the blankets back. He put her in the center of the bed and climbed in next to her. When he pulled her to him she wrapped her arm around his waist and slid her legs between his. 

He closed his eyes and tried to relax. He tried to think about his flight tomorrow and the first few stops for the press tour. He tried to think about anything other than the half naked woman wrapped around him under the sheets. He blew out a deep breath. This was going to be a long night, followed by an even longer four weeks.

\---

When the alarm went off the next morning Ben reached his long arm across the bed to silence it. He wrapped his arms around Ellie and held her. She wasn’t asleep, the pair of them had been awake for almost an hour. He brushed his fingers through her hair gently so he wouldn’t pull any tangles that had appeared in the night. 

“It’s going to be alright Ellie girl.” Ben whispered to her.

“I know.”

“I’m going to be so busy. It’s going to be solid interviews and sleeping for me.”

“I know.”

“I doubt the guys will even have time to go out. We’ll be so surrounded by press and appearances that it will be a whirlwind and then back home.”

“I know.”

“Ellie.” He pulled gently on her hair to get her to look up at him but she wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Talk to me love.”

“It’s nothing. Just sleepy that’s all.” She tried to put her face back against his chest.

“Don’t lie to me darling. Please talk to me.” He cupped the side of her face with his hand.

“I’m terrified.” Ellie whispered, but still wouldn’t look at him. “This is coming at the worst possible time. I just got used to having you and now you’re gone. I don’t want to go back to being alone again.” 

Ben crushed her to him and it was quiet for a few moments. He felt wetness on his chest and knew that his girl was crying. He hated his job at that moment. Who did he think he was to put this woman through this much pain. He didn’t have any words to make the situation any better. After a few minutes Ellie leaned up and kissed him.

It was a kiss he would always remember; he would love and hate it equally. Her lips molded to his passionately and she crawled up his body until she had pushed him onto his back and was straddling his stomach. Her body was flush with every inch of his upper body so he wrapped his arms tightly around her. She sucked on his upper lip and then moved to the lower one. She pulled away and left feather light kisses on his forehead, nose, eyelids, both cheeks the side of his chin and then one last one for his mouth. It would have been extremely erotic if it wasn’t for the tears that left damp spots along the edges of his features. 

As suddenly as it began it was broken. 

She pulled away from him and went into the bathroom for a shower. He started to follow her when he heard the click of the lock. He lay flat on his back and tried to take deep breaths. He would be leaving about an hour after her so there wasn’t much point for her to skip out on work. He crawled out of bed and walked quietly to the door to place his ear against the wood. Over the rush of the water he could hear her crying; the sound of her hurting made his heart break. 

Finally he went downstairs to make her some breakfast. He put the kettle on and got out a few eggs to scramble. He moved the eggs so he could brown some bread in the pan as well. When the water was ready he heard her coming down the stairs. She was ready for work and looked absolutely gorgeous. Her hair and makeup was done as well; he noticed there was a bit more mascara and eyeshadow than usual - to cover up the redness. She gave him a smile and sat at the counter like it was any other morning for them.

“You made breakfast, you hate making breakfast.” She said to his back.

“I said I hate making breakfast for myself. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t fix for you...including eggs.” He looked over his shoulder at her and winked. 

“Anyone who said the naked chef was overrated never saw you cook without a shirt.” She laughed.

He split the eggs and toast onto two plates. He passed them to her and made them both a cup of tea. When he took a seat next to her he wrapped his arm around her waist. He picked up his fork with his other hand.

“Don’t forget to tip your waiter.” He said to her in a deep American accent. They ate in silence and Ellie noticed she needed to leave. 

“Alright my dear, I’m off.” She placed her dishes in the sink. Then she walked to pick up her bags.

“Darling, I really want you to have this. It belongs to you.” Ben held out her keychain with the key to his flat dangling from it.

“I don’t want it. This is your place, it’s private.” When she saw him look down and turn to put the key on the side table she frowned. “Your housekeeper has a key right? So if you need something you can get it.”

“That was never why I gave it to you.” He said quickly. “But not to worry. It’ll keep.”

He held her coat up for her and wrapped her scarf around her throat. When she turned to tell him goodbye he was stepping into a pair of shoes and pulling on a wool coat.

“What on Earth are you doing?” 

“I’m walking you down, what does it look like?” He took her bags from her and ushered her out into the corridor. When they reached the lobby he asked Gerry to hail a cab for her. He turned to face her. 

“It’s going to go by quickly. I wasn’t joking when I said I would drive you mad with calls. I’ve got you back and there is no way I am going to ever let you go.” He grabbed her and pulled her up against his chest. “You’re mine Ellie. You won’t get away from me again, I won’t let it happen.” He smashed his lips to hers. The kiss lasted long enough for Gerry to open the door and clear his throat.

“I’m sorry sir, but when the young lady is ready.” He stepped back outside to open the door to the cab.

“Ben. I…” Ellie didn’t know what to say so she raised her hand to the side of his face. “I’ll see you soon.” She kissed her fingers and touched them to his lips. Then she turned and walked out to the waiting car. When she was sitting in the cab she raised her hand and gave a small wave, then she was gone.


	18. Chapter 18

Ben called her the moment his flight landed in New York. After that it was hit and miss between the both of their schedules. When Ellie came home from Friday she was furious with herself when she realized she was nursing a broken heart...again. She stomped up the stairs and looked forward to drinking more than a couple glasses of wine. When she reached her door she saw a letter on her doormat. 

She scoffed and shook her head. She knew he had people to help him out but wasn’t this a bit beneath him? She went to the kitchen to set her bags down on the counter. She looked at the letter closely and when she turned it over there was a small note attached to the envelope. 

‘This is for you, Mr. Cumberbatch said he couldn’t trust anyone else. I hope to see you soon. -Gerry’

She felt her ears warm up with the blush that covered her face. She sat down in her favorite chair and carefully tore open the envelope. She pulled out the letter. 

‘My Darling Ellie,

I’m sitting in my study and you’ve just left. I can’t stand that you're gone and now it is taking everything I have, not to follow you to your office and drag you onto the plane with me. That raises several problems: such as how am I going to bribe the airline for an extra seat, or I could put you in my suitcase - but you probably wouldn’t enjoy that very much. I hope that made you laugh.

I do love to make you laugh my darling.

I am going to see all these exotic and wonderful places all over the world. I should be the luckiest man alive, I don’t think anyone outside the British Armed Forces gets to travel like I do. But seeing the cathedrals and oceans and gorgeous cities don’t do anything for me. I can hardly see their beauty because I am too engrossed in counting the hours until I am with you again.

Soon I am going to force you to take a vacation so we can visit the places I’ve been and see them as tourists; see them as lovers. You never truly know a city until you have viewed it as a lover. Your heart is so open and free. 

Know that I am counting the minutes, the hours, the days and the nights until I can hold you once again. 

I am always yours,

Your Ben’

Ellie folded the letter carefully and placed it back in the envelope. Then she dropped it to the floor and fell into herself and cried.

\---

She woke up the next morning on the couch. That man could write a beautiful letter. She didn’t stand a chance against his charm. She lay there for a few moments to try and wake up. Her eyes kept straying to the book that was brimming with letters. 

Hours later Ellie was sitting on her living room floor and surrounded by his writing. She had finally brought a teapot and a mug to take up residence on the coffee table. When she read the first letter Ben had left; she had laid onto her side and cried. To hear that night described in such detail, unnecessary in her opinion but completely his style, she couldn’t stand to have her heart break again. She read his words and then again and again and again, until she forced herself to put it aside. 

The other letters were a mix. One told about an argument between Martin and Amanda on set. It started out innocently enough about which jacket he should wear, and the next thing Ben knew, Amanda was threatening Martin with no sex for the next month. Martin countered by saying she wouldn’t be able to hold out that long. The conclusion was a contest of who could abstain the longest. Ben ended the letter by saying they hadn’t lasted 24 hours.

A few of them were flowery descriptions of everything he loved about her. The feel of her hair running through his fingers, her holding his shoulders so she could reach his lips, how small her hand felt in his, the dimple at the corner of her mouth. One letter described the different clusters of freckles on her body.

In another letter, Ellie found the description of the house they would own together. A huge shower for him and a beautiful tub for her. And a library that would rival Beauty and the Beast. He insisted they have a garden so they could lay together on the grass and read. The house walls would be decorated by the photos and paintings they had; it would be a wonderful mix of the both of them.

The letters were now some of Ellie’s most precious possessions. She took them all carefully and placed them in one of her boxes. In a way she was happy she hadn’t read them until now because she was able to have this fresh part of Ben, even though he was so far away. Her mobile starting ringing across the room so she moved to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Ellie my darling, it has been too long since I heard your voice.” Ben’s voice rumbled through the speaker.

“I miss you already.”

“Are you sick? You sound like you have the sniffles.”

“I’m fine. I was reading your letters and I got a little teary. They’re lovely by the way. Thank you so much.”

“Why did you read them now? I didn’t want you to cry silly girl, they were supposed to cheer you up.”

“Happy tears. I love them so much. Ben?” She paused and tried to figure out how to say the next part.

“What is it sweetheart?”

“Ben I’m sorry I didn’t read them. It was too hard for me to even think about it, and...well...I’m sorry for ignoring you.”

“Don’t you dare apologize.” He said rather sternly. “You did absolutely nothing wrong. You weren’t ignoring me, quite the opposite in fact. You were talking to me and letting me spend time with you. As fresh of a start as we can make it. Remember love?”

“I know but I really am so-”

Her apology was cut off by Ben clicking his tongue at her. 

“No apologies love. Now tell me something to cheer me up.”

“Why do you need cheering up?” 

“Because my sexy girlfriend is a thousand miles away from me.”

“She sounds fascinating.” Ellie said with a giggle.

“You have no idea.” He groaned into the phone. “She is a bit daft though.”

“No I’m not!” She protested with a laugh.

“She is. She organizes her books by size and then for no reason at all she will move one book to fit on another shelf. The actions of a crazy person I tell you.”

“That was one time! And if you had been paying attention you would have seen that the book was too tall to fit with the others.”

“Are you saying that you’ve never done that before or after?” 

She hesitated and then giggled. “Sometimes I worry you’ll put a secret camera in my flat.”

“Ooo now there’s an idea. Maybe one for the bedroom too.” Ben mused to himself.

“Easy.” She laughed at him. “How’s it so far?”

“Same as usual. Martin and Lee say hi by the way. Well, they all do really.”

“That is sweet. I think I’m going to go with Amanda and the kids to Hamleys tomorrow.”

“Oh dear. I should’ve left you some allowance money so you could stalk up on your Harry Potter collection.”

“Hey! I like going with the kids because then I have an actual excuse to go in a toy store without looking like a creep.”

“Buy me something fun!” Ben yelled out.

“You’re such toddler.” She laughed. “Are you going to buy me something where you are?”

“It’s a surprise.” He sang.

“Fine, fine.”

“Listen, sweetheart I’ve got to go, but I’ll talk to you soon, yes?”

Ellie tried not to sound too disappointed about the short conversation. “Yes, talk to you soon. Bye.”

“Bye Ellie girl.” And the call disconnected.

\---

The rest of the week went by. Ben sent texts throughout the day and called as much as they could fit in. Near the end of the week she started receiving envelopes from hotels and airports. Inside each envelope was a postcard from wherever Ben was at the time. He seemed to favor the most ridiculous and cheesy ones he could find, and Ellie couldn’t help but smile and add them to the front of her refrigerator. 

On Saturday she got a text from Tom that only said ‘Dinner? Tomorrow night.’ She rolled her eyes. A text with that little to say was completely unheard of from the man, he must be exhausted or in the middle of something. She replied back with a ‘yes’ to frustrate him.

Sure enough a minute later she received another text from him. ‘Don’t push me love. I’ll plan out your schedule for the next two weeks if you don’t want to make any decisions.’ She laughed out loud, that was more like him.

Another minute later; ‘See you at 4’

The next day the predetermined hour came around and with it came a slightly grumpy Tom. Ellie let him in the flat and kissed him on the cheek. 

“Well?” She asked while he was looking at the pictures now on display in her kitchen.

“Well what darling?” He turned to look at her.

“What’s got you in a fit?” She crossed her arms and waited.

“Nothing.” He blew out a breath and sat on her sofa. “Honestly it’s nothing darling. I’m just exhausted and that makes me a bit short. Come here, I’ll be better company I swear.” He held his long arm out to her.

When she came closer he took her hand and pulled her around the back of the couch to join him on the cushion. When she sat down he wrapped his arm around her.

“You got me in trouble with Ben.” He said with a laugh.

“What are you on about?” She asked, confused.

“He told me off for bringing up his trip before you two had a chance to talk about it.”

“Oh please, that man couldn’t stay mad at you even if he tried. And I didn’t tell him that we talked about it.” She pointed out with a jab of her elbow to his ribs.

“Well…” He paused for a minute and searched for words.

“He’s speechless.” She turned to face him and put her hand on his forehead. “Are you feeling ill?”

He pushed her off of him and into the corner of the couch. He stood up and tickled her sides relentlessly until she started to cry for mercy. Then he walked over to the front door.

“Where are you going?” 

“I’m starving, come on you.” He pulled on his coat and reached for hers.

“Tom it’s before 5 at night. How can you want dinner this early?” She shook her head but headed over to him so they could leave.

“My schedule is all over the place. I’m used to eating now and then again in the middle of the night.” They walked down the street and Tom hailed a cab.

“Where are we going?” Ellie asked when he gave an address but no name.

“I am in the mood for some garlic and chicken.”

“You are so strange.” She chuckled. “How’s the play?”

They went to dinner and split a bottle of wine. Ellie laughed all evening, it felt like a long time since she had felt so light hearted. When they left the restaurant they walked hand in hand and talked about what had been going on in each other’s lives. 

“What happened with Heather? I thought you were doing really well together?” 

Tom shrugged. “She lives in New York. I think the long distance just got to be too much. When it happens it will happen. Unless I get to be as lucky as Ben when he found you,” He nudged her with his shoulder, “I’m not going to rush into it.”

“You’re all pretty lucky to have found me. I’m irreplaceable.” Ellie said with a laugh and laughed harder when Tom pushed her.

“Cheeky!”


	19. Chapter 19

A little over a week later Ben was trapped in yet another press junket; at least he wasn’t alone for once. When he sat down in the chair next to Luke, he gave him a tired smile. 

“Luke. How are you?” He shook his hand and took a drink of his tea.

“Hanging in there. Ready for this to be over, how about you?” 

“Absolutely. I can’t wait to be back home. Where are you after this?”

“Same. Filming is mostly being done in the UK so I won’t be far.”

“Dracula? I heard there were some production problems in the beginning, all sorted?”

“I don’t know Ben, why don’t we talk about it a little closer to the microphones.” Luke punched him in the shoulder and then laughed.

“Jesus. I won’t be able to use my arm for the rest of the day.” Ben grumbled good naturedly as he rubbed the muscle in his shoulder.

“Pity that, you would need it too.” Luke took a drink of his water. “What with you being away from that gorgeous creature of yours for so long.”

“Shut it!” Ben snapped. But then grinned at him, unable to keep a stern face for long.

As they were winding up for the day Ben got a couple of texts from Ellie and an email from his publicist back home.

When he opened the email all it said was ‘just giving you a head’s up’. Frowning he scrolled through the pictures he found. They were pictures of Ellie - with Tom. At first it didn’t look like much, just them going into a restaurant. Ellie had told them they went to dinner so it wasn’t much of a surprise. The next few made him frown. One of Ellie and Tom walking down the street holding hands. Another of them hugging on a street corner. And finally one of Ellie standing on tip toes to lean into Tom. Ben gripped his mobile hard in his hand.

Luke leaned over to look at what had upset his friend and saw the picture on the screen. “Isn’t that…?”

“Yes.” Ben said in a clipped tone.

“Listen, mate, it’s nothing. You have all been friends for a while now. You and Ellie have been inseparable for months, not a chance something like this is going on.”

Ben let out a breath but didn’t tell the man about what had happened over the last few weeks. He scrolled to find the texts from Ellie. They were simple and casual messages, saying hi and that she missed him.

He put his phone away and sat up to finish the last interview.

“Ben, do you want to talk abo-”

“Just leave it Luke.” He snapped back at him. Then they both had to put on a different face as the reporter walked in.

Later that night Ben was sitting in his hotel room with a glass of scotch. Ellie had called twice and then sent a text to apologize if she had been interrupting. He didn’t feel betrayed, he felt desolate. He had been so focused on proving his loyalty to Ellie that he hadn’t even considered this. He didn’t even blame her. After the way he had treated her it was no surprise that she would turn to someone else; someone who could be there for her.

He sat in silence and drank. After a while there was a knock at the door. When he went to open it he saw Martin.

“What the bloody hell is going on?” He asked as he pushed past Ben into the room. “Luke wouldn’t tell me anything, just that there were some photos of Ellie.”

Ben didn’t answer him. He shut the door and walked to retrieve his mobile from the table. He pulled up the photos and gave the device to Martin. Ben downed the last of his glass and poured himself another.

“Ben, what the fucking hell is wrong with you?” He tossed the phone onto the couch. “Those aren’t anything. You didn’t know she went to dinner with him?”

“She told me.” Ben said quietly as he sat down in his chair. Martin sat across from him. 

“Then what is the problem?”

“I wouldn’t blame her. After everything, she deserves someone better.”

“Have you talked to her about it?” When Ben didn’t say anything he had his answer. “She forgave you. She said she trusted you and she wanted to make this work. Can’t you give her some of the same fucking trust?”

Ben didn’t answer, just continued to look at the ground. 

“Fine! If you are determined to think the worst of her than you don’t deserve her.” He stood up with a huff. Just before he reached the door, Martin turned to look at the other man. “Just do me one favor? Don’t fucking speak to her until you’ve sobered up.” He turned and left the room with a slam of the door.

Ellie didn’t call the rest of the night and Ben didn’t try to reach her.

The next morning Ben woke up with a splitting headache. He cracked open his eyes so he could find the time, he had to be ready to leave in a few hours. He got into the shower and let the cool water wake him up. His head was a bit clearer and he thought over what Martin had said. He was right, why was he determined to think so badly of her. When he was getting dressed his mobile rang, it was Tom. He clicked the engage button.

“Tom.” Ben said flatly.

“Ben, I saw the pictures and it’s nothing. You know that, she’s one of my dearest friends - so are you for that matter.”

“I’m losing my fucking mind.” He groaned and rubbed his hand over his face and into his hair.

“We went to dinner at 5 in the afternoon. We ate and walked home. That’s all and you know it.” There was a break and then Tom said, “You and I might be bastards but our Ellie would never do that.”

“You’re right.” How had he thought that of her, he was disgusted with himself. He tensed and punched the doorframe of the bathroom. “Fuck!” 

“You didn’t tell her any of this did you?”

“No, Martin practically tore my head off.” He looked down at his hand with curiosity, nothing was broken but the skin was torn over his knuckles.

“Listen, don’t bring it up. I doubt she even knows the pictures are out there. Wait until you get home to talk about it. With this much distance between the two of you it would make things more difficult.”

He let out a sigh and nodded, when he realized that his friend couldn’t see him he spoke up. “Listen, Tom, I’m sorry about-”

“Don’t mention it. I know how it is to fight every instinct when you see something like that.”

“I owe you one.”

“I’ll make sure to hold you to it. Maybe when I want something ridiculously expensive.”

“Sod off.” Ben laughed at him.

“Later Ben.” 

Ben hung up then did the time change in his head. Ellie would be at work but it was worth a try He found her number and waited for it to connect.

“Hello Ben darling.”

Ben’s heart melted at the greeting. “Ellie girl.” He breathed into the phone.

“Is everything alright?”

“It’s fine, I just miss you terribly. Remember when I told you I would drive you mad?” She giggled and said she did. “Well I’m pretty sure I’ve lost my mind before I could attempt to take over yours.”

“I miss you too. I called this morning, well last night your time. Long day?” 

“The longest. I’m so sorry I couldn’t get back to you until now.”

“No worries. This is how it goes darling.” Ben closed his eyes as the guilt rushed through him. He squeezed his fist and the pain that shot through him made him feel a bit better.

“I can’t wait to see you.” 

“Me too, listen I’ve got to go back inside, I stepped out to take the call. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Bye darling.”

Ben got ready and then walked to Martin’s room. The door opened after a minute.

“Well?” Martin asked with his eyebrows raised.

“I came to apologize and to thank you.” Ben said, and when the door opened wider he let himself in. “I was a fool and I should've listened to you. Of course it was nothing.”

“Did you call her?”

“Not until just now, I don’t think she’s even seen the pictures.”

“At least you kept your trap shut. Think it through next time.” Martin looked down as his phone chirped. “Are you on this flight?”

“Yes, I’ll catch a ride with you if that's alright?”

“I’m not your fucking nanny.” He grumbled as Ben walked to the door. “I’ll meet you in the lobby.”


	20. Chapter 20

Ellie was so jittery she could hardly keep still. It had been 4 weeks and three days since she had seen Ben. She had talked to Joy at his publicist's office and arranged for her to catch a ride in the car to pick Ben up from the airport. Joy had given her one strict condition: she was in no way allowed to exit the car at the airport. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She laughed over the phone.

Joy laughed back and told her they had enough problems without the scandal the two of them would cause in public. Ellie had laughed with her and given her word to remain inside the car. 

When the car pulled up to Heathrow it was nearing half past 3 in the morning. Ellie tried to sit still and then she saw him. He looked exhausted. He had a bag over his shoulder, a garment back in one hand and his large rolling suitcase in the other. The driver met him and took his luggage. Ben thanked him and stood on the curb to visit with the man for a few minutes. Ellie giggled because she knew then that he had no idea she was here.

When the boot slammed shut the driver made to open the door for Ben but was waved away. Ben reached for the door himself and slid into the backseat. Before he could close the door he gave a startled gasp. When he didn’t move towards her or to shut the door Ellie gave him a shy smile.

“Hi.” She said quietly, but she didn’t move.

“Oh Christ.” He gasped and reached for her. He pulled her onto his lap and held onto her for dear life. The driver chuckled and closed the neglected door before he moved to enter the driver’s seat.

“Oh Ellie,” Ben whispered into her neck. “Ellie, my Ellie.” He brushed her hair back and pressed his lips to hers. It was a gentle and slow kiss. His tongue traced the inside of her mouth lazily, as though he needed to relearn all of the smooth lines and curves of her teeth. Her tongue met his and they brushed against each other slowly. 

Finally they took a deep breath and Ben crushed her back to his chest. They didn’t speak for a long time. They just held each other as the car drove through the night. Ellie was facing Ben with her knees on the seat, on either side of his hips. Her arms were wrapped around his neck while her face was pressed into the corner of his neck and shoulder. Ben’s arms were wrapped tightly around his girl; one hand was under her hair and around the back of her neck, while the other arm was wrapped around her back.

When they entered the city Ben realized she had fallen asleep. Her body had relaxed completely to a comforting weight on his chest. When they pulled up to his flat he carefully opened the door and climbed out. He shifted Ellie a bit to sit more comfortable in his arms with her legs still wrapped around him loosely. 

He turned to face the driver who was getting the luggage out. “If you could just bring that into the lobby I can get it tomorrow.”

“Nonsense sir, I can bring it up for you if that’s alright?” 

“That would be fantastic.” They walked into Ben’s building and rode the elevator up to the flat. When they got there Ben turned to the man, he dug out a few bills from his pocket and handed them to him. “Thank you very much, have a good night.”

“Thank you sir, you too.” 

When the door was closed and locked, Ben began climbing the stairs to his room. Tomorrow was Sunday, actually it was Sunday already. So he didn’t bother with alarms, just kicked off his shoes and climbed under the covers with Ellie still wrapped around him. He reached down and pulled Ellie’s shoes and socks off and tossed them onto the floor. Then he lay flat on his back to sleep with his girl.

\---

When Ellie woke up the next morning she couldn’t remember where she was. When she tried to move, strong arms wrapped tightly around her and she had to hold back her laughter. Now she remembered. She looked up and saw Ben was still fast asleep, they were laying on their sides and were still fully dressed. She tried to carefully untangle herself from his arms. Just as she was able to replace herself with a pillow he opened his eyes.

“Get back here.” He growled in a sleepy voice and pulled her back across the bed towards him. 

“I need the loo. Go back to sleep.” She giggled and climbed back off the bed. He mumbled something and went back to snoring gently.

Ellie freshened up and changed into a pair of his pajamas and t-shirts. Her stomach rumbled and she looked at the clock, it was nearing 1 in the afternoon. She tiptoed out of the room and quietly shut the door behind her. She went down to the kitchen and put together a tray of food. Some slices of cheese and salami, olives for her and pickled caper berries for him (she rolled her eyes at this). She put a plate of crackers on the tray and a container of sparkling lemonade. Pleased with her impromptu picnic she headed back up the stairs. 

When she entered the room Ben was still wrapped around the pillow, she didn’t like the circles under his eyes or how thin he look looked since she had last seen him. Ellie set the tray on the end of the bed and then sat next to him. 

“Ben.” She cooed as she traced his brows and nose with the tip of her finger. “Darling wake up and eat a little, then you can go back to sleep.” 

He moaned and moved to drag her back down on top of him. 

“Easy. Open your eyes.” When he frowned and opened his eyes she leaned down to give him a deep kiss. “Good morning.”

“Morning sweetheart. Why are you up?” His voice was rough with sleep. “What time is it?”

“Afternoon, sit up just a bit darling.” She moved some pillows so he could lean his back against the headboard. He moved around and roughly rubbed his face with his hands. Ellie crawled to sit across from him and picked up a piece of cheese and set it on a cracker. She handed it to him and he tossed the whole thing in his mouth with a smile.

“Mmm thank you love, I don’t think I’ve eaten since yesterday morning.” 

“I know you must be exhausted but you should eat something and then you can go right back to sleep.” She took a sip of lemonade and then offered him the glass.

“You didn’t have to do all of this. You should’ve woken me up sooner.”

“You shouldn’t have carried me up last night.” She scolded in response. “I was there to surprise you, not make you take care of me.”

“But I like having a warm teddy bear right when I get off the plane.” He teased her thigh with his toe. He reached for a piece of salami and a caper. 

“Ugh, I don’t know how you eat those things. They’re so bitter!” 

“Maybe you haven’t grown into your taste buds yet.”

“Maybe not all of us are as posh as you like to act.”

“You cheeky little thing.” He nudged her again with his foot. “I really was surprised darling. I can’t think of a better way to come home. Why didn’t you meet me at arrivals, not that I’m complaining.”

“I was under sworn oath not to leave the car. I guess our welcome home affection can be a little inappropriate for public.” She giggled as Ben threw his head back and laughed loudly.

They finished eating and as Ellie moved to take the tray back down stairs Ben came up behind her. He took the tray from her and placed it on the floor.

“Ben what are you-”

He cut her off with a deep kiss. He picked her up and threw her onto the bed. He climbed up on top of her and kissed her without stopping. When she needed to breath he moved his lips down the line of her jaw and to her ear.

“Oh Ellie how I have missed you.” He moaned and sucked her earlobe between his teeth. She let out a gasp and slid her hands up his chest to bury themselves into his hair.

“Oh God Ben! Do that again.” She moaned and squirmed under him. He chuckled and gave the lobe a sharp nip and then soothed the skin with his tongue. He moved to kiss down her neck. When he reached her shoulder he pulled back the neck of her shirt and found the freckles he loved to follow. He didn’t say it out loud but he thanked every God he could think of that he had the chance to kiss these freckles again.

“Ellie. Ellie I want you so badly.” He moaned into her collarbone. His hands were wrapped around her waist.

“Oh Ben I want you too. I’m yours Ben.” she moaned and she scrambled to reach for the bottom of his shirt. Her nails scraped up his back towards his shoulders and he let out a hiss.

“Fuck.” He pulled back and yanked his shirt off with one hand and then pulled hers off her as well. He looked down at the black lace bra that was fighting to cover her breasts, he smirked at her. “Were you hoping for something more last night?” He rubbed at the lace edging and then pulled carefully at the strap in the middle.

She smiled up at him and bit her lip. “I thought you might have missed me.” She batted her eyelashes up at him, innocently.

“Oh fucking Christ!” Ben let out a growl and pushed his face against her breasts. 

He rubbed his nose along the top of her bra before he pulled the fabric down so her breasts bounced free. His left hand slid under her so she was lifted off the bed slightly; his right hand brushed gently across her until her nipple prickled with the gentle touch. He closed his lips around her other nipple and sucked carefully. Ellie arched off the bed with a sharp cry. He rolled the bud gently between his teeth and then gave a sharp nip before smoothing it with his tongue and sucking it with his lips. 

He opened the clasp and yanked the bra from her body. Then he looked down to jerk his pajamas down her legs. She was laying in the center of his bed covered only by a tiny shred of lace panties. 

“Oh Ellie, how I have dreamed of this.” He moved to lay kisses across her stomach and over the line of her hip bones. “Do you have any idea how many times I got myself off just thinking of you like this?”

“Oh God Ben.” She tried to rub her thighs together to relieve some of the pressure.

“Do you have any idea the power you have over me?” He started to slowly pull her panties down her legs. Leaving wet, sloppy kisses down her thighs. She moaned again and felt his lips curl into a smile against the back of her knee. “Do you like thinking about me tossing myself off while I think about burying myself in your delightful body?”

When she didn’t answer he gently bit her ankle. “Words sweetheart.” He finally took her panties off and threw them onto the floor.

“Ben, you know I love it.” She looked up at him and he crawled carefully up her body. “I don’t want slow. Take me. We have time for slow later, I can’t wait any longer.”

It was Ben’s turn to moan and find himself at a loss for words. “Jesus Christ darling, you never stop surprising me.” He yanked down his clothes and fell on top of her. His hips fit easily between the cradle her thighs made. 

He kissed her deeply and they both moaned when he started rubbing his cock on her wet center. He ground himself into her as his fingers found her tight nipples and he plucked at them until they were a beautiful rose color. 

“Don’t make me wait.” She gasped out and wrapped her right leg up around his hip. 

With a groan he moved to push into her. They both held their breath until he was complete seated inside of her. 

Ellie let her head fall back onto the pillow and let out a muttered “Fuck.”

Ben’s hips snapped without his consent. “Darling you know what it does to me when I hear you say things like that.”

“Then do it.” She rose up on her elbows and arched her eyebrow at him. “Fuck me.”

“Fucking hell.” He said and he started to move. He moved his left hand under her hips to raise them slightly to meet his thrusts. He thrust hard against her, spurred on by the moans and cries escaping Ellie’s lips. Too soon he felt her start to shake around him. He moved his hand from her hip to find her clit. He rubbed it hard and fast to meet his thrusts into her. 

“Ben, that’s...I’m going to...fuck I’m coming.” She let out a cry and her body clenched around him as her muscles froze. He tried to hold off but a few seconds later he was right there with her.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” He repeated against her lips and he tensed as he came inside her. They both shook with aftershocks. Finally, Ben rolled so she was on top of him and they lay still, trying to calm their breathing. He rubbed his hands up and down her back.

When they were able to breath a bit quieter, Ellie rose up and looked at him.

“Welcome home.” She said with a smile. 

Ben laughed and kissed her hard. “In more ways than one.”


	21. Chapter 21

A few hours later Ben was the first one to wake up. He stretched his sore muscles and relished the burn in his thighs. He looked down at Ellie. She was curled into his side, her face pressed against his ribs while her hair was splayed over his chest. He couldn’t remember when he had been so happy. Making love to the woman you are in love with does that to you.

He rubbed his hands up and down her bare back. She moaned and tried to press closer to him. Feeling her arm on his stomach and her breasts pushed up against his side made him groan. He would never get enough of this woman. He looked at the clock and it was close to 6. He carefully laid Ellie down on the bed and pulled the blanket up over her bare shoulders. He kissed her softly on the forehead and climbed out of bed. 

He threw on a pair of clean pants and walked down the stairs to the kitchen. He looked at the fridge and knew that it would be pretty empty - he was surprised Ellie had managed to find what she had. So he looked through the takeaway menus and found a place with great chicken stew. He called up and ordered way too much food for the both of them. 

As he poured himself a glass of water he saw Ellie walking down the stairs towards him. The soft light made her pale white legs look exquisite, she was barefoot and undressed...except for his yellow button up. Her hair was a mess of brown curls and she was smiling sleepily at him. His hand froze on the tap and he watched her walk the rest of the way down the stairs until she took a seat at the counter.

“You’re a vision.” Ben told her with a rough voice. 

Ellie pulled at the collar of the shirt she was wearing. “A promise is a promise.” She looked up to see him grinning madly at her. “Are you hungry? Shall I make us something? Maybe a soup...it’s chilly outside.”

“I ordered us something. It’ll be here shortly.” He moved around the corner of the counter to stand next to her. “But much too soon for my liking.” When she looked at him in confusion, he smiled. “You said I could have my shirt back when I came home. I still need to take it off you.”

He slid his hands up her legs and under her shirt. When his long fingers wrapped around her hips he let out a low growl. “No knickers darling?” She shook her head and bit her lip. “Naughty girl.” 

He smashed his lips to hers with a moan. He forced his tongue between her lips and groaned when she sucked on it. He rubbed the roof of her mouth with the tip of his tongue and then traced the muscles running under her tongue. He moved his hands to the inside of her thighs and just as he was about to pull her legs open further she gave his hair a gentle, but firm pull.

“What is it?” He asked her breathlessly. His chest was heaving and so was hers.

“One of us will need to retrieve the food that will be here soon.” They both looked down to see Ben standing in only a pair of black pants between Ellie’s bare legs. She hopped off the stool. “I’ll go get dressed and be back in a mo’”

“Not on your life.” Ben growled at her and picked her up to sit back on the stool. He then turned and stomped up the stairs two at a time.

They lounged on the sofa and ate bowls of steaming soup while their legs were tangled together. Ben told her some of the day to day things that they hadn’t talked about over the phone and Ellie filled him in on the goings on with her author. They talked about the upcoming week and what the plans were. When Ellie told Ben that she had taken Monday off he was ecstatic. 

They lounged in the bed until late in the night. Quietly talking and touching each other, as though to prove that they were really there together. Ben proposed a vacation in the near future and Ellie agreed but said it had to be somewhere where they could swim every day. In the early hours of the morning they made love. This time was slow and sensual. Making up for the lost time they spent apart. Relearning every inch of each other and the small spots that made them groan. Finally they fell into a deep sleep. 

\---

The next morning Ellie woke up to the sounds of Ben in the shower. She stretched her arms high over her head and then crawled out from under the blankets. When she reached the shower door she saw Ben standing under the water with his arms leaning against the wall and his eyes closed. She opened the door and stepped in behind him. 

Ben opened his eyes when he felt Ellie’s arms wrap around his stomach. He stood up a bit straighter and rubbed her arms with his hands. 

“Good morning love.” He said in a sleepy voice. Ellie could feel the rumble of his voice against her chest.

“This is twice now I’ve woken up without you.” She scolded playfully.

“I’m sorry sweetheart. I wanted to make you some - Oh God.” He cut off with a curse when her hand started sliding down his stomach, just as she touched him where he wanted most, she moved to the line of his hip. Then she brushed her hand back up to his cock and gave him a gentle squeeze. He was already starting to harden. She ran the edge of her nails gently along the underside of his shaft and played gently with the excess skin.

“Ellie, Christ that’s good.” Ben let go of her other arm to brace himself against the wall.

She made a loose fist around him and rubbed back and forth a few times before dropping her hand to rub his inner thigh. She raised her hand back up to him and gently pulled the foreskin back and rubbed the pad of her index finger at the edge of his crown while her thumb rubbed across the tip of him. When Ben’s hips jerked wildly she gripped him tightly and gave a few quick tugs. 

“Bloody hell.” He moaned as her fist worked him quickly. His breathing started to become erratic and just as he thought his head was going to explode he dropped his hand to cover hers. “Enough.” He said gruffly as he turned to face her.

“But I want to-” She started to say and he cut her off with a hard kiss. Just as she started to return it he broke away from her. His eyes were bright with lust and she lost her breath at the look he was giving her.

“Turn around.” He told her. When she had her hands against the shower wall he pushed himself up against her. His right hand slid down between her legs and without warning he pushed a finger up into her. She gave out a cry and then moaned when he started moving in and out of her. “So wet already my darling. How did you get yourself like this?”

Ellie moaned and flung her head back against his shoulder. “Please Ben.”

“Were you laying in bed thinking of me in the shower? Where you touching yourself?” He gave a quick rub to her clit. “Did you touch yourself like this until you realized that you could come in here and I could give this to you?”

He added another finger and slowly rubbed her clit while he talked to her. “I was in here trying to be a gentleman and let you sleep. But I can’t be that man right now. Not while I have my fingers in you and you’re so warm and wet in my shower. Seeing water run over your gorgeous body makes me want to trace every trail with my tongue.” He felt Ellie start to grind her hips to meet his movements. So he pushed her a little harder. He crossed his fingers inside her and rubbed her clit in a random motion. Suddenly she started to tense up. 

“That’s right Ellie. Come all over my fingers. Come for me.” Ben growled in her ear and she let go. Not a minute later Ben removed his fingers and started pushing his cock into her. They both groaned at the feeling. “Oh Ellie, you feel so good.” 

He pulled out slowly and then pushed in fast. Ellie wrapped her arm up around the back of his neck and urged him on. They kept up the pace, Ellie grinding her hips back to meet Ben’s deep thrusts. When Ben’s thighs started to quiver she knew he was close. Ben moved his hand back to her clit and started rubbing fast. 

“No Ben, please. It’s too much.” Ellie protested with a cry but she didn’t fight him. Her body started becoming too hot, her eyes were straining to stay open.

“Give me one more Ellie. I know you can. Let me feel you come on my cock.” Those words made Ellie tense up and suddenly her body froze into a tight line . She cried out wordlessly until she didn’t think she had anything left. Ben thrust a few times and then joined her. 

They leaned against the wall for a minute to catch their breath. Ellie relished the feeling of the cool tile against her cheek. When Ben pulled away from her he gently turned her to face him.

“I didn’t hurt you did I?” He asked while he raked his eyes over her body to check for marks.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” she said with a breathless laugh and she raised up to press her lips to his. 

“Christ Ellie. That was fantastic.” Ben said with a small chuckle and then reached for the shampoo. He poured an amount into his palms and started washing Ellie’s hair. 

They took turns cleaning up and then climbed out of the shower. Ellie dried herself off and wrapped her hair in a towel. When she walked into the bedroom Ben had his towel wrapped around his waist and was rummaging through his dresser. When he saw her he smiled and shook his head. 

“What?” 

“How is it that every woman knows how to put their hair up like that?” He chuckled to himself.

“Is this your way of bragging about all the woman you’ve seen fresh out of the shower?” She asked with an arched brow. He turned around quickly and started stumbling over words. 

“I’m joking you idiot.” She rolled her eyes and sat down on the bed with a bottle of lotion. “I think it’s ingrained in our x chromosomes or something, along with the ability to have silent conversations with each other.” 

He walked over and gave her a kiss on the forehead and walked into the closet. “You’re so good to me Ellie girl. I don’t know how you can act like a human being when you talk about me with other women. I turn into a jealous monster when I even consider you with someone else. You should’ve seen me the night I saw the photographs of you and Tom together. I wanted to throttle someone.” 

He shuffled through his shirts for a moment until he realized what he had just said. Ellie hadn’t said anything so he walked slowly back into the bedroom. She was sitting on the bed with the bottle of lotion in her hand. 

“What photographs?” She looked at him confused.

“When you went out with Tom a few weeks after I left. There were photographs taken of the two of you together. My publicist sent them to me.” He watched her cautiously to gage her reaction.

“Why would that have been an issue? I don’t understand Ben.”

“My publicist monitors photos of me and of you so they can manage any possible stories. The pictures look very...suggestive. You two holding hands and hugging. I didn’t think it all the way through and lost my temper.”

“You believed the pictures?” She put the lotion down and covered her legs with her towel.

“I didn’t know what to think. I hadn’t been with you in so long and I just went a bit mad I guess. But Martin talked me down and I came to my senses.”

“Martin talked you down?” She repeated in a flat tone.

“Well Luke told him how I reacted when I saw them so he and Martin set me straight. It was nothing really. Tom called me the next morning and we talked. Just a bit of jealousy, time apart and all that.” Ben babbled his story out quickly trying to explain it correctly.

“This was the day that you called me in the middle of work wasn’t it?” He nodded. “And I kept apologizing for bothering you when you didn’t take my calls. You weren’t really busy?” He shook his head no.

Ellie let out a breath and stood up from the bed. She picked up her clothes and walked towards the bathroom. 

Ben grabbed her arm and stopped her. “Ellie listen I didn’t-” She turned and put her hand up to cut him off.

“I’ll be right out.” She went into the bathroom and locked the door.

Ben ran to throw some clothes on so he would be ready when Ellie came out. It seemed to take a lifetime for her to come back into the bedroom. She was dressed, her hair was done and her face was set. Ellie gathered up her things from the chair in the corner of the room. 

“Ellie?” Ben asked cautiously.

“Let’s go down stairs.” She told him and she walked out of the door.

When they were both settled on the couch she turned to face him. He reached for her and she folded her hands and placed them in her lap.

“Why don’t you start from the beginning?” She said calmly, without emotion. “You received the pictures from your publicist.”

“I…” Ben cut off and cleared his throat. “I got an email with the pictures. You and Tom at dinner, holding hands and you leaning into him. I was in an interview with Luke so he saw me and the pictures on my mobile. That night Martin came up to talk to me about it and I was a bit pig headed with him.”

“You believed that I was with Tom?” She asked. “You thought that I was cheating on you with Tom.”

“I didn’t know. I kept thinking that I wouldn’t blame you and that you deserve someone better. I just drank myself to sleep and the next morning Tom called. His publicist sent him the same thing. He told me that one way or the other you would never ever do that. And I knew then that I had been an ass.”

“That’s when you called me?”

“That’s when I called you. You were so understanding about not getting a hold of me, and so accepting of the time away that it just made me feel like a bigger prat.” He rubbed his hand over his face and looked at her.

“Ben. You asked me to trust you again and I spent four weeks apart from you and I well and truly trusted you. Yet, when you were given the slightest doubt you gave into it. I have never given you a reason to doubt me.”

“I’m so sorry Ellie, it was weak of me. I trust you implicitly.” Ben told her vehemently.

“What we have is still new and fragile. It takes work, from both of us.” She looked up at him and he gave a shy smile and nodded. “Both of us, and Ben it can’t keep being me that holds us together.”

He pulled her hand to his face and kissed her palm. “I know my darling. I want you to lean on me too.”

“I am humiliated that you thought the worst of me,” Ben squeezed her hand, “And that your friends now think that too.”

“Don’t be silly, of course they don’t.”

“They are your friends first Ben, no matter how close I am with them.” Ellie’s shoulders slumped. “Tom and I have been friends almost as long as you and I. If this is going to be an issue then that is something we need to discuss.”

“I wouldn’t dream of telling you not to see a friend.” 

“Then that’s that. I had dinner with Tom, which you knew, and that was it.” Ellie stood up and started gather her bag.

“Where are you going love?” 

“I’m going home. I have some things I should do and I know you must have a lot that you need to take care of. I’ll call you tonight?” She asked when she turned to face him.

“I was hoping you would stay here.” Be said quietly as he stood in the center of the living room.

“I think we still need to take things slowly. I’ll call you tonight.” She walked back to him and wrapped her arms around his neck to kiss him. They kissed for a long moment and she pulled back. Ellie picked up her bag and walked to the door. “Bye Ben I’ll phone later.” 

“Bye Ellie.” Ben said when he heard the door close behind her.


	22. Chapter 22

The next week went by slowly for Ben. He talked to Ellie constantly but he wasn’t able to see her in person. She had late afternoon meetings to make up for taking Monday off and when she was free on Friday he had a meeting regarding the next Sherlock. They kept in contact and everything went forward as normal as they could make it. Ben, however, was out of his mind not being able to see Ellie. 

Finally they were able to get together on Sunday night. They were going to meet Tom, Alice, Martin and Amanda for a couple of drinks and some cheap food. Ben called Ellie that morning to ask about the plans.

“So I’ll come pick you up today around 6?” He asked.

“I’m in the middle of finishing up some things, I can just meet you there.” 

“Can I see you earlier today?”

“I’m just so busy right now, why?” Ellie sounded a bit wary at his persistence.

“Are you avoiding me?”

“Of course not, why would I?”

“I’ve been back for a week and I’ve only seen you once.” He paused and then asked the question that had been on his mind. “Are you upset about the jealousy thing?”

“Don’t say it like that.” She let out a huff, “It’s fine we’ll move past it.” 

“What are you doing that is so important?”

“Laundry?” She said uncertainly.

“Well, may I come over and help? I’ll bring lunch.” When she didn’t answer he played all of his cards. “Pretty please Ellie girl? Whatever you want to eat it’s yours. And I’ll bring you a 99 ”

“Alright I can see your puppy dog eyes through the phone.” She laughed. “Fish N’ Chips? And I want two flakes in my ice cream.”

“I’m leaving now!” She could hear him rustling around and dropping things.

“Wait, Ben it’s only 10 in the morning. Come a bit later.”

“See you in a bit love!” And he clicked off the line.

Ellie stared at her mobile and then looked around her flat. She hadn’t felt like doing much cleaning when she got off work so her home looked like a wreck. Ellie dropped her phone and then went to the living room to start picking up books and putting them in a pile, then she stopped halfway through and walked to the kitchen and started grabbing up glasses. 

“Stop, stop, stop.” She told herself. “First things first.” And she ran to take a shower.

Forty five minutes later Ben arrived with both arms full. When Ellie opened the door she still had damp hair and she looked frazzled.

“What’s all this then?” He asked her with a raised eyebrow.

“I wasn’t expecting anyone to come over so I had to get ready.” She took one of the take away bags from him and headed for the kitchen.

“It’s just me, you didn’t need to go to any trouble.” He moved her hands from the bags and turned her to face him. “Now give me a kiss and I’ll give you a treat.” He waggled his eyebrows at her to make her giggle. Ellie held onto his shoulders and raised up on her tip toes. She pressed her lips to his, lingering for a moment. When she didn’t feel Ben’s arms come around her she opened her eyes and looked at him confused. He smiled and brought his arm up, in his hand was her ice cream with 3 flakes sticking from it.

“Oh!” She clapped her hands and took the ice cream. She bit into one of the flakes and her mouth was immediately covered in chocolate shavings. Ben reached for her chin and slowly kissed her, sucking the chocolate off of her delicious lips.

“Hello stranger.” He said quietly against her mouth. Then he leaned down to steal a bite of her ice cream. “Mmm…”

When they were sitting on the couch picking at their chips Ben cleared his throat.

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Not really.” Ellie mumbled around a piece of fish, after a pause she added, “I’m sorry I was avoiding you.”

“I’m sorry I doubted you for one second. I truly am, I trust you with all of my heart.” He took a breath to steal himself for what he wanted to say next. “Ellie you can’t keep running away. We can’t work through this if you avoid me when something has happened.”

“I know.” She said quietly and put her food down on the table.

“Sweetheart look at me.” He put his own food down and reached for her. When he had successfully pulled her in his lap he cupped her face with his right hand. “It’s me. Talk to me please. You had every right to leave last week I completely understand that. But it makes it difficult when you won't see me any time after that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want you to apologize, Ellie girl. I want you to talk to me. Whenever things get difficult you pull back into yourself. But I want you to be able to give me your problems.” He rubbed his nose against hers. “I have pretty broad shoulders, I can carry some of the weight for you.”

“You’re right.”

“I’m always right.”

“Will you shut it for one minute.” She pushed against his chest but his arms only tightened around her. “I’ll try harder. I’m just used to handling problems on my own, it’s tough for me to let that go.”

"I know sweetheart.” Ben ran his hands through her curls. He crushed his mouth to hers. "What do you have to do today?”

“It’s alright we don’t have to that, we can go do something if you like.”

“Don’t be silly. Have you seen me do dishes? I’m so sexy you won’t be able to contain yourself.” He stood up with Ellie still in his arms. He walked over to the counter and set her on the surface. 

“But right now I can’t contain myself.” Ben said in a deep voice and he kissed her deeply. He put his hands on her knees and spread her legs so he could fit in between them. When they took a breath he slid his lips down her smooth neck. Ellie gripped the bottom of his shirt and started pulling it off.

Ben clicked his tongue at her and pulled away. “None of that young lady. We have chores to do.” Ellie pouted and slid off the counter. Then she slid down the front of him until she was on her knees. He let out a deep breath when she started undoing his belt. 

“Well a few minutes wouldn’t kill us.” He said with a groan.


	23. Chapter 23

They were late getting to the pub so everyone was already sitting down. Tom saw them first as they were weaving through the crowd. He stood up and waved like a loon.

“Will you sit down you bloody idiot.” Martin groaned and covered his face with his hand.

Tom couldn’t wait any longer it seemed and walked to meet the couple. He gave Ben a hug that involved a lot of back slapping. Then he reached for Ellie and lifted her off her feet, when he set her back down he kissed her cheek.

“Come on you two.” He pulled Ellie back to the table. 

When they reached the table Alice stood up to give Ellie a hug, when they broke apart Ben leaned down to hug and kiss Alice. When he moved to walk back to Ellie, Alice gripped the front of his shirt. She didn’t say anything just gave him a stern look, Ben nodded briefly and Alice reached up to kiss his cheek.

After saying hello to Martin and Amanda, everyone sat down as Ben walked to the bar to order drinks. Amanda was in the middle of telling a story of how one of the kids got into trouble at school when Martin interrupted her. 

“Tom where’s Heather? I thought she would be in town around this time.”

“Oh she’s still in New York, we split up.” Tom said with a shrug. He appeared nonchalant but the whole table knew he was more upset than he let on.

“There’s this girl from the kid’s school. You’d really like her, she seems nice.” Amanda started telling Tom.

“Oh, look I think Ben needs a hand.” Tom said and almost ran from the table.

Ellie and Alice burst into laughter, while Martin just shook his head. 

“What? He needs a good fix up.” Amanda said indignantly. “Alice dear, if you ever want a fun date you need only ask.”

“I will keep that in mind Amanda. Thank you.” Alice smoothed her hair self consciously. “As much as I dislike being single, I can’t begin to imagine where I would find the time to date.”

At this Ben and Tom arrived at the table with hands full of drinks. When the drinks were given to their rightful owner the two of them sat down.

“I fucking need this! No tomorrow.” Ben said the last part lowly and downed his shot of whiskey. Ellie elbowed him sharply in the ribs and he reacted by grabbing her to kiss her soundly. 

“How is it that I always end up at the couples table!” Tom grumbled and did his own shot. “When you have couples for friends you are always the odd man out. Thank God for you Alice.” He wrapped his arm around Alice’s shoulders and raised his ale. “To being single and free!”

“Here, here!” Alice added and crashed her glass to his. “I don’t know how someone with your job could maintain a relationship, I don’t know how Ben and Ellie do it for that matter.”

“Do you know how to get to Carnegie Hall?” Martin asked.

“Oh shut it!” Alice said with a laugh.

“Alice who is your latest client?” Tom asked.

“Ugh. German travel arrangers.” Alice took another drink of her beer. “They are trying to re-configure their company.”

“Who is it?” Martin asked curiously.

“I can’t say. Confidentiality and all that shit.” 

“So you go in and review their business and then tell them what to do?” Tom asked.

“It would seem so.”

“Sexy.” Tom said as he finished his drink. “Come on you, I need your hands.”

Alice blushed, a look Ellie didn’t see much, and when Tom gestured to the empty glasses she smiled and stood to join him.

“What do you think of those two?” Amanda whispered to Ben and Ellie.

“They are both so self sufficient I would think they would fit together nicely.” Ellie said with a shrug. “But they’ve known each other for over a year. Maybe they’re not attracted to one another.”

“As soon as Tom gets his shit together maybe he’ll realize what’s right in front of him.” Ben answered. “Amanda are you glad to have Martin back for a time?”

“Not at all. Now I have 3 children to look after.” 

“You missed me, you little minx.” His hand moved under the table and Amanda jumped.

“Hey, hey. None of that now.” Ben admonished him.

“Well how about you Ellie? Glad to have this moron back home?” Martin asked.

“Always.” She reached up and gave him a lingering kiss.

“Oh come on let’s get on with it!” Tom said as he sat down rather forcefully. “Drinks, shots and then lets get some food.”

When everyone had drinks but didn’t reach for the whiskey Tom slid the glass to each person. 

“Come, come!” Tom yelled and raised his glass.

“Will you shut it! We won’t be able to leave with the attention you’ve been gaining.” Martin grumbled to him.

“Then take the shot!” 

They all drank their whiskey quickly and Ellie took a quick swig of her Guinness. 

The night went on. They order a few starters to share and while Martin was dipping a chip in sauce he looked at Ellie. He was more than a little pissed and his cheeks were flamed.

“Did Ben tell you about his cock up over the photos?” He slurred. Amanda grabbed his thigh and tried to give him some more food to counteract the alcohol in his system.

“Yes, not to worry.” Ellie smoothed over.

“If Tom wasn’t such a handsome devil it wouldn’t be an issue.” Ben said and laughed.

“Ben.” Ellie said sharply.

“I didn’t mean you would do anything, I meant that he’s so much better looking than I am.” 

“My darling, do shut up.” She kissed his lips.

“It’s true. I am a handsome devil. Alas, it cannot be helped.” Tom said with a shrug of his shoulders.

“My god.” Alice said with a smirk.

They ate dinner and laughed. Ellie hadn’t laughed this hard in so long. She always laughed around Ben, but seeing him with Tom and Martin together, she couldn’t contain herself. Ben and Martin seemed to get their cues from each other. The whole table couldn’t contain their laughter when Martin asked Ben to introduce him to the Queen.

“What the fuck are you on about?”

“Christ Benedict,” Martin put extra emphasis on his name, “Are you telling me you’ve never met the royal family?”

“Oh shut it.” 

“I want to meet the old girl!”

“I’ve had the pleasure to meet several members of the royal family” Ben drawled on.

“You can’t do it can you?” 

“No.” Ben said and took a swig of his whiskey.

“I met them too you know!” Tom said with a laugh. 

“I will kill you.” Ben said with a dark look.

“No you won’t.” Tom said in a sing song voice. “You love me! Ellie said so.”

When Ben turned to look at her accusingly Ellie raised her hands. “I said no such thing.”

“Yes you did! You said he can’t stay mad at me.” Tom pointed his finger at her and laughed.

“You two do make a beautiful couple. Between the curls and the cheekbones your offspring would look like cupids.” Alice said as she finished her drink. She suddenly let out a shriek when Tom pinched her gently.

“Traitor.” Tom looked around the table. “One more to make the night interesting? Come on Duck.” He stood up and pulled Alice up along with him. Grabbing her hand they headed to bar.

“Twenty quid they get together tonight.” Amanda said excitedly. When no one said anything she pouted. “You know I’m right!”

“I don’t think that’s the issue love. No one disagrees enough to make the bet with you.” Martin said with a tilt of his head. 

They all turned to look at the couple in question. Tom had moved Alice to stand in front of him at the bar and he braced his arms on the wood on either side of her. Alice was laughing and looking up at him to reply. She blushed a deep red and looked back in the direction of the bar tender.

“I remember those looks.” Ellie said with a little laugh and when she looked back at Ben she saw him looking at her. 

He was watching her with the look of a man in love. His eyebrows were raised slightly with a small smile on his lips. His pupils were dilated so that she could only see a small sliver of green. He reached up and carted his hand through her hair.

“You are so beautiful.” He told her quietly. He pushed his lips to hers gently and rubbed the back of neck. When they broke apart he didn’t let her go, only moved back so he could see her. “I am so thankful I have you, my Ellie girl.”

Ellie’s heart rose up in her throat, and just as she was about to answer she was interrupted by Tom and Alice’s arrival.

“Right you lot. What did we miss- oh keep it to yourselves you two!” Tom said with a laugh when he saw Ben and Ellie ignoring the rest of the group.

“Thank Christ you got back, we would’ve had to hose them down.” Martin said with a laugh as he helped Tom pass out the drinks. “Tom, what’s next for you?”

“Canada.” He said with a shrug. “I’ve never filmed a horror. I don’t know how I’ll sleep at night. Any advice?”

“Fairy lights?” Martin replied.

“A big knife?” Ben threw out.

“You lot are a big bloody help.” Tom grumbled and leaned into Alice. “You don’t like scary right?”

“God no. I have enough trouble with the real world. I don’t want to think about what else could possibly be out there.” Alice shivered at the idea.

“Alice you should go visit Tom while he’s out there. You’ve never been to Canada and it could give you a starting point.” Ellie offered.

“What on Earth would I see there?” Alice said with a giggle.

“Oh please come and see me!” Tom bounced in his seat a little. “We could look at the parks and the city really is beautiful.” 

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to get away.” Alice said with an uncertain tone. She turned and glared at Ellie.

“Oh Duck, we would have so much fun. No one ever comes to see me.” Tom gave Alice his best puppy eyes.

“I’ll check in with the office. Will you settle down.” She tried to hold him steady as he wriggled around.

Amanda looked over to Ellie and winked at her. Ellie gave her a smile in return. Ellie never learned how to wink. She had to think too long about closing one eye while keeping the other open so the person she was trying to wink at thought she had something in her eye. Ben was an expert at winking. When he winked at Ellie she fell into a fit of giggles and couldn’t regain her composure. It was also one of the sexiest things she had ever seen.

They had some dessert and then started bundling up for the way home. 

“This was fun.” Amanda said as Martin was buttoning her coat, the buttons didn’t always match the holes and the result was a bulging wool front. “Let’s do this again. Soon, you promise?”

“Promise.” Ellie said as Ben fumbled with her scarf.

“You kids go first and then we’ll walk a bit and find a cab down the road.” Tom said as he reached for Alice’s arm.

“Thanks mate. Owe you one.” Martin told him as he moved Amanda to the entrance of the pub.

They waited a bit and then headed out. Ben lead Ellie behind him while Tom held onto Alice’s arm. They stopped just before the door. They all kissed and hugged good bye and then head their separate ways. Ellie and Ben turned left to find a cab and when Ellie looked back over her shoulder she saw Tom leading Alice down the street to the right.

She nudged Ben’s shoulder and jerked her chin in Tom’s direction. “What do you think? If they don’t kill each other they might be great together?”

“Come off it, did you see Tom tonight?” He scoffed and wrapped his arm around Ellie’s shoulders. “That man is about as subtle as a grand piano falling from the penthouse to the basement through the stairwell.”

“You get very eloquent when you are pissed my darling.”

“Mmm and you seem to become completely seductive. Darling, what do you think? I say you’re in for a hard shag the minute the flat door is locked.” Ben’s voice lowered and he looked at Ellie from under his eyelashes.

“Come now, there a cab.” Ellie rushed to the curb and flagged it. They both fell into the back seat in a fit of giggles.


	24. Chapter 24

“What are your opinions on anniversaries?” Ben asked out of the blue a few weeks later.

“It is the date where something happened on that date a year ago?” Matt answered. Then he paused in thought. “Though it doesn’t always have to be a year, sometimes its a month thing.”

Ben huffed in frustration and started to say something else when Matt kept talking.

“It can also be a quarterly, a more than one year thing, a week thing, a day to day-”

“Oh will you shut it.” Ben said in exasperation.

“Oi! You asked my opinion!” 

“I meant how you thought it should be treated or celebrated, I know what the fuck it means!”

“What the bloody hell has you so choked up tonight?” Matt asked, his eyebrows raising so high they disappeared into his ridiculous hair..

“Skip it, tonight is a night to have a good time. My turn for this one?” Ben asked and jumped from the table to get a new round without waiting for Matt’s answer. When he came back a minute later he sat back down quietly with their drinks.

“Now will you tell me what the fuck you’re on about?” 

“It’s mine and Ellie’s six month anniversary next week.” Ben said quietly and took a swig of his lager.

Matt took a sip off his own drink. “And…”

“I think I want to celebrate or do something special for her.” 

“It’s a bit unconventional but I doubt there’s anything wrong with taking your bird out for a nice meal. What’s the hold?” Matt had turned his head a bit to show Ben that his problem sounded a bit mad.

“The thing is, Ellie and I had a bit of a row a few months ago. We sort of split for a while before we got back together.” Ben didn’t look at his friend when he offered this information.

“Christ, I had no idea.” Matt muttered and pushed his hair back off his face. “Ben, mate, you could’ve talked to me you know.”

“I was in the middle of Last Vow and I was having a difficult time getting my part in line. I didn’t want you to have to say something if Steven or Sue asked.”

“Ben I wouldn’t have-”

“I didn’t want to put you in the position Matt.” Ben said adamantly. “Anyways, things are really great now. We’re working together to see this through and I think she’s it for me man.” He finished with a smile.

“Well do you want to talk about it now at least?”

“Not really, I was an ass. I’ve had plenty of people tell me so.” Ben chuckled into his drink. “What I need is help about the goddamn anniversary.”

“Has she dropped hints?”

“You know Ellie. She wouldn’t ask for anything, ever.” 

“So you’re worried that if you do something for your anniversary she won’t consider the time apart as the entire relationship?” Matt raised his eyebrow at him.

“Yes?”

“Well you sound like a bit of an idiot.” He said with a shrug.

“Don’t sweeten it Matt, just come out with it.” 

“Is this something you want to do?”

“I love to do things for that woman. But she doesn’t like to be spoiled,” Ben smiled to himself, “I’m working on that.”

“You’re quite the dirty old man aren’t you?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be helping me?” Ben countered.

“Do it.” When Ben didn’t respond Matt kept going. “Take her out. That gorgeous creature of yours should be shown off.”

“But when she asks for the occasion?”

“Tell her. Say that even though you were apart you want to celebrate the time you’ve known each other and all that shit.” Matt finished his drink.

“You really should’ve been the writer, not Steven.” Ben laughed and finished his own drink. “Thanks man, I really appreciate it. You wanna grab a bite?”

“I can’t really, I should be going. Lily’s in town and I want to see if I can catch up with her.” Matt put on his coat. When Ben stood to shake his hand Matt grabbed his shoulders. “Don’t leave me out just because of work next time. Alright man?”

“Right.” Ben said with a smile and the men hugged briefly before Matt headed out. 

Ben contemplated heading home and then dug out his mobile. He punched a few buttons and then held the device to his ear. “Hello gorgeous.”

\---

Hours later Ellie was laying in bed with the blankets pulled up tightly over her shoulders. She was floating between dreams as she waited to fall to sleep. A slight nightmare made her jerk suddenly, kicking her leg a bit. She snuggled back down into the pillows when she felt a big hand slide over her stomach. She was rolled over onto her side and pulled back into a strong, warm chest. 

“Are you alright love?” Ben’s voice asked her in a deep, sleepy voice. He slid his left arm under her neck so he could wrap it around and over her shoulder. His right arm slid all the way across her stomach so his long fingers could wrap themselves under her hip. 

“S’ fine.” Ellie was fighting sleep at this point. When Ben held her in this tight of an embrace, she wasn’t going anywhere, she couldn't fight the happy sleep that was going to claim her.

“Can I ask you a question?” He whispered a minute later.

“Mmm?” 

“Can we go out on Wednesday? I’ll make reservations.” 

Ellie’s eyes popped open. She tried to turn over but Ben’s arms didn’t release her. “What’re you on about?”

“I want to go out.” He gave her a tight squeeze and kissed her neck. “Let’s go out.”

“Whatever you want my darling.” Ellie said sleepily. “Can we talk about it in the morning?”

“Of course.” Ben kissed her neck again. “Go to sleep Ellie girl.”

\---

Ellie woke up that Saturday morning to the most delicious feelings. She was rested and was waking up to slow trembles through her body - probably just the aftermath of the night with Ben. When she started to come to her thoughts a bit more fully she realized that she was incredibly aroused. She started to stretch out her legs and thighs when it came to her. 

She sat up with a sharp cry when Ben nipped her clit in between his teeth. Ben immediately pushed her down with a big hand on her chest and then moved that arm to push down on her hips. 

“Ben, what are you-” She was cut off when he pushed two fingers inside her. He slowly, but constantly rubbed that little rough patch inside her. He moved his fingers roughly in and out a few times. He released her clit to move his tongue lick the wetness that was suddenly leaking out of her, suddenly he pushed his tongue inside her alongside his fingers. 

“Fuck.” Ellie reached her arms above her head to grab onto the headboard. “Ben I’m so- oh Christ right there.”

He moved his tongue back to her clit and licked it in small circles. When it became more difficult for him to push his fingers inside her he sucked hard on her clit while flicking it with the tip of his tongue. Ellie let out a moan while her body tensed underneath him. 

Ben pulled his fingers out and pushed them into his mouth while he looked at the lovely, naked woman beneath him. 

“Do you want to go back to sleep?” He asked her breathlessly. She didn’t answer, only pushed him backwards. Neither of them were wearing clothes after last night so it didn’t take much longer for Ellie to raise up and push him inside of her. When she slid her knees out a bit on either side of him Ben let out a deep groan. “I’ll take that as a no.” 

Ellie didn’t answer that either. Simply raised up on her knees to drop back down. They kept up this rhythm for a bit until Ben grabbed onto her hips and roughly moved her back and forth, grinding her clit against his stomach. 

“More.” Ben asked in a breathless voice. Ellie leaned back to rest her hands on the bed by his thighs. When she moved this time Ben could see her lift slowly off of him and then see his cock disappear inside her. Watching this a few times he was suddenly out of control. He reared up and slammed Ellie back onto the mattress, she didn’t argue, just held onto his shoulders. Ben continued to slam into her and when he felt as though he would lose it, he reached down and pinched Ellie’s clit. 

“Come for me you minx.” He growled as he rolled and pinched her clit between his fingers. Ellie didn’t have a chance to answer before her body seized up and jerked against his. When Ben felt her tighten against him he let go of the orgasm that he was holding back. He thrust a few more times until they were both spent and breathless.

They lay in bed together, Ellie wrapped herself around his body. Their bodies relaxed and Ellie lightly ran her fingertips across Ben’s body. She traced his hip bones, his abdomen muscles, up his sternum and across his collar bones. 

“How was Matt?” She asked quietly.

“Good. Just the usual catch up.” Ben raised up a bit to look at Ellie. “So you still want to go out on Wednesday?”

“Of course, but I don’t understand why you’re asking me this way.”

“What do you mean?”

“Usually we go with - let’s get something to eat.” Ellie gave him a playful shove and climbed out of bed. 

Ben watched her walk to the bathroom, unable to take his eyes off her body. She left the door open and started brushing her teeth.

“Let’s do something special. We haven’t gone somewhere nice in a while.” He called to her.

“Alright.” She said nonchalantly. She went to grab some clothes to get dressed. “Are you going to stay in bed all day?” She asked him with a smirk.

“Not alone, I’m not.” He lunged for her but she ran into the living room before he could reach her. He dramatically threw himself back on the mattress. “You’ll be the death of me!” He called after her, all he heard in response was her laughter.


	25. Chapter 25

As Wednesday rolled around Ben was a wreck. He had found a beautiful necklace for Ellie, a delicate silver chain with a single star in the center. Nothing too extravagant, Ellie wouldn’t feel comfortable wearing it otherwise. He had made reservations at a steakhouse that had been getting great reviews for nine that evening. He stopped by the florist near his flat and bought a bouquet that he hoped she would like. When half after seven came he was walking into Ellie’s building. He was jittery and nervous when he knocked.

He held his breath when she opened the door. She was wearing a black cocktail dress with black lace covering her shoulders. Her hair was done up into loose curls on the top of her head, and her eyes were rimmed with smoky makeup.

“Do you want to come in?” She asked uncertainly when he didn’t say anything.

“I...Yes...Ellie you look beautiful.” Ben finally gushed out when he got a hold of himself. He took a few steps into her flat and turned to face her. “These are for you.” He handed the paper wrapped flowers to her.

“Oh these are lovely. Thank you.” Ellie’s face burst into a grin and she headed towards the kitchen. When she looked at him standing near the door waiting for her, she swooned a bit. He had a dark grey suit on over a black dress shirt and tie. “You look very handsome yourself.”

He didn’t say anything, only walked over to her and pulled her to him. He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her for a long moment. When they broke apart Ellie reached up to wipe the lipstick off of his lips. 

“Now I need to fix this.” She giggled and pointed to her own lips. She disappeared into the bedroom.

“You may as well bring it with you, I don’t think I’ll be able to only kiss you once tonight.” He said with a laugh. 

When she reappeared he held her coat for her to put on. They walked downstairs and found a cab. The ride was a bit of a long one but they finally pulled up to the restaurant.

When Ben helped her out of the car she looked at the name of the restaurant. “Oh Ben I’ve been dying to come here. Some of the girls at work have been hearing about it.” She was so excited as he held the door open for her. He placed his hand on the small of her back to lead them to the hostess, once they were seated he looked at her in amusement.

“If you wanted to come here why didn’t you say something before?” He looked over the wine list and found something he was sure she would like. 

“It’s much too expensive.” She said matter-of-factly. She was looking around the restaurant at the other patrons.

“You are killing me, Ellie girl.” He covered his face with the menu.

“It is! Even if you did let me pay, there is no way I could afford it. It’s not fair for me to expect you to take me out to expensive places if I can’t afford it myself.”

“Darling I want to take you wherever you want to go, no matter the cost.” He stopped her when she started to interrupt. “No matter the cost. I am lucky enough to be able to take my girl where she wants to go. You don’t have to say outright that you want to go somewhere, just talk to me about it. I know you hold back things that you like.”

“What do you mean?” Ellie was blushing furiously.

Before Ben could answer the waiter came over and he ordered a bottle of red wine for them and the man walked away.

“I think you hold back your opinions on things, because it might be expensive or something along those lines.” Ben searched Ellie’s face; he saw no argument only embarrassment. “Oh Darling look at me.” 

He waited until she looked up at him. “There are those beautiful eyes of yours.” He reached across the table to take her hand. “I want you to tell me that you like that dress or that you think a bracelet is pretty, or that you’re interested in a restaurant.”

“Do you promise not to act on it?”

“I promise that I won’t run out and buy it right away. I like knowing what you like so I have an idea for the future.” He raised his eyebrow at her with a smile.

“Alright then.” Ellie agreed and looked down at her lap, her face a wonderful shade of pink.

“Hey you.” Ben said as he nudged her foot with his own, when she looked up he smiled. “Are you hungry?”

They had a delicious steak sliced and served with potatoes and vegetables. Ellie always had a fondness for red meat so Ben played that to his advantage. When dessert came around he asked for the check rather than the menu. When Ellie looked at him in confusion he only smiled back.

Late that night they found themselves back in Ben’s flat. Ben pulled Ellie by the hand until she was sitting on the sofa. When he came back from the kitchen he had a chocolate mousse that he had been saving for this night. He sat it on the table between them and lifted a spoonful to Ellie’s mouth. In the middle of dessert he stood up to fetch his jacket.

“I’ve been carrying this all night to wait for the right moment, but I want to give it to you now.” He sat down next to her and put the long velvet box in her hands. 

He held his breath as she opened it. When she saw what was inside her fingers trembled. She lightly brushed her fingertips across the silver chain but didn’t say anything. Ben started to say something more but waited for her.

“Oh Ben, it’s beautiful.” When she turned to look at him she had tears in her eyes. “I love it.”

He pulled her into her arms and held her. Suddenly she pulled back with a cry. “What is it?”

“I almost dropped it!” She grabbed the jewelry case from the edge of her lap. Ellie placed it carefully on the table and slid into Ben’s lap. Then she picked the kiss up from where they left off. A minute later they both broke apart. “It’s so beautiful.”

“Sweetheart, it’s just a little thing. Don’t worry about it.” Ben touched the tip of her nose with his finger.

“What is this for? I had such a wonderful dinner, I just…it feels like I’m missing something.”

“Well…it’s been six months since our first date. I wanted to celebrate it a bit.”

“Oh, but I didn’t get you anything.” She pulled back from him and looked horrified. “I can’t believe I didn’t realize, I’m so sorry. I’m so stupid-”

At this Ben cut her off with a deep kiss.

“You were so wonderful with the flowers and dinner and now-”

He kissed her again.

“Can I get you something tomorrow-”

He covered her mouth with his and pushed her to lay back on the sofa. When they broke apart for air Ellie didn’t say anything.

“Have you given up?” He asked with a small laugh.

“Ben?” 

“Yes my Darling?”

“Ben, I love you.” Ellie’s eyes were shining with tears and her fingers played nervously with the collar on his shirt.

Ben’s breath caught in his throat and his heart was hammering behind his ribs. He couldn’t answer right away, he just pulled her to him in a tight hug. 

“Oh Ellie I love you so much. My darling girl.” He pulled back to kiss her lips and then her cheeks as tears rolled down. “This is the most precious gift you could have given me.” 

He pushed her down onto the cushion and kissed her over and over and over again. He slid his hand down under her lower back to raise her to his body. 

“I love you.” He whispered as he pulled her hair out her clip. He pulled his fingers slowly through the soft curls and wrapped a strand around his finger. When he moved back a bit she pushed on his shoulders so he would sit up. “What is it?”

She reached for the jewelry case and opened it again. She slowly and carefully slid the necklace out of the velvet container. When she undid the clasp she handed it to Ben. When he took it from her she turned so her back was to him, he pulled her hair up and secured the necklace in place. He took her by the shoulders and turned her back to face him. Ellie was touching the small star and smiling at him, he bent slightly to place a kiss on her throat.

“It’s so beautiful. Thank you.” She whispered. 

“It’s not much, I know you don’t like anything too flashy.” It was Ben’s turn to nervously fiddle with the necklace.

“It’s perfect.” Ellie put her hand on the side of his face and rubbed her cheekbone with her thumb. “I love you Ben.”

His face broke into a grin. 

“Take me to bed.” Ellie told him. He surged to his feet and pulled her up into his arms. She giggled as he bound up the stairs to his room.


	26. Chapter 26

The next month went by quickly. It was time for Ben to leave again, but this time it would only be for a few weeks. On a Sunday morning they got themselves together and decided to drag Tom out for brunch. As they walked up to Tom’s flat they were arguing.

“Because the studios were very strict on what you could do within your contract. She had to sing that song, they wanted her to be memorable so they could sell the movies.” Ben told her in a frustrated voice.

“All she does is sing ‘Que Sera Sera’ in every movie. She drives me crazy.” Ellie replied while throwing her arms up in the air.

“But you like it when she sings it in ‘The Man Who Knew Too Much’” 

“That doesn’t mean she has to sing it for the rest of her life.” They had just reached Tom’s corridor. As Ellie opened her mouth to continue arguing her point Ben pushed her up against the wall and silenced her with a deep kiss.

“I surrender. I will never again attempt to praise Doris Day to you.” He murmured against her lips and then kissed her again.

She smiled up at him and then pushed lightly on his chest. “Come on silly man. Does he even know we’re coming?”

“Well, he didn’t pick up but if he’s busy you and I can go alone.”

“I hope he’s here then, I wouldn’t want to spend more time with you than I absolutely must.” She squealed when he swatted her bum.

They reached the door and Ben hit the buzzer. After a minute the door was opened by a shirtless Tom. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw who it was.

“Oh hello.” He said, trying to sound casual.

“Are we interrupting something?” Ben asked as Ellie tried to hold back her giggles. 

“No, no, no. Of course not.” Tom said quickly while he nervously rubbed his fingers through his hair.

“We came by to see if you wanted to go grab some brunch, are you free-” Ben was interrupted by a woman’s voice.

“Tom, I’m starving are you hungry?” She called out.

“Is that…”Ellie asked with wide eyes and she pushed past Tom to walk into the flat. “Alice! You are totally busted!”

She yelled at her best friend who was currently in the middle of Tom’s living room with nothing on but a towel. Alice covered her face with her hands and let out a sigh. 

“Yes, yes, I’m with Tom it just sort of happened.” Alice said with a groan.

Ben let out a deep chuckle at the two girls currently yelling at each other. Tom just shuffled his feet as he stood by the now closed door. 

“So how long has this been going on?” Ellie asked.

“I don’t know, a while I guess. I just didn’t want to tell you before I knew for sure.” Alice said with a shrug.

“You didn’t know what?” 

“That we would make a go of it.” 

“And now?” Tom asked her this time as he took a step toward her.

“I want to.” Alice smiled shyly at him.

He strode over to her, pulled her up into his arms and kissed her soundly. She giggled and when he set her back down her towel pulled off. Ben whirled around with a hand over his eyes and Ellie just rolled her eyes at the couple. Alice scrambled to cover herself back up and then ran to Tom’s bedroom.

“Well then.” Ben said once he turned around. “Brunch?”

\---

An hour later the four of them sat around an outside table at a café nearby. Ben had been staring at the menu for the last twenty minutes trying to decide what to order.

“For the love of all that’s...will you just choose already?” Ellie told him as she tossed her own menu onto the table.

“But I want something sweet.” He whined to her.

“Then get the waffles, you love those.”

“I have to cut back, I can’t get something like that.”

“Well then get the omelet.” 

“What are you getting?” He asked her.

“The turkey Panini. I’ve told you three times already.”

Tom and Alice hadn’t been listening to the couple on the other side of the table. Tom was holding Alice’s hand and slowly dragging his index finger between each of hers. She couldn’t hold back the shivers as she watched his eyes become darker as he looked down at her lips. He leaned in and pushed his lips against hers. 

“We are in public.” Ben drawled out at them. They pulled apart as Alice blushed furiously.

“You know,” Tom said. “I never was this up in arms about the two of you acting like grade school children.”

“I’m older and wiser than you. Plus I need to protect Alice’s modesty.” Ben said with a shrug of his shoulders.

“I think I already lost that to him.” Alice countered and Ellie burst out laughing.

“Leave them alone, I remember when you couldn’t keep your hands off me.” Ellie told him as she poked at his shoulder.

“I still can’t keep my hands off you.” He growled and leaned down to pull her earlobe between his teeth.

“Jesus. I’ll take it easy, just don’t make me watch that!” Tom called out in mock indignation.

When the waiter came by they all ordered. Ben ended up picking French toast as well as an egg white omelet. Ellie rolled her eyes at him but he argued that he only wanted a bite or two and then she could take the leftovers home for dessert later.

“So you leave soon, yeah?” Tom asked Ben as he sipped at his water. He and Ben had water while the girls were giggling over their champagne.

“Tuesday. We’re doing some reshoots and then I’m back for a month before I’m off to Australia of all places.”

“Chris has a place there, by his family. But I think him and Elsa have been living in LA for the last year or so. Are you going to surf?”

“I’m certainly going to try.” He let out a chuckle. 

“Are you going to visit, Ellie?” Tom asked the woman currently buttering Ben’s toast for him.

“I hadn’t thought about it actually.”

“That’s absolutely genius!” Ben turned to look at his woman. “I’ll extend my trip a bit and we can do the touristy thing. Can you take some time off?”

“I’ll talk to my boss in the morning. I wouldn’t mind a beach getaway.” She placed the buttered bread on his plate for him.

“Thank you my darling.” He murmured as he scooped some of his eggs onto the corner of his toast.

After they were done eating the girls were into their second bottle of champagne. After a time Alice made Ben switch seats with her so she and Ellie could whisper between themselves. The men watched the girls scoot their chairs close to each other and then start talking animatedly.

“So...Alice?” Ben asked Tom.

“How did I miss her? She’s so fucking amazing.” Tom said with a bit of a wonder in his tone. “Have you heard her talk about business strategy? I had no idea that hearing someone talk about employee motivation and debt reduction could be sexy. She’s so powerful and confidant when she’s talking about her work but she has this beautiful shy demeanor.”

“You sound like you’re falling in love with her.”

“Jesus, Ben. I don’t think I ever had a chance. Have you seen her blush?” 

“Yes, yes she’s very cute.” Ben said with an eye roll.

“Ben. I am completely fucked.”

“Well I should hope so.”

“That’s not what I meant you ass.” Tom hit Ben’s shoulder.

“Here it is ladies and gentleman, the day the mighty Hiddleston has fallen.” 

“Why do I even bother spending time with you.” Tom said as he rolled his eyes for what seemed like the millionth time that morning.

“How does she feel about you traveling so much? I mean you’re not even really going to be in town for the next year.”

“Well she travels a lot as well, so she sort of understands the complications and is willing to work for it.”

“That’s fantastic man. I’m really happy for you.” Ben slapped him on the back. “Alright ladies? Are you ready to leave yet?”

“Let’s go.” Ellie said as she pulled Alice to her feet next to her. They walked out of the restaurant without a second look at the boys. Ben rolled his eyes and pulled out his wallet.

“I’ve got this one Tom, you get the next.” He threw some bills onto the table and they hurried after their tipsy women.

When they reached the sidewalk their girls were in a sloppy embrace. 

“I hate when you leave. Are you going to come back for weekends at least? Ben’s leaving soon and I’ll need you.” Ellie said with a bit of a slur.

“I can’t come back every weekend but I’ll try and do every other. You’ll be alright, I love you so much.”

“I love you too. I’m so happy that you’re with Tom. He’ll take good care of you.”

Tom walked over and wrapped his arm around Alice. “Bye! Bye Ben! I love you too!” Alice called out as Tom led her to a cab that had just pulled up.

Ben chuckled as he wrapped his own arm around his Ellie. “She’s had a touch too much of the champagne.” He mussed.

“Right? She can’t handle it like...I can.” Ellie told him as she swayed on the pavement. Ben didn’t reply, just pulled her closer to him as they waited for a cab.

When they got in Ellie latched herself to his side. She bit his ear and then slid her lips down his neck, leaving bites and kisses as she went. When she met his collarbone he let out a moan.

“Ellie girl. We’re almost home.” He groaned out to her.

“Excellent.” She moaned into his ear. “When we get home I am going to pull all of your clothes off and drop to my knees. I can’t think of anything I want more than to take your hot, stiff cock into my mouth. While I’m sucking you off I want you to pull my hair so I can see how much you want me.”

Ben groaned and tried to adjust his pants but Ellie caught his hand and brought his fingers to rest between her thighs. When he felt the heat coming through the material of her jeans he let out a low moan.

“Jesus Christ.” He muttered.

“As much as I want to finish you in my mouth I’m going to pull back so that you have no choice but to fuck me hard.”

“Christ. If I had any idea that day drinking would do this to you I would have started this a long time ago.” Ben said in a low voice. 

When they pulled up to his flat he paid the driver and pulled Ellie forcibly out of the car. He threw her over his shoulder and ran through the lobby to his lift. Ellie was giggling and slapping at his ass the whole way.


	27. Chapter 27

“I don’t understand why you need so much time to pack.” Ben grumbled into the phone. They were leaving for Australia the next morning and he wanted Ellie with him, not at her place packing.

“Two weeks is a long time. It takes a while to figure out what I need to bring with me.” Ellie responded as she stood in her closet with her mobile on speaker.

“Just throw some bikinis in a bag and get your hot ass over here.”

“I need more to wear than just bikinis. Plus I only own two, I think I’ll just buy some while I’m over there.” She heard him mumble something in the background. “Keep it up mister, I’ll just spend the night at my place and meet you at the airport.”

“Ellie, love of my life, you wouldn’t do that to me would you?”

“Hmm...will you buy me some bikinis when we get there?”

“I will buy you an entire new wardrobe that consists only of swimwear and lingerie.” 

“Alright then, I’ll be by in an hour. Hungry?”

“Famished, I’ll order something and you can pick it up on your way?”

“Perfect. See you soon my love.” She hung up the phone and finished piling everything she would need into her suitcase and carry on.

\---

When they got to the airport there was paparazzi like usual but Ben took it all in stride. He took Ellie’s hand and pulled her behind him so most of their view of her was blocked by his big shoulders. She tucked her head down and kept her hand on his back so she knew where they were going. They walked up to check their bags and walked through the security in no time. 

When they were settled in the first class lounge Ellie finally had a chance to look around. Ben placed her and their bags on one of the sofas and went up to the bar to get them something to drink. When he came back he had two mimosas in his hands. 

“Here you are, my love.” He handed her one and took a seat next to her. “Are you excited?”

“Extremely. I’ve never been in first class before, this is going to be exciting.” She was practically bouncing in her seat.

“It’s a very long flight, the excitement will change to boredom very quickly.”

“That’s why I brought you with me - entertainment.”

“Oh well I’m glad to see that I can provide you with something.” He told her with a smirk as he pinched her gently on her waist.

They boarded the plane not long after, and Ben let her climb into the big seat by the window while he put their belongings in the overhead compartment. He sat down next to her with a book for each of them and his iPod. When the flight attendant came by he took two glasses of champagne and handed Ellie one of them.

“Mr. Cumberbatch,” She fluttered her eyelashes at him over the rim of her glass. “Are you trying to get me drunk?”

“Not at all.” He leaned in and pulled her earlobe between his lips. “Not yet at least.”

They spent the flight talking, reading and watching the different films and shows on the screens in front of them. Ben laughed at Ellie for listening to some of the music the airline offered, she pointed out that it was fun playing with a personalized television while on an airplane. They slept for awhile and ate when meals were offered. 

When they had finally landed in Sydney they were exhausted but happy. Ben pulled Ellie through the terminal a bit similar to how they had walked through Heathrow. They stood at baggage claim with Ellie’s faced pressed into his chest as he scanned the various bags for the ones that belonged to them. They headed to the rental car area and retrieved the information for the car Ben had reserved. They walked into the warm sunshine and Ellie covered her eyes with a pair of dark sunglasses while Ben slid on his RayBans. 

The next thing they knew they were at the hotel they would be staying in. Once Ben checked them in he led a drowsy Ellie to the room they had. He put both of their suitcases away and placed Ellie’s toiletry case in the bathroom next to his; when he walked back out he saw his girl standing at the large sliding glass doors that led out to the sand. He walked up behind her and wrapped his long arms around her, resting his chin on the top of her head.

“What do you think?”

“I think this is one of the most romantic things anyone has ever done for me.” She gasped out and her voice caught on the last word.

“Here now, what’s wrong my love?” He turned her so he could see the tears gathering in her eyes.

“I just love you so much Ben.” She threw her arms around his neck and pulled her legs up around his waist.

It took him half a second for him to catch his breath and then he was kissing her back and running his fingers deep into her hair, ruining whatever style she had chosen. He walked her over to the bed and pushed her down onto the mattress as he followed her and pushed his weight on her. She let out a deep moan and brought her hips up to grind against his as her bare feet slid down the backs of his legs until she was rubbing his calves with her toes.

“Christ darling,” He moaned out and then latched onto her collarbone. He bit the skin sharply and then worried it with his tongue before sucking it hard between his lips. He pulled away to admire the dark red mark that he had left on her perfect skin.

“Did you leave a mark?” She tried to angle her chin so she could see but it was just out of sight.

“I did, and I am going to leave a mark every single day that we are here.” He kissed the spot and let out a low growl. “You are mine.”

He pushed her back down on the bed and continued to kiss her breathless. When she pulled back for air he lifted his head slightly.

“How about we go for a swim and then come back for a nap? Try and get our jetlag in order. Then I will take you out for a indecently delicious dinner.” 

“Excellent.” She pulled out from under him and walked to her suitcase. She exaggerated the act of bending at the waist to retrieve her swimsuit and he let out a deep moan. “I’ll be right out.” She told him as she disappeared into the bathroom.

\---

They decided to visit the pool before venturing out to the ocean, less waves and less muscle usage. They swam around for a bit, tickling and pulling each other under the water as an excuse to get a grope of the other person's body. After a bit they swam up to the bar and Ben ordered them fruity drinks with double shots of alcohol. They swam away to an empty corner of the large pool and sat on a bench in the water. Ellie put her feet up into Ben’s lap and took a big sip of her drink.

“I think you are trying to get me drunk so you can have your wicked way with me.” She told him as she pushed gently at his lap with the tip of her toe.

“Steady on.” He told her with gritted teeth and caught both of her ankles in one large hand while he took a drink of his own cocktail. “Darling, you and I both know that I don’t have to give you a sip of alcohol for you to let me have my filthy, wicked way with you.” He gave her a lecherous smile and a wink.

She coughed into her own drink and a deep blush rose covered her face and down her chest.

“Oh I do love knowing just how low that blush goes.” He told her in a low voice as he dragged out the word - low.

She took another deep drink of her fruity slushy and let her eyes slide closed as she listened to his voice.

“Well onto less scandelous topics, my dear.” He told her as he tickled the bottom of her foot to get her to focus her eyes back on him. “What have you always dreamed of seeing or doing here?”

“I want to see the barrier reef and Ulru.” She said without a pause.

“Done. What else? What can you possibly dream up?”

“If I can see those for sure, everything else will be icing on the cake. What do you want to do?”

“Zipline through the rainforest, maybe try windsurfing.” He looked over at her and she had pulled her lower lip between her teeth. “What?”

“Zipline really?”

“Yes. Wouldn’t that be thrilling?”

“I guess. It’s just so…”She raised her eyes up to the sky as she searched for the right word. “Out of control.”

“That’s what makes it so fun and exciting.” He saw her pale a bit and he rubbed her ankle reassuringly. “You don’t have to actually zipline. You can always do something else.”

“I’ll think about it yes?”

“Of course. Tonight I do have something already planned.”

“Oh really?” She said with a smile and tried to push her feet back against his lap but he held her back.

“Besides that, naughty girl. We’re going to see the manta ray.” 

“What do you mean? See them?”

“We take a boat out after dark and they drop some lights into the water so we can see. Then we all get to jump in and swim around with them.”

She launched herself into his lap and hugged him. “Oh that’s brilliant. That will be so much fun.”

“Come on, you’re starting to prune.” He hopped out and pulled her up next to him. 

They walked back to their room with their arms locked around eachother. They stripped out of their swim suits and pulled on their robes before collapsing in the giant white bed. 

\---

At around ten that night they were on a boat with about fifteen other people. When they reached some designated location the crew dropped a few lights down into the water. Ellie gasped when she saw the clear water filled with black triangular shapes swimming around. After the boat was anchored everyone started slowly jumping into the water. Ben jumped in and then turned to get his Ellie girl. She cautiously jumped into the water and latched onto him. They all had on life jackets but she hadn’t taken into account the idea of swimming with actual creatures this live - and wild.

“Sweetheart, you’re fine. They’re not going to hurt you.” He said with a laugh but when he took in her frightened face he sobered. “What is it love?”

“I’m alright. Terrified but excited, just don’t leave me, please.” She tried to focus on his face while she tread water.

“Never.” He put her hands over his shoulders and swam away from the boat. When they were a bit away he stayed still as the huge sea creatures swirled around them. One of the rays flopped up to him and a fin hit the top of chest. “Baby, come be right next to me. I promise it’s alright.”

She moved away from him to be at his side, and he silently fell in love with how easily she trusted him. They watched the black and grey creatures swirling around them. The crew threw small fish into the water so the swarm became a bit bigger. Ben felt Ellie’s hand tighten on his and he turned to look at her. She had a huge smile on her face as she watched how beautifully the animals slid through the water. When one came close she reached out a hand and rubbed her fingers across the skin on the back of the ray.

A fin hit the back of her leg and she let out a muffled scream before grabbing onto Ben’s shoulders. When she realized it was just another ray she giggled.

They swam around for almost an hour. Ellie couldn’t get enough of the velvety texture on the back and tips of the ray’s fins. Ben was watching the animals around him in amazement but he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off the excited girl next to him.

Late that night when they were in their bed wrapped tightly around eachother Ellie pushed her back firmly against his chest. 

“That was one of the most amazing things I have ever done.” She said sounding sleepy and still in shock. “Thank you so much.”

“I will spend the rest of my life doing everything I can to make you feel like that.” He said into her hair. “I love you my Ellie girl.”


	28. Chapter 28

They spent the next morning lazing around in bed. Eventually Ben had some breakfast brought to their room and they ate it on their porch as the ocean breeze blew around them. 

“What do you want to do today?” Ellie asked Ben as he poured her a cup of coffee.

“Why don’t we go for a swim? There’s a place not far from here that we can swim and also see some beautiful reefs.” He looked at her with a smile. “Would you like that?”

“That sounds wonderful.”

They finished up their food and Ellie put on her bathing suit and moved to pull a pair of jeans on over them but found her way was blocked by a large man.

“Are you sure you need to wear so many layers, darling?” Ben asked as he brought his hands down to rest on her ass and he gave her a firm squeeze. 

“It’s easier for you, you only have to put on a shirt. I have to cover up a bit more to look decent.” She pushed on his chest to move him back but she tossed away the jeans in favor of a sundress he had recently bought her. While she was fumbling with the ties to the halter top Ben moved to stand behind her.

“Allow me.” He pulled her hair up and out of the way so he could tie a careful knot without catching her hair or skin in the strings. When he was finished he left a soft kiss on her skin and smoothed her hair back down into place.

“Thank you.” She said as she turned around to leave a kiss on his cheek. “Do you want to bring some food? We could find a store nearby.”

“That’s a great idea. Give me just a minute and I’ll be ready.” He skipped off to find a shirt, so she grabbed up her sandals and set about putting some necessary things in a canvass bag she had brought. “Ready?”

She nodded and he grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the room to where the car was parked. He followed her around to her side so he could hold the door and help her in, then he went around to his side and jumped in. They drove for a few minutes until they saw a few more stores and Ellie pointed one out and asked him to stop. He pulled over in a drop off area at her demand and looked over at her in question.

“I’ll just be a moment. Wait here.” She told him firmly, placed a quick kiss to his lips and then hopped out to head into the store.

She walked around for a bit, choosing some fruits, a round of cheese, and a loaf of some sort of bread. As she was making her final glance around the shop she saw Ben walking up to her.

“Darling, I was thinking about this or do you want a still wine?” He held up a bottle for her to look at.

“Didn’t I tell you to wait and that I would be right back?”

“I knew that was only a suggestion and that you really wanted me here to help.” He took the basket from her and placed the wine with the other things Ellie had already placed inside. After he glanced through her choices his head snapped up. “No sweets? Are you trying to kill me woman? No wonder you tried to sneak this past me.”

He grabbed her hand and pulled her to a section of biscuits and chocolates; he looked over his options for a moment and then pulled a roll of dodgers and dropped them into the basket. Then they walked up to pay for their items so they could finally head off on the day’s adventure.

They pulled up to a small beach that seemed to be fairly deserted and gathered up their things before heading to the sand. Ellie set her bag and other things down at the spot they found and pulled her dress off over her head. Before she had a chance to set anything up; Ben hoisted her over his bare shoulder and ran towards the waves. He pushed through the first few waves and then tossed her lightly into the waist deep water. He waited for her to come up for air, just as he began to worry, something grabbed his calf and yanked him off his feet.

He pushed himself out of the water spluttering out spit and air, trying to catch his breath. When he was able to breath and wipe the salt out of his eyes he saw his woman floating on her back a few feet away from him with a smirk on her face. 

“Why you little…” He waded over to her and pulled her up to him so he could give her a kiss. He pulled her up tightly against his body and continued to kiss the breath out of her.

When he couldn’t take it anymore he pulled her into deeper water. The waves weren’t high at this hour so it didn’t take long until they were past the break. Ben was able to stay on his feet but Ellie was too short to reach bottom. He slid one long arm down her waist and twisted his fingers into the stings of her bikini bottoms.

“Ben, we can’t. Not out here.” She moaned into his ear as she kissed down his neck.

He looked for a moment and then started pulling the two of them to a conveniently located outcroppings of rocks. When they were partially hidden he kept them in the same position so that he was facing the beach and her back was to the public. Then he slid his fingers down, past her bikini, and slowly into her wet entrance.

“Ah God, Ben, we can’t-” Ellie cried out.

“We can’t, but you can.” He moaned to her. “And if I don’t have my fingers inside of you again and again then I won’t be able to contain myself.”

He kept his fingers deep inside her but moved his thumb to rub over her clit. When she let out a cry of pleasure he continued his slow circles with his thumb; he wanted to keep her wet with her juices and not with the salt water that surrounded them.

“Ellie, do you know why fucking in the water is so sexy?” He growled at her and she could only moan in response. “It creates the opportunity to fuck someone in public without other people seeing. They usually can figure it out, but the body and the movements are generally hidden by the water.”

He rubbed a bit harder and then lessened his touch so it was a gentle tickle.

“This is sexy because it allows for the possibility of being caught. There are no locked doors or blankets to cover up.”

Ellie gasped and her legs shook at the realization. Ben wrapped his arm tighter around her waist and started to move his fingers in and out her; she cried out but was silenced with his lips on hers.

“Think about how amazing this feels. My fingers deep inside your hot, tight pussy while I’m watching the other people out on the sand. I can feel you shaking, you’re getting close. Why don’t you come for me my love.”

She moaned and he felt her arms relax around his neck while her thigh muscles contracted.

“That’s it. Come for me, you know it’s going to feel so good. Come all over my fingers.” He said and he latched his lips onto her shoulder and gave it a sharp, hard suck. 

At the sudden pain Ellie let her climax rush over her. Ben thrust his fingers back in and rode out her tremors until she was a whimpering mess, so he pulled out to avoid triggering her sensitivity. While he waited for her to come back he licked over the deep purple mark he had left on her skin. He had a few marks by now and he intended to add quite a lot.

“I can not believe we just did that.” Ellie murmured into his shoulder.

“Want to do it again? You were spectacular.” 

“Jesus, of course we can’t.” Ellie squealed at him and slapped his shoulder with her palm.

“No one noticed my love.” He kissed her forehead and the side of her face until she looked up at him. “Did that feel good?”

“Incredible.” She practically purred and pulled herself up his body with her arms around his neck. “You know it did. You could feel it.”

“Now that you’ve had your warm up are you ready for a swim?” He asked her with a dirty wink.

She laughed at hit him in the chest before swimming a short distance away from him. They swam around in the warm water for a while before Ellie grabbed Ben’s hand to pull him back to the shore. They found their bags where Ben had unceremoniously dropped when they first got there. After spreading out a blanket and flopping out on her towel, Ellie reached for the bag of food. She laid out the different choices they had and reached for an apple, but before she could take a bit the fruit was yanked out of her hands.

“Hey!” She protested as Ben covered the fruit with both of his large hands. She saw his knuckles turn white as his fingers clenched tightly and his twisted his hands roughly. Suddenly there was a crushing noise and when he pulled his hands away he had split the fruit into two halves.

“Show off.” She muttered with a grin and accepted one of the pieces from him.

“Only for you my love.” He took a huge bite of the fruit in his hand and gave her a grin around the food in his mouth. He finished up his apple and then rummaged around until he found the bottle of wine he’d brought. He fiddled with it until the cork popped open and then he realized that they didn’t have any glasses. “Well it looks like it’s straight out of the bottle for us.”

“Cheers.” Ellie said as she took a gulp from the bottle and then passed it back to him. 

They ate their lunch and finished the bottle of wine before laying back to enjoy to the warm sun. Ellie moved to lay on her stomach but Ben pulled her over to him. He adjusted her so that her top half was laying on his top half. He untied her bikini top but didn’t remove it, only rubbed his hand up and down her bare back. 

“I don’t want to go home, ever.” She mumbled into his chest.

“I won’t be here much longer after you leave. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I know but I’ll miss you.” She kissed his chest. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too my darling.”


End file.
